Nannies - does it annoy you if houses are disorganised

[LovelyQuiche]

Our house is clean but a bit messy and there’s always something that needs doing.

I’m working a lot at the moment (full time but a bit random days) and dp works full time. We have a 10month old daughter

I make sure there’s food and nappies etc for dc, I turn the dishwasher on before I leave the house in the morning but the kitchen surfaces won’t be wiped because I’ve sorted breakfasts and lunches and the bins might not have been emptied and there’s clothes on the landing and shit in the lounge etc etc

i wish I had time to do everything but I don’t and dp does minimal as he’s a bloke (sorry I know it’s cliche). He does help in other ways

when I’m at work I sometimes think it might nark the nanny that things aren’t left in a tidy state for her when she comes in. But I’m flat out getting various shit done and it feels like fire-fighting

I assumed this is probably normal for a family but sometimes it crosses my mind that maybe the nanny might feel a bit…I don’t know…disrespected?

she’s lovely and seems to like working with us

Also, if the kids or parents spill/drop anything at the weekends, you can guarantee it'll still be there Monday morning for me to clean up, they're total slobs, not just untidy, but dirty too. What makes me laugh is that it says in my contract that I should leave the house as I find it at the end of the day, I think they'd be horrified if I did 🤣 Also, I'd be embarrassed to have someone working in my house if I was that dirty, I find it disgusting!

People mop their floors every day? Mine gets done fortnightly

WHAT?!

What are you DOING to it?

Who are these people mopping their floors everyday?

You either

• don't have kids & work full time OR
• you are messy AF and are trying to pretend you're extremely tidy on this forum 🤣

Whatever about clothes being put away but someone coming into my house to take care of my kids and dirty surfaces, overflowing bins and stuff in the sink is not on. She has to use these and prepare food. It literally takes 5 mins to wipe surfaces and bring out the bins. It's disrespectful to be honest. If the sitting room is full of shit it would make it not a very nice environment for her to be entertaining your daughter. tell your hubby to get his finger out and help you.

Could you both get up 10 minutes earlier? That would give you a combined 20 minutes extra to do the little things.

I don’t clean the floor every day and I don’t work at all!

Stickmansmum Today 10:59 I can hear my nanny hoovering the stairs right now. But mine is more a nanny housekeeper (by her choice). She basically uses her hours to replace me, not just mind the kids
I was very much like this as a nanny. my days as a SAHP are a very similar layout to those when I was a nanny. But I wouldn’t thank anyone in my family for leaving a mess for me to deal with and wouldn’t have been happy as a nanny to go in to work everyday to a mess. Dh very rarely leaves a mess for me to tidy up and I know on those days it’s because he is running late and I don’t mind, but regularly, I’d be cross. I’m no one’s skivy and nor is your nanny. Get up you and your DP need to get a bit more organised.

Ah forget the wash the floor every day bollocks.

Just keep doing your best. 💐

I guess it does just depend on if you’re taking the piss or are genuinely struggling to keep on top of things. It’s all about how you view your nanny and if you’re taking them for granted (which I don’t think you are).

We have a nanny. We both work full time and have 3 primary aged kids. I’m in the senior leadership team so extremely full on. DH is self employed and works a lot but has a bit more flexibility than me. Mornings feel like a battle to get through with constantly herding three young kids through getting up, eating, dressing and out the door with all the various stuff they need.

Sometimes the kitchen is a mess, with plates left on the side, butter out etc. Sometimes the front room is left in a state from all the crap they trail around with them and we’ve not had chance to pick up. Sometimes DH does a total tidy/ clean/ hoover etc if he’s working from home or has come back in the day, sometimes he doesn’t have chance to. I am usually working from home and will spend my lunchtime doing a scramble clean so I can make sure I fit in a run. Sometimes I might not get it all done and our nanny comes back with the kids and I come out of my office and apologise for it being untidy and I quickly do it all in between work calls.

The rambling point I’m trying to make is with regards to your nanny, I’m sure you don’t do it to take the piss and a quick convo would ease your anxiety over this and if - IF - she feels put out, would hopefully let her know you don’t take her for granted.

The main point of the post was to the vibe of how you and/ or your DH are not doing at good enough job keeping top of everything you have to do. Largely to just say life can be bloody hard and it’s so simple to just do X, Y, Z to keep on top of things. Some mornings I’m just too bloody knackered already, and it’s as simple as that.

I’m definitely not taking the piss. I’m anal about paying on time, getting back home in time so she can leave, I offered her more money a while a go if she might be able to do a bit of cleaning too but she declined saying she’d be too busy looking after the baby

I had a quick chat with her about it this eve when I got in. She seemed fine about everything and told me not to worry and that she knows we’re busy. Still, I can’t be sure whether she’s just saying that to be ‘nice’ so I’ve taken lots of things on board from this thread

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Yes.

This thread is making me so grateful for the nannies we have had! I do nothing in my house from Monday to Friday but I have always had a wonderful nanny who does all the kids’ laundry, tidies, keeps the kitchen from becoming a biohazard… I have a cleaner once a week but the nanny always maintains it. I have always kept really open lines of communication though… maybe that helps? If you are feeling uncomfortable, I would definitely talk to your nanny? You just need an arrangement that everyone is comfortable with. Our nannies have always tried to save me from myself! I was stressing over the state of my cupboards, joking about how I couldn’t go in there anymore because it was such a mess… I came home to find that the nanny had cleared the entire floor space and put bags, scarfs and clothes into piles for me to sort out - she then offered to sell stuff for me or do a tip run… so grateful to her.

As an aside, when our nanny wasn’t working for a while during the pandemic, I asked her how often I had to sweep the kitchen floor… she laughed her socks off at my reaction when she told me it was an everyday job when you have small children… 😂

LorelaiVictoriaGilmore How embarrassing that you can't perform basic adult functions but seem to think it's cute.

Surely you are adult enough to know that you simply sweep a floor when it's not clean...

The thing is, you need a cleaner or a housekeeper nanny, otherwise you will be cleaning for your nanny!

Who are these people that can't perform basic functions in their own homes? I work full time, as does my husband, we have a child, and have a cleaner for 2 hours every other week - which is a massive luxury for us. we still sweep the floors daily, Hoover every other day, do all washing up / cleaning bathrooms and toilets, the house is always tidy ish and if it isn't its only us that has to live in it. How embarrassing that you can't even sweep your floors when they're dirty!!

However. Mopping daily? Fuck that.

Imagine going to your office and your desk and surroundings are messy and dirty - this is how the nanny would feel. If you want her to add cleaning to her responsibilities then you could always discuss paying her for cleaning on top,

This is no reflection against you as many people I know say they don’t have time to clean and do this and that but there’s always time! There’s always time to quickly wipe surfaces, anti bac, tidy away, empty the dishwasher, it’s just about upping your game slightly.

As mums we are exhausted human beings and it’s all part of it. I know I’m ocd though and love a clean and tidy house - it’s good for my head too.

I always think a house should be ready for visitors ❤️

You definitely need to leave the kitchen clean, it’s pretty revolting to expect the Nanny to be feeding your children in a mess, or having to clear up your mess before she does her job. That’s pretty minging IMO

Sounds like your DH needs to up his game. Absolutely no excuse to be lazy.

We have a nanny and three kids, two at home. I am visiting a nursery today - partly that's wanting to prepare them for school nursery, but it's also a reflection of how difficult it can be to maintain a home environment for small children.

We've done it for years, but the sheer amount of food dropped from trays, detritus from chewed books and slips on hard tiles is starting to be depressing and we just don't have time to clean up around our nanny as we would like to. The kids are a full-time job.

I think take it easy on yourself, but also keep an eye on what is possible. And yes, get your OH to step up.

Just thinking about this and I realised that when it came to managing childcare at home, what made it click for me was giving up on the home I had before. Fancy cooking equipment cluttering the kitchen surfaces - gone into store. Too many clothes so drawers didn't fit - given away. Pretty things on reachable shelves - shelves emptied.

There is a reason MN is all about the ruthless organisation, and although it took me a long time to get it and my husband never will, changing your environment can also help.