What did you do on your wedding day to make it uniquely yours?

[NoEffingWay]

DP and I are getting married next year, and I'm a bit worried that it's all a bit generic 'nice' wedding.

I have toyed with various ideas but worry they are a bit twee, like having a glitter bar or an ice-cream van for dessert (though would still like ice-cream in my wedding dress!).

What did you do to make the day a bit different from the instagram weddings that all look the same?

It's not the events of the day that you remember; it's how you felt and who you shared it with.

You make it your own by inviting the people you love and enjoying the celebration rather than going mad with the little details that the wedding market sell to you as "must-haves".

I wore a colour other than white. We had no formal, sit-down meal or speeches and simply had a nice, relaxed afternoon in the pub with a buffet and disco. The weather was so nice though that everyone spent most of the day out in the beer garden.

We had extensively researched our family trees for 18 months, I was a Librarian and DH was a research fellow so it was second nature. We printed the tree out on sheets of paper and made a huge scroll that stretched around 20 feet. We got every person who was attending and on the tree to sign by their name which we had laid along the buffet table after the staff had cleared everything away.

We had a craft table, safe stuff no paint or glue for the six small children attending.

We had free booze all day, lots of food, quick photos and quick speeches. I made a speech I still haven’t seen many brides make speeches and this was 25 years ago.

We had school photos of us taken when we were at primary school above the table plan.

DH cousin had each table named after a book that had significance for the group of guests on each table.

We had a small wedding with people we really cared about. Bits to eat straight after ceremony so people weren't hungry and bored, then plenty of bloody good food. Brief informal speeches, simple cake. Big party later. No favours, quirky anything, no gimmicks, no daft seat covers with bows,

Just about every guest told us it was the best wedding they'd ever been to. No idea why really, we spent minimal time organising everything - found a venue, asked the florist to do some flowers they thought would look nice, picked a meal we thought would need popular, ordered invitations off the internet. That really was it. Make the day about the fact two people who love each other, that's what will make it memorable.

To me it was more important the things we left out than the things we did.

We didn't have cars because we didn't want to travel around on the day (all in one venue), didn't have a professional photographer (they irritate me), didn't have any traditions that we didn't want basically. Flowers made of origami, some nice touches we liked but motly just not doing anything we didn't want to just because it's expected.

I'm going to a wedding that's very "different", and even the bride is messaging that she wishes she hadn't planned half of it.

Take stuff away, don't just sleepwalk into having crap that doesn't make it special.

A small thing but we printed out fun/silly photos of us and our friends and family through the years and left them out on the tables - cost next to nothing and seemed to act as a nice conversation starter at dinner. Most got taken home by guests so we assume they enjoyed them!

Hanging around to find out what a glitter bar is.

We eloped so I don't have any advice about weddings.

If you don't think it will be unique, I'm not sure you're marrying the right person.

Ours was at a beautiful but quirky venue that's rarely used for weddings so none of our guests had even been to one there before, despite it being local.

We used a tradition of DH's nationality that meant he met me at the car & we walked into the ceremony & down the aisle together.

We didn't have a cake as neither of us really like cake, we had a 5 tier cheese instead (we do love cheese).

We didn't have much formality, we just wanted people to be relaxed and comfortable.

Oh and we finished at 10.30pm because I hate long dragged out evening receptions with enforced dancing & heavy drinking, even when they're my own

Wedding games. It way hilarious. Much more fun that listening to people droning on in endless speeches.

Two things you couldn't plan or buy.

We got married in a market town (Bakewell) on the Saturday of May Day bank hol. As we came out of the town hall, with all our guests and confetti etc, all the traffic passing beeped and cheered and stopped to let us walk down the road, against the one way, to the reception in a restaurant about 50m away.

During a lull in the proceedings I popped to the pub opposite, in my wedding dress, for a pint with my dad's best friend (Dad died about 7 years before i got married), my brothers, uncles and new DH.

We skipped the dance version of the reception because we both absolutely hate that part of a wedding. Instead we had a cocktail party, paused to get married, then had a formal dinner. It was all done over the course of a few hours one evening. It took place in an old school house. It was perfect for two nerdy introverts.

Honestly, nobody will remember or really care about the sugared almonds/'quirky'alternatives, invitations, 'unique' titles on the seating chart of holiday destinations, the origami confetti holders made of vintage newspaper from 1932 Russia or whatever... feed people enough, provide enough drinks, don't let the day drag on for hours and hours, don't abandon people for too long whilst you have photos, and everyone will have a lovely time.

Awesome all girl choir in the church
Cousin sang while we sign the register
Another cousin played the trumpet as we left the church
Darling dog was a flower girl along with the 9 bridesmaids
An incredible 12 piece live band
Seriously amazing flowers in church and at the yacht club
Lobster and Beef fillet menu
Fabulous champagne and wines
Guests given Huge sparklers when left at the end of the night by boat
Our wedding was simply the best!!!

We started our marriage by celebrating our good fortune by sponsoring a child through World Vision. Her photo was on the alter and the Minister asked us to light a candle together in recognition of her. She is grown up now and we are still sponsoring (on our 4th child).

We've booked a caricature and photo booth magic mirror for our wedding

Btw a glitter bar is when people have glitter 'painted' on their face or arms.
You see it a lot on holiday mainly Ibiza and that

Weddings are generic. I used to work in weddings and they are all the same.
If you want to be different go on don't tell the bride.

Just do something that is personal to you. Get married somewhere you love - a beach, a boat, whatever - not in a conference room. Make it fun for the guests, it's meant to be a celebration. Choose flower and things you love and cover the place in them, don't try to follow "trends". And just make it relaxed and not too "structured" and timetabled so you and everyone else can enjoy it and have fun. It doesn't need to be too complicated. Just ensure booze and food flows freely and everyone will make it fun.

God. That sounds awful. People go to weddings hoping to escape the horrors of pre-schooler crafts! Imagine that when you've finally escaped and got a nice outfit on! 😧🫣😆

Take away the photography. It is a bloody nightmare for everyone and the pictures are always the same.

We booked a photographer from a news paper and he went around for a few hours snapping away. The album is great - reportage style. But more importantly we did not disappear for ages leaving everyone in the lurch!

Honestly the main moans I've ever heard at actual weddings - rather than here - are about lack of food and drink! If there are canapés floating about and a free bar, and the mealtimes aren't insane and plenty of wine available on tables etc, nobody will complain and everyone will enjoy it. People enjoying the day is all that matters. Nobody will care about "unique quirks". They want to be fed and given nice drinks and have fun.

And it is the guests enjoying it that makes the atmosphere good and the celebration a success.

Cooked. I love to cook and rarely have the time or budget to indulge. My whole family pitched in - it was like the jail scene from the Godfather.

Doh! Goodfellas

🤣

@TurquoisePterodactyl it doesn't sound awful! In my group of friends we are early 30s and I can guarantee 95% of them would have the glitter done, including the boys!