Hi all I've posted something like this before when my baby was 7 months and people told me it gets easier but he's 15 months now and I feel it's getting worse... I absolutely hate being a mum. I hate it. Most of the days I just find myself crying and crying, I do love my baby but I had a difficult start and found it hard to bond with him. Most of the days I just want to lie in bed away from him. I just want to be away from him that I wish I would go into hospital. I'm so sick of the same stuff with him everyday it's an never ending circuit. I can't talk to my family about this because they love him so much and they would be so cross and they said I'm a disgrace and not fit to be a mother. I have suffered mental health and depression from an early age and I feel having a baby has just made this worse . I had a difficult relationship with the father and every time I look at my baby it's a constant reminder of what the father did to me. I hate being tied to him. I miss my old life soo much I just want it back. I'm only 22 and I miss going out. I feel so bad for writing this because he's such a lovely child but I just feel like I can't love him the way all my family do. I feel so alone with no support I literally can't stop crying :(