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Original poster

Why do I hate work so much? Is this normal?

34 replies

cherrytreelanecherry · 27/09/2022 13:14

I hate the content of the job. I genuinely believe it is a pointless bullshit job which adds no value to anything or anyone.

I spend my time doing tasks which are apparently very important and urgent and need to be done RIGHT NOW - but then nobody pays any attention to what’s been done. Sometimes it even turns out that another team has done the same thing from a slightly different perspective.

I hate all my colleagues and the passive aggressive, backstabbing culture.

The only thing I like is the pay. I honestly get nothing else from it at all.

I’ve been in this career 14 years and always disliked it but the current job is one of the worst.

Anyone else been in this situation and how did you pull yourself back from it? It is at the point now where it is really affecting my mental health.

OP posts:

XelaM · 27/09/2022 13:20

OP I am so with you and actually just handed in my notice whilst still looking gor another job 🥶as I just hated mine so much

Original poster

cherrytreelanecherry · 27/09/2022 13:27

XelaM · 27/09/2022 13:20

OP I am so with you and actually just handed in my notice whilst still looking gor another job 🥶as I just hated mine so much

I so desperately wish I could do this but we can’t afford it right now. I think my husband is worried I might crack one day and just resign anyway 😂

How does it feel? Must be amazing to know you’re leaving.

OP posts:

Freakingflies · 27/09/2022 13:27

I’m with you too! Absolutely loathe my job, and can’t escape the feeling that it’s all just so pointless. I know it is also got to the stage of affecting my mental health.

The only reason I’m still there is there is a huge degree of flexibility but I’m at the stage now where I just cant bring myself to believe it’s worthwhile.

Would love to know how other people have managed to turn things around because I just feel stuck at the moment

Bestcatmum · 27/09/2022 13:28

No it isn't normal, I love my NHS job. I've been here 3 years am constantly challenged and get on with everyone.
That can't be said for my previous jobs of which I've like one.

EmmaH2022 · 27/09/2022 13:30

Depends what you do but I find most jobs are like this. I don't think it's weird to hate work at all.

Starfreeze · 27/09/2022 13:31

You need a plan to move to another career.
What resources do you have? What are your transferable skills? Can you afford to retrain? Can you afford a pay cut?

Map it all out, research your options and make a plan

rainbowandglitter · 27/09/2022 13:32

It's not normal for me. I absolutely love my job and always have.

QueSyrahSyrah · 27/09/2022 13:37

I don't think it's necessarily normal to hate all of it. I hate aspects of my job, but overall I enjoy it, but a lot of that has come with moving up in the company and gaining more understanding of the results of certain things that previously seemed fairly pointless.

If you hate every minute of it then it's time for a change.

TangoWhiskyAlphaTango · 27/09/2022 13:45

I have a good job in the NHS, lovely team and as a nurse it isnt as stressful as many other experience. Problem I have is I just never want to be at work. I don't let it show day to day but I love my days off so much, I cannot wait to retire and will hopefully be going at 60.

Redqueenheart · 27/09/2022 13:50

I am at the same stage. I hate working in office type jobs with constant meetings, jargon and pointless tasks. I have completely checked out.

Job hunting as we speak for a part-time role to get out of it...

Life is too short for this.

InThatCaseCanIHaveARaise · 27/09/2022 13:52

I really feel for you I’d hate to hate my job as so much time is spent there. I’ve had the occasional colleague that has got on my nerves but in 33 years of working I’ve always really liked what I’ve done. 6 different roles for the first company I worked for over 15 years and 18 years where I am now in 5 different posts.

Speedweed · 27/09/2022 14:07

I feel the same, and I have a bullshit job too. I found working remotely helped a lot, but I watch colleagues striving and backstabbing in their jobs and internally laugh at them. Also planning my finances so I can retire asap. And watching the film Office Space regularly. Other than that I smile and do the work.

Minikievs · 27/09/2022 14:11

I find people who love their jobs far more abnormal tbh.
Those people who win the lottery and blather on about how they're going to carry on working as they love it so much.....it's madness!!!
You wouldn't see me for dust

Farmageddon · 27/09/2022 14:41

You're not unusual OP, I think a lot of us are in this situation. The problem is many jobs are just kind of bullshit really, and not very meaningful, don't bring much fulfillment etc. Which is difficult because we spend most of our day doing them.
Some people are lucky and have jobs they adore, and others can switch off a bit and not care that one third of their day is spend doing something fairly useless, but many of us find it a bit soul destroying.

You could try looking for something else, or downsizing your life a bit so you don't need to work as many hours.

ThisShipIsSinking · 27/09/2022 14:58

Most people are conditioned to just get on with it and never really give a second thought to an alternative way of living. I think its a shame how we celebrate a work culture that exhausts and depresses the hell out of alot of us.
l work part time and live a simp!e way of life, this suits me much better, life is more meaningful than trying to compete in a fake false enviroment l have no desire to belong.

Original poster

cherrytreelanecherry · 27/09/2022 15:13

It’s embarrassing to admit but I actually already only work three days per week 🙊 Although in practice I often end up working on at least one of my days off so it turns into four.

OP posts:

EmmaH2022 · 27/09/2022 15:22

cherrytreelanecherry · 27/09/2022 15:13

It’s embarrassing to admit but I actually already only work three days per week 🙊 Although in practice I often end up working on at least one of my days off so it turns into four.

I don’t think badly of that at all. It is still really hard when you hate it.

Puddington · 27/09/2022 15:47

I'm exactly the same OP, even down to only working three days a week! The job is super flexible with great management and nice colleagues, on paper it's something I can leave at the door and not stress about, and I even recently got trained on something I enjoy which makes the job easier... but I just hate hate hate working and resent having to spend time at a job. I could literally retire tomorrow and not get "bored" for the next 50 years. This is probably the easiest job I'll ever have and I still dread it. It's not really about the job, I just despise working.

Original poster

cherrytreelanecherry · 27/09/2022 15:58

So it seems there are two schools of thought:

Working is just a bit shit
If you hate your job this much you need to find a better one

Not sure which camp I’m in. Right now I want to write my letter of resignation but maybe no other jobs are any better.

OP posts:

MintJulia · 27/09/2022 16:04

Op, that level of misery is not good for you. Stress can lead to or exacerbate all sorts of physical illnesses.

At the very least, look at retraining on the days you do not work. Formulate some sort of plan to move to something else. You could be working until you are 68, don't waste your life being miserable.

Do something about it.

Farmageddon · 27/09/2022 16:22

Given that you work 3 days a week, what is the rest of your life like? Are you happy with other things in your life?

I ask because you could reframe your thinking a bit and just see work as a means to pay for the things you do really enjoy. It obviously doesn't make every day in work wonderful, but it means you get to look forward to nicer stuff when you are not working. Maybe a new hobby, or meet-up, or organise something exciting for after Christmas when most people are depressed anyway. It's just a nice distraction really.

A good friend of mine is in a job he hates, but has lovely holidays abroad every year. He spends ages planning them, and really enjoys the 'looking forward to it' bit. I think it really helps his day to day to have a mental escape.

Also, make sure you are not taking too much work home with you. Many people I know doing compressed hours do that, and end up doing 4 or 5 days work when they are not paid for it. Madness.

Original poster

cherrytreelanecherry · 27/09/2022 16:40

Farmageddon · 27/09/2022 16:22

Given that you work 3 days a week, what is the rest of your life like? Are you happy with other things in your life?

Also, make sure you are not taking too much work home with you. Many people I know doing compressed hours do that, and end up doing 4 or 5 days work when they are not paid for it. Madness.

This is a really interesting point, and essentially a strategy I’ve been trying for the past couple of years.

Honestly I love the rest of my life! And therefore I’d been trying to see work as purely transactional rather than looking to it for any sort of fulfilment . But it’s still a large enough part of my life that it’s really getting me down.

OP posts:

Carlycat · 27/09/2022 16:41

I hated my job as an ICU nurse. But it paid my mortgage, decent holidays and a reasonable pension. I stuck it out and retired at 55

Carlycat · 27/09/2022 16:43

And it s a means to an end. People who love their job are in my experience very rare

thedevilinablackdress · 27/09/2022 16:48

Stop working on your day off! That won't be helping.

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