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Original poster

My dad has been diagnosed with prostate cancer

32 replies

YoSofi · 07/08/2022 11:16

My lovely dad was diagnosed on Friday.

He’s 61, very fit and active and went to the doctors for something unrelated. The doctor took bloods and it was found that way - I’m not sure what the score was but after biopsies he’s been given a Gleason score of 7 and opted for removal but it can’t be done until November.

I am so scared and keep going between thinking he’ll be ok to being terrified that he’s going to die.

Ive been awake since 4am, I’ve got to tell my son when he is home later and I feel sick. They are incredibly close and my son is very anxious so I know he will expect the worst.

Does anyone have any positive stories please?

OP posts:
Pollydon · 07/08/2022 11:18

No experience but sending you 💐. As I understand it prostrate cancer is very treatable.

CityOfCake · 07/08/2022 11:20

My dad had it and lived for another 16 years And the majority of those years he was actually in remission x

HellaFitzgerald · 07/08/2022 11:21

OP, this might be of some comfort:

survival gradually increases from 91% in men aged 15-49 and peaks at 94% in 60-69 year olds;

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

General health
Original poster
YoSofi · 07/08/2022 11:22

Thank you, your comments have made me cry - I am very emotional!

Those statistics are very reassuring x

OP posts:
albairlanda · 07/08/2022 11:23

My dad was diagnosed in similar circumstances in September last year. His Gleason was 11 I think. He waited ages for his operation. Didn't happen until May this year. Took whole thing out. Gleason now 0.03 and he is in recovery which is going well. He's 75. The consultant he's under told him at diagnosis it's highly unlikely you'll die of this. Getting it in 60s/70s is very very rarely a death sentence. Sorry you're worried. I focused on what his consultant said re dad to manage my worries. X hope your dad ok x

mpsssm · 07/08/2022 11:28

Yesmy dad was diagnosed with a Gelason of 8 in May 2012.
His cancer was inoperable. He had 8 weeks of radiotherapy in October 2012.

He then went on hormone therapy until 2017, when it stopped working.

He was then put on abiterone (not sure if spelling!) And has been on it ever since. The consultant keeps playing with the dosage as it can affect liver function.

His cancer has spread to his lymph nodes now, but is contained within them.

In October 2021, they found something on his liver and thought the cancer had spread. I posted then about my fears. However another scan showed this was nothing.

My dad has had extreme exhaustion as a side effect of the treatment... Or so we thought... However, he has now been diagnosed with diabetes and since starting on insulin has a new lease of life.

In 2012 I remember buying father's Day cards for him and my then husband and crying thinking my daughter wouldn't remember her darking grandad.

Well he is still here, and my 12 is devoted to him and him to her. The drug he is currently on wasn't licensed when he has first diagnosed! Things seem to be moving quickly with research into this cancer.

switchoff1 · 07/08/2022 11:31

My dad had it a few years back early 60’s I would say as can’t quite remember when it was. He left it for a few years as it was stable (I couldn’t have done but he didn’t want the op) levels started to change so he had the operation and had it removed no need for chemo etc as it was all removed and hadn’t spread. Recovery took a while if he choose the operation it’s major surgery. Has issues with his bladder now and not being able to hold very well if he needs the loo, but it’s better than cancer I suppose. Believe he’s still ok and in remission

TheBigApple · 07/08/2022 15:34

I don't often post but wanted to send thoughts to you as we were in a similar place last year.

DDad diagnosed with March 2021 with Gleeson score of 8 in his early 70s. Operation and Radiotherapy undertaken before being given all clear. 6 month checks which try we live from one to the other. Has hormone injections 3 monthly and regular bloods for PSA levels which are now normal. He has a good quality of life and occasionally is tired but he is a great advert for how amazing the treatment is if caught early enough.

There is lots of hope as there are so many treatment options. Good luck Flowers

Toddlerteaplease · 07/08/2022 15:37

My best friends brother had a very aggressive form. I'm not sure if he had a full removal but he's absolutely fine now. He's got a soft of artificial sphincter, to stop incontinence. Which works very well. He's just gone on a road trip across America.

Oblomov22 · 07/08/2022 15:42

My step dad had it. It is the most common in men. He had the operation, pre covid, and has now been dismissed by consultant and will only now go for occasional checks.

CallmeAngelina · 07/08/2022 15:42

My dad was the same. Lived for 15 years after diagnosis in early 70s.

poorpaws · 07/08/2022 15:50

My neighbour was diagnosed many of years ago in his early 60s I think. He lived a very full life. He died at 85 (2 years ago) of something totally unrelated (heart attack). Try to keep positive Flowers

Outoutoutshout · 07/08/2022 16:02

My dad had prostate cancer about 15 years ago (in his late 50s). It was a late diagnosis but still operable and he didn't need chemo. It's often a slow growing cancer. I'd advise your dad to get advise and support from PCUK. I certainly wouldn't be worrying yet as it's often very treatable. My Dad is absolutely fine now. Still has annual blood tests but all is fine and no signs of it coming back.

Mellowyell292 · 07/08/2022 16:09

My Dad has been living with prostate cancer for 3 years now. You're more likely to die with it than of it. Lots of love to you OP, he'll be ok xx

ItsMutinyontheBunty · 07/08/2022 16:10

My Dad had it. He was about 60 I think. He had surgery first then radiotherapy. He went into remission but they monitored his bloods. Baring in mind his PSA was 30+ when they found it, when his bloods showed PSA as 0.4 a couple of years later , they treated him again (this time with experimental hormone therapy and then radiotherapy). 10 years oh he’s discharged from specialist care and the GP just monitors his bloods. It is a treatable cancer. I read somewhere more men die with prostate cancer than of prostate cancer (ie even if it’s not curable, many men live with it for years without it impacting on their overall health). I know it’s scary but many, many men have it and recover.

Cantthinkofadifferentname · 07/08/2022 16:14

How old is your son?
Do you really need to tell him? When your Dad goes into hospital can you just tell your son, his grandad needs a small operation?
I've always avoided telling minor children too much to avoid them worrying unnecessarily.
Hope your Dad gets well soon xx

TalbotAMan · 07/08/2022 16:19

We moved to this house 12 years ago. Retired next door neighbour told me he had had it and been treated. Not quite sure how old he is as he's a fireman and they get to retire early.

Anyway, he's still here.

(and still mowing the lawn with his extremely loud and smelly petrol mower every sunny weekend . . .)

Baconking · 07/08/2022 16:26

Cantthinkofadifferentname · 07/08/2022 16:14

How old is your son?
Do you really need to tell him? When your Dad goes into hospital can you just tell your son, his grandad needs a small operation?
I've always avoided telling minor children too much to avoid them worrying unnecessarily.
Hope your Dad gets well soon xx

I agree with this.

Children don't need to know the details of these things as it will only worry them.

I would hold off telling DS until dad is unwell or or having noticeable treatment

Bananarama21 · 07/08/2022 16:27

My df has prostate cancer its metaitized in his bones and the doctors suspect in his brain. He has alot of pain relief and is terminal however he has been terminal for the last 5 years. He had sepsis, pneumonia strokes but some how he's managed to pull through each time he's 75. There is hormone therapy available.

Original poster
YoSofi · 07/08/2022 17:48

Thank you so much for all of your comments I can’t tell you how much I appreciate every single one of them, and those that have had/have a loved one with the same diagnosis I wish them good health and a very long happy life.

My son is 13, without being too outing my dad is very close friends with a lot of the parents/grandparents of my sons school friends due to him having a business in the village we live in. Unless my dad tells absolute nobody, which is unfair to ask as he needs his business partners support and the support of his friends, it would be likely that my son would find out from a third party, or one of his friends mentioning something. I would rather not tell him at all, but feel it’s better coming from me than him hearing it through village chatter.

OP posts:
PaperMonster · 07/08/2022 19:18

I hope your dad recovers well x

My dad had it in 1999. He had treatment, retired in his early 70s and is 82 now xx

iRun2eatCake · 07/08/2022 19:28

My dad had his prostrate out. Was discovered in similar circumstances.

I work in theatre recovery and have recovered hundreds of men following this surgery.

Daisychainsandglitter · 07/08/2022 19:47

My uncle had prostate cancer and passed away earlier this year.
He had lived with it for about 15 years before he died from it.
My best wishes to your father

DMCWelshcakes · 07/08/2022 19:52

DDad was diagnosed aged 69. It had metastases in his bones & spine, was inoperable and his PSA was so high it was off the scale. He was given 18 months if he had chemo.

He's now 75, still leads a walking group every week, is still travelling the world and has been relandscaping his garden. His PSA is now 0.001 or something equally teeny and hes in remission. Other than getting a jab every 3 months and an increased propensity to cry at sad things on the telly , you'd never know he had it.

Diagnosis is a scary time, but the developments in treatment in the last 6 years alone have been freaking amazing and there's more to come.

Hang on in there and don't start booking any wakes just yet.

Buttercream22 · 07/08/2022 19:54

My dad was diagnosed just before the pandemic. He was 72 and very fit and healthy for his age, to look at him you'd think he was in his early 60s! He had hormone treatment for months then radiotherapy and has made a full recovery. That was two years ago xxx