Why do men do this.

[Bestcatmum]

Why do men wander about like a fart in a trance completely and totally spacially unaware.
I've lost count of the times a man has backed right into me, stepped back and right into me, forced me off the pavement because I am apparently invisible and just walked into me in the supermarket because he wasn't paying attention. It really makes me fume. Women hardly do this, they are aware of everyone around them.
Today a group of three men in their 60's were laughing and joking and heading right for me on the pavement and about one second before on of them crashed into me I yelled STOP at the top of my voice (I am completely shameless).
He was so shocked he staggered about on the kerb and fell into the road (no cars around). He looked at me astonished as if I had just teleported in front of him.
I didn't say sorry, I just went on my way.

A poster a few years back pointed this out and once I had read it, I could not unsee this on the trains. Also experienced this on planes and have pushed my leg against the invading leg and have been met by staring or an apology.

I recently experienced the beer drinking arm splayed across my vision at the cricket, along with the splayed leg invading my leg space ... he was completely oblivious to this and seemed confused when I gently pushed his arm out of my vision.

I think it's similar to the phenomenon of what I call "loose men" in a supermarket. A man, usually over 50 (as am I, so not ageist), hanging around in the aisles, gazing vacantly at the shelves. There's an associated woman around somewhere (I've noticed gay couples tend to shop together), but until it comes to the checkout or driving home, he's essentially redundant.

My DH's aunt and uncle are like this, she doesn't drive so needs him there but he is allowed no input into what goes in the trolley so he's at a loose end until she's finished.

Love your "STOP!"approach OP!
Yes, this is definitely a thing IME although I've rarely experienced it outside of London (presumably because pavement space isn't at such a premium in the shires...). I'm fairly solidly built, so used to also indulge in a bit of Patriarchy Chicken some moons ago when I spent a lot of time pounding the streets of London. It was never women who went into me and the men who did were usually shocked.
(Some) men do it to each other though too. My F was all about expressing his dominance and would move out of the way for no one. He was quite a unit, so it rarely didn't go his way. I remember one day as a child walking along Kensington High Street with him. A man was aggressively coming towards us along the pavement on inline skates with a street hockey stick, people jumping out of his way. Not Dad though. He squared himself and carried on striding down the road. When the bloke hit him it was like a comedy sketch: he hit Dad's shoulder, his legs went up in the air and he fell flat on his back. The hockey man was shocked and outraged Dad had walked into him, but very quickly realised he needed to back down and slunk away. I hated all the Alpha crap my F used to pull, but on this occasion it was an awesome sight to behold.

Fart in a trance exactly describes "loose men", that,'s why I thought it was apt.

😈

Brilliant. I'm going to do this.

One time I got on the train and 3 very oblivious people were taking up the seats where bikes go. the only place bikes are allowed on the train. There were tonnes of seats elsewhere in the train. I GLARED at them. I said loudly "You're not supposed to be here. You can sit somewhere else but I can't put my bike anywhere else" They ignored me. So flipping rude & selfish. The train gets moving & I'm struggling not to have my heavy bike fall on these selfish people. Suddenly one of them, who I think had special needs, moves aside to give me space & beckons me to sit down. We had a chat. The other people remained oblivious for next half hour.

The nice person who moved aside was a scruffy young man.
The two people who remained oblivious throughout were middle aged well-dressed WOMEN.

But heyho, stick with your "only men are oblivious" narrative. Enjoy as you like.

I think there's a massive difference between obliviousness and expecting-women-and-other-people to move. Broadly, I'd agree that women are far more likely to be oblivious - get on train then promptly stop moving, or not notice that their bags are taking up space or fuss around with their purse only AFTER everything has been rung up and there's a massive queue etc.

What OP and others on this thread are talking about is the way men will be perfectly aware that there are women in front of them, but will not even consider that they should move because they instinctively expect the women to move. In most cases, they aren't even aware of this expectation. I suspect that they do it to each other too and that there's some complicated hierarchy for men walking towards each other that's based on size/race/age/dress/something else etc that they're not even aware they're doing.

To take my point above further, when I was pregnant - I got smacked into on the pavement a LOT.

But I also noticed that if someone on a bus or train was going to give me a seat, it was FAR more likely to be a (very) young man.

They're different points.

Do they though? Or have you just met bad mannered people?

I had a similar thing the other week. Group of men in front me walking, all fine, then all decided to stop abruptly in the middle of the path deciding on whether or not to go into the pub. A few of them nearly walked back into me. They apologised with a "sorry luv" Having to awkwardly walking through them. No awareness. It's annoying and has happened more times than I can count

This is it exactly.
Most men just won’t move out of your way if you are a woman (or perhaps even a man significantly smaller / weaker than they are)
However if you are not looking out, they will walk round you.
so true.
Most just expect you to move first. It’s as simple as that.

@O11 that's such a cop out. Anyone disagreeing with an anti man stance or experience gets told they have internalised misogyny
No, not in this case. I've actively gone to try this but find in almost all cases they move first and are very nice about it.
Sorry to disappoint

I have done a lot of walking around busy London, and it's not a male / female thing.

That said, I've never had a woman put themselves on a collision course deliberately to provoke a confrontation, whereas I've had 2 men do that. The first one barged me on a narrow path where I couldn't move over if I had wanted to as there was a wall. I left it because he was with his girlfriend and I was in a hurry. The second arsehole crossed most of the way over a wide pavement to get in my way. I stood my ground and he had to go around me. He walked off telling me I had no manners and called me a cunt. I carried on, giving him the finger behind me. I'd rather things didn't escalate, but I am not going to be bullied and, after the first incident, I am prepared for that to happen.

I was once standing on a wide and empty pavement looking up directions on my phone. I’d deliberately moved to the side just in case, but a male runner decided to alter his course deliberately to barge into me.

The weird thing here is 'a male runner' they're all women here with water bottle with a handle and phone and ear plugs. Completely oblivious to anyone else as they barge along.

Inklingpot
I was stood at the side of a wide pavement last summer, texting someone to confirm I had posted an urgent letter for them. A man scraped the rough fibreglass kayak he was dragging on a trailer behind him right across the back of my bare legs. When I cried out in pain/surprise he looked round and paused, but in a harassed manner. I said what he had done and he first wanted me to show him my injuries, implying I was lying, then told me I should look where I was going. I crossly said I had been standing still and he started swearing at me. Really shook me up.