Where do you find groups to possibly make friends?

[Enko]

I am in my early 50s and Ive realised recently that my friend circle is very small. A mixture of my kids getting old/adults and school mum's friendships have moved on. My having been in education for the last 3 years so not had a lot of outside time, covid and lockdown and us moving away from the town we lived in for 12 years 3 years ago.

I have good friends I speak with and spend time when able but they are a minimum of 30 mins away and some in other countries. (I am not British by birth)

So I often see " join a group" and Whilst I am willing to do that. I struggle to find anywhere. I don't have a lot of money so expensive groups to join to learn x is hard. I work Monday to Friday so I need evening groups and I am just struggling.

I have gone to a crochet/ knitting group for the last 3 years in our previous town but it has recently closed down. I have not had luck finding one in my area. I am not interested in book groups as frankly once I go back into studies in October my reading will once again focus on that topic.

I would like to meet people who will be welcoming. I am up for trying new things but I don't have £100's to spend on a course. I used to do lots of craft-based courses but I never really managed to make many friends that way. Did some amazing crafts though :)

Ive looked at our local library but not seen much (it is also very new so a chance that will come it has not been open long) I AM considering a local church but the closest one is very much a "let's get God points" church and I know from previous experience I am not a great fit in those. There is an evangelist church close to us I am considering come September (no services in August) but it is a bit complex as my religion is Lutheran protestant. Also, I have previously found that getting included in churches takes a long time. I will say some of the people I still drive to see in our previous church are from my previous church group.

I don't want to start a group before people suggest this. I did this with the group we have just closed down and it wasn't successful.

Where do people look and how did you go about this? I have looked on

meetup.com
Local library
Local bookshop
local church notice board
crochet forums with local areas
Local sewing shop (all sewing groups and Im not up for that)

When I have found groups they are often daytime too and I simply can't do daytime.

Beginners to Runners are very popular groups for all abilities, but if running is not your thing how about walking?

I was going to suggest a walking group. I would definitely try a few local churches. How about some volunteering?

Have you tried asking on your local town’s Facebook group what clubs/societies there are?

How about:
Choir
Dancing (something like Salsa or Jive)
Badminton/Tennis (the Lawn Tennis Association does a ‘Beginner to Player’ course at many clubs which isn’t expensive and often in the evening at your local club, you can borrow a racket)
WI (Women’s Institute
Townswomen’s Guild
Lions Club
Soroptomist UK
Walking (weekends)

Sorry no running/walking type thing I have my reasons there I am open to exercise classes and I have looked at a yoga group in the area but its full at the moment.

What type of volunteering is there in evenings and where would I even look?

Same position - just moved over an hour and half away from where we used to live. Best friend of decades has for whatever reason, decided that friendship
ia no more - it was always a wax and wane thing over the decades, so not entirely surprising.
So I’m going to try the U3A (£10ish for a year plus minimal course fees) and possibly, if I can find one without a waiting list, the WI. Add in joining the local rubbish collection/support the village hall things, and I might get to know some new people and learn some new skills.
New start, new season, new friendship groups?

I do volunteer work in a small museum as a way, in part, to make friends. It hasn't quite worked, as the nature of the guiding means you're always on your own and always with same very small number of people, sometimes only me, on the volunteer day at the start and end of the shift.

I still enjoy it very much, but imagine that to stand the best chance of making friends, you need to be with a group you're with for the whole of the activity. Walking groups sound good for this.

Good luck, Enko

Meet up

Meet up

The dating app bumble has a friends section. Once you get past feeling like a bit of a loser, you can meet some really nice people on there.

I found exercise rubbish for making friends. And the choir was so cliquey ☹️ Volunteering has kinda helped.

It’s hard. Walking or art might be good. Something where people chat.

WI is brilliant. Very welcoming to new members and always starts around 7pm.

Some groups can be cliquey, I actually skipped a yoga class after my initial 3 months fees because of this. I was wanted as part of the clique but they had a spin off book club and also met for lunch in every week, it was too intense.

Try meet up but also you can find groups on Facebook. I belong to a hiking group on both. I know you said no walking but there must be other interests you have on both platforms.

volunteering is very good as you all have a common interest.

You need zn activity where you can chat as you do it so most exercise classes or dports often aren't that great - unless people already have an established routine of socialising after the class.

I would suggest walking or volunteering.

Packing food hampers or something similar might be good as you can talk while you do that. A food bank or Christmas hamper project (obviously later in the year) might work well.

Also, something like being on the committee for something like a Parish Magazine, summer fair, Christmas parade etc could work - if you have any of them. Our community groups are always looking for helpers and they seem to do a lot of pub meetings to make their plans.

I am joining a cycling group for women from Next spring. It is On a Monday evening but I cannot go until ds stops going to his activity.

I would also go and do one morning weekly in a charity shop but I have no spare time ..... Though I may suggest alternate weeks if they will have me.

Are there any charity shops in your area you could volunteer at? They are always crying out for helpers.

Volunteer at your local Cubs/Scouts/Brownies/Guides etc?

Have you got a local WEA? I've met lots of interesting people at mine. Courses cover all sorts of subjects, there's usual at least one evening course and they do a mix of hobby and vocational stuff. They also run quite a lot online.

WI sounds like a good one to try. It's pot luck on who's in any group but at least if you're doing something interesting it's worth going and friendship is a bonus.

I have the opposite issue of being free in school hours but no social options for women of my age as they're either working or wrapped up with younger children.

Volunteering is a great idea. Most committed meet in the evening.
I know someone who is in charge of wardrobe for a amateur theatre group. There may be other ways to get involved in theatre groups without acting eg front of house, props etc.

Games groups? My local library has a mah Jong group although it is during the day.

Id enquire at the local CAB and see what there is.
Zonta is a group aimed at embracing and empowering women. It is an international organisation. There may be a chapter near where you live.

My WI group is amazing with lots of off shoot groups such as reading group, walking group and craft group. The majority of women are still working but I've made friends with women of all ages there.

I've been in a similar position, so wish you good luck in finding a wider circle of friends. Just wondering, though, whether there might just be a touch of

www.nlpschool.com/games-people-play-yes-but-game/

Rock Choir - although it is £25 a month - evenings and really welcoming.

Volunteer at parkrun on a Saturday morning and/or Junior parkrun on a Sunday. Don’t need to be a runner. They would welcome a non running volunteer with open arms.

I live in the SE. I work Monday to Friday this is why I want to do something in the evenings. I don't have the daytime hours.

I do have friends and I belong to many online communities. I would like to meet some local people.

Short off day volunteering at the weekend I can't see where I can volunteer. I am not against volunteering I've done plenty in my past but I also need to have time with my family and ensure there is time for my studies and work. So I am reluctant to use a weekend day for this right now. Perhaps in 3 years time when my studies are over.

I know many wont get this but I am one of those people who do not enjoy walking/ hiking/ cycling/running. Its just not my thing. I go to the gym to keep fit

I looked at yoga classes and badminton as suggested they are a minimum of £20 a session. As again I live in the SE.

I've looked at local adult education courses in the evening they do Spanish Italian. Pottery and introduction to counselling. With my current studies (in counselling) new languages and introduction to counselling are out and the pottery class is full ...

I would love a book club and have belonged in the past but counselling studies take over and I know I won't manage reading anything but relevant to studies books (I am going into my 4th year)

I'd like a games night club. There is one currently near by but it's booked full for the next 3 months. The closest WI Hall does 1 monthly meeting and the rest is day time meet ups. I will look at what their next talk is about. Its not up yet.

I'd like a social club or a discussion club. The only I can find in my area are for 20-30 year olds or 30 to 40 year olds. I would be open for different craft workshops even craft I don't currently know much about. I am open to the idea of talks as I enjoy learning random local stuff. I'd love a card club. And I have looked at the local bridge club. They however do not have returning to bridge events suggesting you take their beginner classes. I know I am way past their beginner classes as my sil recently did them. And I had a look at her notes. I am a decent player I just need a few games to get back on track. I have made contact to see if they could pair me with someone for a duplicate that would be OK with my returning to play they basically said no.

I would be open for other card games but not seen anything in the area.

I have not found meet up has a lot for the area I am in (I do not live in the sticks) oddly before we DID live in the sticks and I found far more local stuff than I do in a larger town.

I am aware I sound a bit like I am soothing you all down and I do apologise for that. I just really need evening things and in my local area that appears difficult. I also am aware of how much my studies have taken over but long term I know this will be good for me (I am training to become a psychotherapist) so it may be I need to suck it up for a otber 3 yeaes.

I had hoped this post would come up with some suggestions I had not already considered
I will look at
Townswomen’s Guild
Lions Club
Soroptomist UK

As suggested above. I had not heard of 2 of thise. I had a glance at soroptomist UK last night but got a bit confused so decided to look closer today (their website was behaving very weird)

@FinallyHere. Omg that made me laugh so hard. My studies are in Transactional analysis. Aka Eric Berne the man who wrote the book. "The games people play"

No I don't think I am playing the "yes but" game. I am being realistic in how much time I have. I want evenings not day times. Where we lived before there was a lot. In this larger town it seems less.

Do you play a musical instrument? Local orchestras or brass/woodwind groups often welcome adults who may only have a basic grasp of how to play and it's a very sociable activity!