What did you do on your wedding day to make it uniquely yours?

[NoEffingWay]

DP and I are getting married next year, and I'm a bit worried that it's all a bit generic 'nice' wedding.

I have toyed with various ideas but worry they are a bit twee, like having a glitter bar or an ice-cream van for dessert (though would still like ice-cream in my wedding dress!).

What did you do to make the day a bit different from the instagram weddings that all look the same?

Married my husband and invited the people I loved. Probably sounds like a twatty answer, but I worked in the wedding industry for years, and there really is nothing new or unique and that's fine.

We prioritised things we loved (like live music) and wouldn't have bothered with an ice cream van (which isn't that unusual) or a glitter bar (which sounds like hell to me). I tend to think that if you have to resort to crowdsourcing ideas like on this thread, then it's probably not that unique and it's probably not super meaningful to you as a couple. I really wouldn't worry about your day being "different". It probably won't be to outsiders and for you celebrating with a room full of people you love will be a far bigger stand out than an ice cream van.

made it about us, but not in an obnoxious way. I spent the morning with DH - we had a lovely breakfast and got a couples massage. Then went separate ways to get ready. Just spent as much of the day as possible with each other, celebrating each other and our relationship.

but we also got married in the days before instagram, so had no pressure there. But the best advice I got was that if you [the couple] have a good time everyone else will. So I made sure that we didn’t sweat any of the details on the day. Flowers not quite right? Oh well! Keep it all in perspective…

There’s plenty you can do to make it personal with a theme, personalised table names, extra expensive things like fireworks displays and ice cream vans etc but it will all have been done by someone somewhere.

The weddings that are enjoyed the most and remembered with the fondest memories are the ones where the guests have been considered properly and been well looked after. People care about how they feel on the day, not the things that amuse them for a couple of minutes. In turn, happy appreciative guests will create the atmosphere you want for your special day.

I got married in hospital 8 days before my husband died. The nurses made it pretty damn special and I’ll never forget it.

live for the moment, you don’t have to make your wedding unique just make your marriage special. I never got that chance

Two bands, the first was a trad ceili band at the drinks reception. It got everyone into the party mood. Maybe that’s not unusual though?

Get everyone drunk. It worked for us.

Oh god don’t be worried about things ‘not looking like an Instagram wedding’, it’s the least important of all things related to your wedding. Choose what you like, feed and water your guests, that’s all guests give a shit about.
I’ve been to many weddings, (as have most others!!), they’re not really unique other than the bride and groom.
sure they’ve all got twists but they’re really just variations of the same thing.
Do what you want!

Outing if any of our guests are reading but...

Teepees, sent a balloon into orbit with a camera, cake in shot. Bake off for dessert. Chocolate fountain, hog roast, free bar. 😉. Lawn games, fire pit with Marshmallows for roasting, sparklers and clubbing glow sticks for after dark. His and hers cocktails. Wanted a petting zoo but too much money...oh and I both wore trainers under our posh clothes. Disco teepee with a playing we picked specially. Homemade bouquet and flower pins (not real flowers, ones I had made.

Its been ten years now and friends still tell us how memorable it was!!

Didn’t have an evening do.

We had a photo table runner than was photos of us both throughout our lives and together.

Tables were names after places we had been.

We were still drinking in the bar at 4am....

Southend Sewage Treatment Facility.

I agree with this. Don't try to be different, do what makes you both happy/what YOU like. Your wedding day is about you and DH, not impressing other people.

We had a dance tune for our first dance that was a song that meant something to us and not a typical first dance song.
No speeches, no seating plans, no formalities except for cutting the cake and our first dance.
We just danced alllll night to the music we like 😁

I was pretty ill in the run up to our wedding (like I was told terminally) so threw myself into organising it which also included ours being a humanist wedding where DH & I write our own vows for the humanist ceremony including exchanging rings then we had the "legal bit" which we kept as brief as possible an hour later so our "actual wedding anniversary" was the same. We did it as a celebration of our love & included:

• handmade invitations on vintage hankies sent in shotgun cartridges to guests (made by me & my bridesmaids)
• we hid kazoos under the chairs for a song of "it must be love" & guests added their own kazoo chorus
• made a donations box for a cancer charity & stamped envelopes on their places asking for any change instead of giving favours "do us a favour" there was a poem I can't remember now
• arranged for BIL who was master of ceremonies to lead a rendition of "12 days of Christmas" where the 12 tables were the numbered chorus bits & had to stand up & sing their parts (it was 12th Dec) so hid song sheets under the table decorations for each table (DH didn't know) was so much fun during food lulls

The big thing I think worked really well was getting a picture of the wedding party in compromising situations & putting in frames explaining who they were ("meet your wedding party")then printed a picture of each guest & hung it on string under "hunt for yourself" as a talking point for when ppl arrived it broke the Ice really well, followed a theme (hunting/shooting country theme) & sparked conversation

My brother made the "live love laugh" signs

Things to not worry about...guests signing something! Never looked at it!

Ours was very personal though so might not with for anyone else who knows!

If you want to make it memorable, how about asking one half of each couple to put their room keys into a big goldfish bowl (you included), and then the other half each fish one out, and that’s who they spend the night with, in an “anything goes” sort of fashion?

Or, if that’s not your thing, maybe have the tables given some quirky names to do with something you both like cities you’ve visited together?

Married a man, that no one had married before. 😄honestly, we did the white elegant wedding which I look back on and still love but I got to marry my best friend.

What's a glitter bar?

I think most weddings are pretty formulaic, because most people want the same things and the wedding industry pushes people down the same road anyway.

If you want something very different and specific to the two of you then do that. If you just want to get married then get married with two witnesses. Otherwise get married and spend your cash on food, drink and entertainment that your guests will appreciate, don’t go for the next instagram wedding craze.

We didn't spend hours dicking about having photos taken.

I married the man I love. Unique, because no one else has him. 😊

Nothing. We decided early on that getting married was exciting enough for us without needing to try and make it unique. We'd been to a few weddings that tried to be quirky and all ended up being quirky in the same way.

We had table names that were all just "things we like" and I picked music in the church that was maybe a little more unusual. But they were just things we liked, not things we wanted to try and stand out.

Very happy with my generic church plus hotel reception wedding!

Very few people get the basics right.

• Make sure the guests don’t go hungry between the church and the main meal
• Don’t make your guests drive for miles between venues
• Don’t make your guests ruin their high heels for a cheesy group shot on the lawn (bonus points if you choose a venue with plentiful parking and actual footpaths instead of gravel)
• Keep the speeches short and don’t have a speech from all 16 groomsmen *Serve good food
• Take the time to speak to everyone and thank them for coming and spend a little bit of time with them.

If you get those things right your wedding will stand out.

From a guests point of view very little is now unique; most ideas have been done before and tbh they rarely make the experience any different.

Feed your guests with nice food and have alcohol (and sift drinks plus tea/coffee) available for guests to access (purchase or free, it doesn't really matter tbh) , don't leave guests waiting around for ages, don't have ultra long speeches with lots of in jokes (short and sweet is usually best; and there's a reason why your best man isn't a professional comedian generally) and don't have a silly expensive wedding gift list or dress code.

For you - your wedding will be unique because you and your partner are marrying one another. Don't waste a ton of money on things that ultimately won't matter.

We kept it simple and focused on good food, plenty of wine and good company.

Bells and whistles are just a waste.

If you're having them, prioritise getting the speeches done early on. Most memorable wedding I ever went to, the best man got shit faced, stood on a chair to make his speech, and fell head first into the cake.