The strangest thing someone said to you that sticks in your mind

[JamesBondOO7]

Over 35 years ago a workmate of mine a bloke asked me why I was off the day before and I told him I went to a funeral of a relative.

As we talked he said his brother had died when they were both in their early 30's and then blurted out "I did not go to his funeral." (They both lived locally to the other) I asked him why not. He said, "he was dead he (his brother) would not of known.."

The guy was not joking and it has stuck in my mind since - the bloke was a good workmate we had laughs/chats but that made me feel uneasy and funny about him

I was standing next to my mother as my older sisters coffin was being lowered. A bit later as we turned to walk away she turned to me and said “I heard you sniggering” WTF?

Ok I wasn’t a big fan of my sister as she was very difficult. I asked my husband who had been standing the other side of me if I’d made any noise that could have sounded like sniggering. He said no of course not. My mother didn’t really like my sister either, but then she didn’t really like anyone or any of her children really.

She had form for this sort of thing. At my nieces wedding when the rolls Royce came to take them from the church to the reception she sniffed and said it was such a waste of money. Ok you might think it, but you don’t say it so anyone can overhear.

I haven't anything to add but just to say thank you everyone for cheering up my crap day. I've been giggling like mad at some of these.

Got into an empty lift with my DC who was around 6 months old in pushchair. An apparently able bodied man in the lift said to me "you should be taking the stairs" and pointed to some other random man in the lift "and you should be carrying the pushchair" (the man he pointed to was the same ethnicity as me, but we had never laid eyes in each other before)

A similar thing happened to me when my DD was a baby. My response was "and she never will if I don't teach her how to talk"

@pantsofshame - I had something similar.

Took DS out in his pram when he was a couple of months old, sat down on a bench. Bloke next to me said:

'People like you make me sick'

What?

'Bloody teen mums'

Erm...I'm 36.

'Single mums then'

Show him my wedding ring

'On fucking benefits'

We both work full time. I'm on mat leave

(No idea why I'm getting into this but I'm ornery at times).

'Well, I bet it's not even yours <derogatory term for travellers>'

I say, dear chap, kindly keep your opinions to yourself and depart henceforth*

*might have been swearier

We were clearing a derelict property we bought and there were multiple lawnmowers found. A neighbour walked past, introduced herself and said
'Where are the children?'.
'Oh, we don't have any children.'
'But I saw a buggy here last week?'
'Oh, you must have seen some of the many lawnmowers we found in the garden, all rusted and broken-hehe'
' Why are you denying having children- where are they???'
' We don't have any children, and we haven't had a buggy here- you must be mistaken!'

She was very insistent and almost implied I had hidden them somewhere.
It was very difficult, because unknown to this women, I had another failed round of IVF on weeks beforehand.

An ex neighbour asked me how I was after my kidney transplant. I said I've not had a kidney transplant to which she replied no need to be embarrassed about it! I see them around sometimes and wonder if they think I'm still looking well 😃

One I witnessed was a woman of East Asian heritage run up to a man also of East Asian heritage and blurt out “are you Japanese?!” He bewilderedly said “no, Korean” and the woman huffed and ran off. It was years ago and to this day I wonder what that was about.

Some years ago there were a lot of tensions between Japan & Korea with fallout between the peoples. She may have been after a ruck!

Oh I've remembered another one when I was about 8 months pregnant the lift was out of order getting back to my car at the top of it a multi-storey carpark at the train station.

I'd huffed my way up about 8 flights of stairs and a young, fit man was walking down them with a toddler.

On passing he said "you've got it easy now, just you wait and see how difficult it gets."

🤨

When I was in my early 20s, me and my friend were invited out to a seaside town of one of my other's friends. We are from a city an hour and half away so this man was probably the local weirdo.

This old guy started speaking to us both in a pub and all of a sudden turned around to my friend and said I can tell you're the classy one then turned to me finger pointed and you look like page three!

I was massively offended because from his tone, he meant it to be. I wasn't dressed like a hooker (not that it should matter if I did) I had a smart top on, it showed a tiny bit of cleavage but was really pretty, in a turquoise colour. In smart trousers and black sandals.

It just made me feel like I looked cheap and horrible. I don't even think that way about page 3, it was the tone the man used and because of my own insecurities, it worked.

Now in my 30s I'd tell the sad old twat to f off and stop perving.

Meeting my aunts friend at the bus stop with baby dd2. Aw never mind maybe a boy next time! No congratulations she is beautiful blah blah just condolences it wasn't a boy

I was visiting my mum with Dc1 when he was 5 weeks old. The door knocked and it was a newish neighbour so mum invited him in to introduce me.

Conversation went:
Him: Oho, look at this little chap! Congrats! How old?
Me: Ah thanks, he's 5 weeks now.
Him: [Looking me up and down] Woah! You're a fast worker, you must be crazy hehe.
Me: Uh, sorry, what?
Him: Having another so quickly! [Points emphatically to my remaining pregnancy bump, I didn't snap back into shape!)
Me: [Mortified] Oh! I'm, I'm not pregnant again! This is just the leftover bump from this one!
Him: Well I'd definitely be double checking my love because you look about 6 months gone to me! I'm not often wrong about these things you know!
Me: Er what? My baby is just there - he's FIVE WEEKS old 🙄
Him: Well you never know do you! I won't say I told you so if it turns out I'm right!

He left and me and mum were just 😲 for the longest time!

I was about 12, walking through our local shopping centre, and looking pretty dorky if that's even relevant. A 10-year-old scrote boy who I'd never seen before, and was coming the other way, said to me, "God save you, slag!"

I assume he and his friends had some kind of dare going as to who could be the rudest to a stranger. But I've never forgotten the random oddness of it. And a weird comment as I don't suppose he had much time for God!

what a terrible thing to say, but quite hilarious 😂

Sent out save the date cards for my upcoming wedding.
Get a call from my Auntie - why are you getting married on your birthday?
Me - we got engaged on my birthday 2 years ago and when we went to look at dates available at the venue we chose it was the only date available in the summer so we all (me, husband, event coordinator) decided it was meant to be.
Auntie - What about when you get divorced - your birthday will forever be ruined

When not if 🙄
Been married more than a decade now.

Too many over my lifetime (particularly relating to my disability) but here’s a standout when we were applying for a mortgage with the then Cheltenham & Gloucester:

Clerk: “Marital status?”
Us: “Married.”
Clerk (brightly): “To each other?”

I know about the difficult history of Korea and Japan but it didn’t seem like the woman was looking for an argument about that. I have no idea if she herself was of Japanese or Korean heritage. The woman was young and professionally dressed and looked a little flustered as she ran up to him. He was an older man carrying some shopping. It was almost like she was specifically sent to find a Japanese person on an English high street with no other descriptor and was frustrated he wasn’t. It was really odd!

I think the most likely situation would be that she was Japanese and either only recently moved here or just not lived in an area with many other Japanese people - and was excited at the thought of bumping into someone she could maybe speak to in her own language? Then disappointed when he was Korean.

In my late teens I met up with a group of friends, and there was a guy there I’d never met before. I thought he was quite dishy. He introduced himself as “Hi, I’m Bob, the granny killer.” Okaaay.

Later on one of the others explained that he had indeed killed his grandmother by cycling fast down a hill and colliding with her when he was a young kid.

I was about 17/18 and I remember my friends mum saying I was really lucky I had my own house. The only reason I had it was because my dad had died when I was 14 and my mum when I was 16 and I had stayed there and taken it over, it wasn't exactly through choice. I was young, still at school, suddenly had a house, a dog etc, a real grown up life, I wouldn't exactly call it lucky! I wouldn't be where I am today with my own bought house ect if it hadn't happened but it really made me think how other people seen my situation. I know she didn't mean it how it sounded, she's lovely and I'm one of the few friends that she actually liked 😆 but it really made me think and I've never forgotten it.

Random lady in the supermarket commented that my children didn't look anything like each other and went on to say that they probably didn't have the same dad, then just strolled off up the isle leaving me with my chin on the floor. (They do have the same dad)

We were looking at various mortgage providers for our first home after renting for years and I’d made an appointment at a small local building society.
DH had been called into work at short notice so I went alone. For context, I was in my thirties, main wage earner (with a large cash deposit from life savings) and had dressed smartly and was visibly pregnant with first dc. The utter bitch of a woman managed to reduce me to tears by talking to me as though I was five and insinuating that we were irresponsible and hadn’t thought hard enough about how we would afford a mortgage.
If I hadn’t been full of pg hormones I’d have ripped her a new one.

I didn't go to my brothers funeral because I just couldn't as I was struggling. It's not weird. It's extreme grief!

I know about the difficult history of Korea and Japan but it didn’t seem like the woman was looking for an argument about that. I have no idea if she herself was of Japanese or Korean heritage. The woman was young and professionally dressed and looked a little flustered as she ran up to him. He was an older man carrying some shopping. It was almost like she was specifically sent to find a Japanese person on an English high street with no other descriptor and was frustrated he wasn’t. It was really odd!

Either a translation, a bad treasure hunt or a really crap Apprentice task then 😂

Lol!

Well I guess in a way she's right - we're all just extra skin really!