Perimenopause is the root of all evil?

[Mushroo]

I’ll preface by saying im 30 and have embarrassingly little knowledge of menopause. However, on here perimenopause it blamed for absolutely everything. I’ve seen it being the cause of:
tiredness
not being bothered about work anymore
sore feet
wrinkles
long periods
short periods
no periods
not giving a shit about peoples opinions
not wanting to socialise
not liking men
discovering you are a lesbian
not liking teenagers
not liking loud restaurants
not liking music
listlessness
depression
anxiety
chin hair
grey pubes
gaining weight
losing weight
a tendency to procrastinate
no tolerance for alcohol

Is it really that bad?! On here it seems
to be the answer to every problem / change imaginable!!

(Somewhat lighthearted!)

I’d attribute my teenage angst to my mother’s menopause and my failed marriage to mine. It’s a bad scene, all round, in my view.

Well at the ripe old age of 42 can tick 18 of those things off your list. Would have ticked none 3 years ago.

I'm 46 and would admit to 12 off your list so I'd say it's pretty accurate!

I consider this one not giving a shit about peoples opinions a benefit actually.

I quite enjoy calling people out on their totally unjustified bullshit, which a few years ago I might have put up with.

Well you won't feelquite so lighthearted about it when you're the one going through it! For me it's been a nightmare. I mean, totally affecting my quality of life. So it hurts a bit to see this post.

Just to show it's not terrible for ALL women, mine has been fine. Really fine.

I never really post on threads like this but this one has got me. Respectfully, I find your post really insensitive - especially the ‘lighthearted’ bit.

I’m 31 and have been peri-menopausal since I was 28 (had to have IVF immediately after finding out to try to become a mother etc) and I can say that I can tick off lots of those things on the list. In addition, as a woman who is part of a network of women dealing with early menopause and POI, there is nothing lighthearted about what it’s done to our lives.

I sincerely hope you’re not going through it yourself, although I suspect you’d never have posted this if you were.

Agreed. I'm glad you find it 'somewhat lighthearted'. Give it a few years and let's see if you still think it's so amusing.

I hate to tell you but that list is not even complete OP It's such an individual thing though, there's no way of knowing how long your list will be until it happens but it's good to understand how wide the scope can be for women. I'm 47 and can tick a fair few items on the list (and some that aren't) but most of it is mildly bothersome rather than really debilitating for me (so far at least) and feels more like a natural progression into the next phase of my life than anything difficult or traumatic.

I'm counting myself lucky, I know it can be awful and I know my options if my symptoms worsen but so far so good. Knowledge is power where menopause is concerned, the more all women know the more we can advocate for ourselves to get what help we need. So bring on the lists! It's good that women are talking about this stuff.

I would say I have got away quite lightly with perimenopause but can identify with many on your list.

The worst for me is disturbed sleep. Being tired exacerbates everything as I don't do lack of sleep very well.

My mum tells me that menopause brought her a bald fanny.

Didn’t need to know tbh

Bloating - don't forget the bloating. Nothing fits anymore!

Yep about 14 of those plus hot flushes incontinence mood swings no sex drive

There are women who have had to give up their jobs because if perimenopause, my friend being one of them. I was at that point too, but thankfully saw a private consultant who prescribed the right HRT for me. Funnily enough, I’m yet to see the ‘light hearted’ side of it. But then, I don’t think k I’ve ever found anything lighthearted about health issues that impact on people’s lives.

I'm 45 and for the past couple of years have been in a perimenopause hell I couldn't have imagined at 30! Thankfully been to GP and things are getting better now but I would advise you to enjoy your 30s to the full before it hits you!!!

My biggest issue is brain fog, honestly Im supposed to be mentoring a new team at work but I can be halfway through a sentence and I just forget what im saying, or cant remember simple terms or names of things .... its sooooo frustrating and I hate it because I just come across as stupid!

Is discovering you're a lesbian evil?

Yeah peri is fucking hilarious, I genuinely thought I had dementia or some rare incurable disease fortunately I have a good doctor who knew exactly what it was because she was going through the same thing. Four years on HRT and I feel better than I did in my 20s.

I'm 39 and this is scaring the shit out of me frankly.

Yep - that bad. Ticked about 18 - plus epic-level brain-fog. Agree with pp's that the inability to give a shit/flying fook about SO MUCH STUFF is one of the few benefits... Ditto, NOT feeling the pressure to socialise/do stuff...

And the "not liking men" - in my case, was becoming increasingly wearied by bullshit/gaslighting/evasiveness/everyday misogyny... Nope NAMALT - but when they are, I'm zero-tolerance these days So is it peri/menopause related, or age & experience related? Either way, it's a 'useful' attribute

You missed a fundamental one off your list. RAGE.

So you can shove right off with your light hearted list and come back in 5-10 years time and see how hilarious life is then.

Im 52 and apart from heavy periods which with the POP has got rid of, i am fine. And at 52 i must be in it.

Hard agree. It's amazing when you fall even slightly out of/are at the fringe of the 'young and sexually appealing' range how obvious and tedious (and everyday) the masculine bullshit/misogny becomes.

Yep 11 here from the list