The inevitable return of Mornington Crescent

[ComeIntoTheGardenMaud]

As winter approaches and the nights draw in, one’s thoughts naturally turn to wholesome, homely entertainment. Instead, though, I invite experienced players and novices alike to join me in a game of Mornington Crescent.

To keep the pace gentle, I’ll begin with an inverse Lepton to

Seven Sisters

The Metropolitan customs dictate that I have to be very careful with this so after much deliberation I am going to go with Northwick Park

Applying the Dick Principle, it's got to be Belsize Park. I may regret that move, but Who Dares Wins, as the colonel once wrote on a tightrope walker's left buttock.

The night bus rule must now be played, enabling us to catch the first train out to Acton Town

Ah, I see what you did there!

On the same principle, St Pancras

Who dares wins is very much the motto of the game of games, I feel, and has certainly helped me through the darkest moments of some very difficult games, such as the notorious Budapest playoffs of 1969.

Colliers Wood

What stunning play by everyone.
Puts me in mind to propose Lambeth North!

The afternoon hiatus regulations means my only option is Barons Court.

Sorry, it's the only reasonable, nay, rational, choice.

Clever play to pick a station with four tracks, so you can skip past some others. I will resist though and move to Hammersmith (District)

Interesting! I'm going west all the way to Ealing Broadway.

Cunning move, I can see what you’re trying to do there RomanMum but I think I can get around it,

Tottenham Court Road

Use of the Elizabeth line rule, how up to date. Never an option in the great game of 2017 that lasted 11 months.

Let's be simple and take the Central line back to Lancaster Gate.

I see a breakaway manoeuvre going on here so I give you Queensway

Excuse my temporary absence from today’s game. The Colonel and I heard rumours of an impromptu tournament in an ice cream parlour in Bexhill, so set off in hot pursuit, but it turned out to be a false rumour started by the Admiral.

Barbican

Gosh, that’s tricky. I think I can manage a Shackleton crossing to

Angel

You must have misheard Maud, it was a petshop in Eastbourne. The Admiral and I spent a very pleasant afternoon among the rabbits.

I think the last sequence of moves allows a triangulation, taking the midpoint across both the x and y axis brings us to

Cannon Street.

I still suspect foul play. The Admiral knew he would have no chance competing against the Colonel, so misdirected us towards Bexhill. How foolish we were to fall for it … but one must look forward, not back, so on to

Arnos Grove

A short move to Southgate. The Colonel is probably the grand master of the game of games.

Well, he certainly thinks so. He spends an inordinate amount of time polishing his trophies.

I’m feeling refreshed by my trip to the coast, so let’s play Penhaligon’s Perpendicular to

Northwood Hills

What ho! The long shadows put me in kind of many jolly evenings learning the game of games at Muse grandpére's knee...yes, it might have been a wooden knee, and yes it did creak somewhat in the damp of the ancestral home, but nonetheless I always hear the squeak of a matryoshka with a certain tendresse. Happier times, simpler pleasures...

Ah me. Well.

I've always longed to play this move. Finally. FINALLY! MERTON PARK!

The urge to shout 'HOWZAT' is curiously strong.

Ah yes. I suspect many of us learnt the game of games at the knee of an indulgent grandparent, who themselves might have done the same. Family legend says that our MC lineage thus goes back to the Duke of Wellington, although (obviously) the game was somewhat rudimentary then. In honour of which

Paris-Austerlitz

Ooh, Friday evening and international rules! Haussmann Saint Lazare

Oh I love the Friday evening international rules!

Off by fast express to the Eternal City. Euclide.

The Contessa was a particularly skilful player...

Yes indeed. I remember the Contessa in Venice in ‘89, when she won the championship with a coruscating counter-lateral to London Bridge. The Colonel was devastated to lose the match.

Berlin Alexanderplatz

I remember it well. You could cut the tension with a knife. No one, but no one expected that devastating last move.