What do you do when you're unwell and nobody can help with DC?

[ovhalph]

My DC has special needs.

I came to visit my grandmother this weekend and unexpectedly fell ill last night.

My body and joints ache. High temperature. Headache. Confusion, really have to concentrate to write this. I feel like my body will snap if I'm not careful physically.

I cry at the thought of moving off the bed or sofa. It's just like nothing I've ever experienced. Thought maybe Covid but negative

Problem is I can't drive back home (2 hours). And DC's dad won't help me unless I drive DC to him. We aren't together and he isn't great with DC.

My grandmother is really struggling with him. She won't admit it but it's pure hell. She's screaming at him etc. she is too old for this nonsense

My DC is profoundly disabled. And can't just sit and watch telly for example. He needs constant supervision and watching closely

What on earth do I do? Leaving my ex was clearly a mistake

Call the on call social worker at your usual county
Maybe they can arraNge to pick him up on a taxi with escort for emergency respite for few days?
They can bethe ones to speak to his dad
Whatever you do
Ask for urgent re assessment
And overnight respite

@Neverfullycharged

Literally, she was answering the question at the top with what she does which is just get on with it best as you can. Which is often how I deal with it. (Single parent to two disabled children. ) dose up on paracetamol and ibuprofen and decongestants do the minimum possible to keep them safe fed and watered. The other option is social services emergency foster care. Ex came over when I went off in an ambulance in the middle of the night but that turned out to be false alarm. And they were a bit older then and more safe themselves and mostly asleep.

If it is COVID I felt shit for 24 hours and poorly for a few more days, but the worst was 24 hours. (Previous dose of possible COVID, oxygen says of 92 but felt less ill than this recent dose [weirdly] and they were older at this point)

Your ex is a twat.

Muddle through as best you can, take as many meds you can and use any help you can.

I'm a foster carer and occasionally take children at short notice on respite care if a parent is in hospital etc. You may well have Covid. I felt like you plus high temperature took Covid test but negative. The next evening felt even worse took another test and was positive. DH, me, adult DS and foster son all positive within a week. A very nasty strain as we all felt crap for as bout 10 days. Today my first day being negative. Last night was first night I slept in 10 nights as every time I lay down I could not breathe so had to sit up overnight. Do you have a friend who would help? Could you ring ex and tell him how I'll you are?

@ovhalph omg my heart breaks for you, your situation sounds identical to mine,i too barely sleep and have a on the go 24 hours a day child, i too have no help.id contact Social Work disabilities, they will help, you need to get better or you'll get further run down. I always think what will happen to my poor boy if i died from sheer exhaustion of looking after him.if i could help you i would, honest to god,hope you're okxxx

We have a similar child (teenager). We can't leave him with anyone else. Fortunately there are two of us although he needs 2:1 a lot of the time. If we couldn't manage then SS have said they would have to find somewhere although he couldn't go to ordinary foster care and there is nothing specialist in County. Those who say you would have to manage etc have no understanding of what it is like.