Hi @venicebeachb
I have ADHD, and whilst it affects everyone differently, there are strong overlaps with other conditions like anxiety, and also what is a reasonable amount of procrastination and difficulties in life, that many people struggle with, without having ADHD. What I mean is, just because you procrastinate, and have multiple hobbies, and can struggle with certain types of jobs, and these other factors that a lot of the ADHD memes focus on, doesn't necessarily mean you have ADHD. Stress and anxiety can absolutely cause these things, and whilst what you have listed can absolutely be down to ADHD, they could be explained by other things.
Whilst a diagnosis can be helpful, it is not the answer. You will not be fixed or have all your solutions, medication often doesn't work very well, and things like therapy are very difficult to get and
Personally, I would think about the other aspects of your life that may not be explained by anxiety and depression and just the general difficulties of life, and how they are affected. My mind goes at a million miles an hour. It's exhausting. I cannot get simple life tasks done - it goes well beyond work.
An example: yesterday it took me an HOUR to get something from my pocket. Because it was in a different room, past the kitchen. I was unable to do the process of 'remember the thing>get up>walk to thing>collect thing' without each time going into the kitchen, or picking something else up, or starting another task. It is absolutely exhausting, infuriating to the point where I actually scream. The day before I drove for 5 minutes in the wrong direction because I started thinking about a different location. I currently have 13 tabs open in this window and 20 in the other window, and 5 programs open. It's taken me a long time to write this, because the last sentence I wrote triggered me to count my tabs, and then open one, and then start reading it, and then end up on Amazon. I haven't cooked myself a meal for 3 weeks because I cannot get through the whole process. Again, everyone is different, but my point is that with ADHD, distractability, procrastination and difficulties are across your whole life and things like finding it difficult staying in a boring job can be normal. When I tried to do a 'boring' job in an office to try and simplfy my life, I did no work, had panic attacks because I couldn't make myself focus, and ended up having a breakdown after 3 months. Every day was absolutely exhausting, because I was simply unaware about my focus and couldn't stop it each time it shifted.
My relationships are signifincantly affected in many ways, and are a constant stress and strain, because my behaviour affects how I can socialise, what I say and do, and it's often not in my control. I'm a chronic oversharer, I blurt out inappropriate thoughts, and I am hugely sensitive to rejection and criticism. The worst thing is I cannot help it and I cannot change it without a huge amount of effort, it's exhausting.
Also, as ADHD is a lifelong condition from birth, you will need to show how this affected you from an early age to get a diagnosis. It is absolutely true that girls tend to mask, and this is what I did, but I still dropped classes, took a year off from uni, and needed extra help to study. I am also clever and a high achiever.
I am absolutely not poo-pooing your struggles and the possibility that you may have ADHD. I think it's great that adults, particularly women, who have ADHD are now being diagnosed because they are more aware of the condition. But I also find it difficult when people say things like 'oh everyone is a little bit ADHD' or think they have what is a very debilitating, chronic neurological condition because they have lots of hobbies or struggle to hold down a boring job or have struggled working from home in the pandemic. It's waaaaayyyy more than that. These memes and things are great, but they do not show the whole picture.
I would be careful about labelling yourself and going down a road that may not solve your problems if they are explained by something else, and it is entirely possible that you are just you, and that's fine! If you associate with the lesser known things about ADHD, I would of course pursue it.
I had a very similar discussion with a friend who thought they had ADHD, but after a lot of thought and discussion, he came to the conclusion that it's just him. For lots of people, particularly high achievers and creative individuals, they need an exciting job, and to change jobs regulary, and have lots of hobbies. Simply because they are an inquisitive and interesting person, not because their brain is utterly fucked.