My friend hasn't paid me for her ticket to an event we're going to, I feel awkward about reminding her!

[Wisteriabloom]

She lives a distance away, so we don't see each other day-to-day, just meet up 3 or 4 times a year.

We decided to book, in between our two birthdays for a day-trip to a castle, wine-tasting & dinner. I checked she was happy with the price, (£50 per ticket), she said she yes, but could she pay me by direct transfer the following week when she got paid. This was about a month ago. She's very reliable and quick with payments, we've got each other's details. I said that was fine and booked.

She still hasn't paid me though! 🤔 I'm wondering if she forgotten, or intending to pay me on the day (she hasn't said that though). I'm thinking I should message and remind her, as if she doesn't pay me on the day that will be more awkward! If it was £10 or £20 I might let it go, but this is £50! Interested to know what some of you would do, thank you!

What sort of friend takes informal loans from a friend, so unfair!!

I think I’m the only one who feels sorry for your friend, she’s probably very embarrassed that she hasn’t had the money to give you yet. We are in a cost of living crisis so some may be really feeling it. Of course she shouldn’t commit if she can’t really afford it though but might have mis-budgeted.

Well then she should've told OP as soon as she was able, so she could make other plans and maybe sell the tickets. Leaving OP in the lurch is not what a true friend would do.

“Which account details did I give you? I can’t see the transfer.”

Goodness me, I can't imagine any friendship where I'd even entertain suggesting this. You must have weird relationships!

She’s said she’ll pay her this weekend so this shows she’s struggled to pay but wants to, my friendships aren’t the type to approach it the way OP and most on this thread have.

Remind her.

Am in the nicest way learn to be more assertive.

Send a picture of a baseball with the words "Where's my **ing money ?"

I don't have any qualms about reminding friends if they owe me money and I don't mind if they remind me ( not that I ever need reminding 😇). People are so weird about money. If I forgot I owed a friend some money I would welcome them reminding me.

I wouldn't be that forgiving of your friend if she decided to drop out and wasn't telling you. That's shitty behavior.

SHe also said it last month though, I'm not so sure she will pay but hopefully I'm proved wrong!.

TBF She should feel embarrassed. She is being selfish and unkind. She is the one who is putting the OP in an awkward situation.

Just say hey, can't wait to get together soon!! Did you transfer me the money, I totally forgot to check doh! Sounds more lighthearted and less 'chasey' imo

If she hasn't paid by mid next week she's being a shitty friend.
I guess then you'd have to text again and just be more assertive. Sometimes along the lines of "hey, sorry to ve a pain, but I still haven't received the money. I honestly don't mind if you can't make it or have changed your mind, I'd be disappointed but I could really do with knowing as I'm a bit tight this month with 3 family Birthday gifts to get. Hope you're OK, let me know". Seems a nice message but gives her a get out if that's what she's after.

Sorry for typos I don't have my glasses on 🤣

What happened?

I’ve done this before - had a friend send me a reminder “hi, just a reminder, you haven’t paid me for x yet”. I felt bad for forgetting and putting her in that position but glad she reminded me.

Maybe your friend forgot last pay day and has now spent the money so has to wait for payday again. This time I wouldn’t leave it long to remind her. Just ask her on Mon/Tues (after she gets paid) so she can pay you before she forgets again and uses the money on something else. You’ve paid her share so nothing wrong with reminding her she owes you. You can always word it as “just checking if you sent it as I didn’t see it in my account”. Hopefully she will then pay up right away otherwise it would be awkward if you have to keep asking.

She'll have been paid now right? I'd send her a reminder tomorrow if nothing received.

Yes, the money was in my account first thing this morning, with a text to say she'd sent it! No mention of why she forgot last month, but at least she's paid and isn't cancelling on me.

Good news 😊

Good news indeed OP

Such good news - I paid for a ticket for an event for a friend of mine and the day before she said she couldn't make it but was sure I could offload the ticket to someone. ( She had not paid ) Never will I pay up front for her again. It's not the actual money in some senses -although it is really - - it is more just a bit disprespetcful to say you will pay and then when someone has sorted it out to just not do it. But that sounds different to your friend.

That's good news!