If you don't say "thank you" when let out in traffic, why is that?

[ChinBristles]

Following on from my last hot topic "if you don't return your trolley at the supermarket, why is that?", this is today's pondering.

I always raise my hand or bip/bop my indicators to say "thank you" but I'd say 50% of the time I let someone out, they don't acknowledge this in anyway.

What are the reasons?

• distracted by a child?


• never taught to do so?


• just an arrogant twat?


• something else?

I usually do it. imagine sometimes, like myself, other people might be distracted, or they might do it and you miss it.
Few times I've been calling people fit to burn, for not acknowledging me, when my passenger has minutes later told me they did.
After a trip to ROI, noticed that no one was waving to thank me. Mentioned it to Irish friend on return and was told me it's not customary to do it there. Not sure if that is true, or if friend was winding me up.
So would also include it might not be customary for some people to wave.

Who gives a shit, just focus on the road FFS. It's not polite to "do something polite" and then get all haughty when people don't show enough gratitude.

I propose a new sticker system:

• if you don't want to be "let out"; or


• are against saying "thank you"

Pop a "NO" sticker on your car and I will act accordingly.

Those of us with "YES" stickers can all wave at each other and glare at the twats, I mean the "NOs". (Who, in my Venn Diagram, cross over a lot with trolley-non-returners!)

Don't get us confused with people declaring re Scottish Independence tho!

The bonus here is that if you have a "YES" sticker, this will act as a sort of permanent "thank you" if in that instance you don't have a free hand!

You are not really supposed to do this, it breaks concentration for you and the other driver, even slightly when all attention should be on scanning ahead and around, not waving gratefully or concentrating on giving thanks. Having said that I do it too, feels bad not to.

I usually say thank you but can’t say I pay attention to who thanks me and who doesn’t- life’s too short!

If I don’t it’s because I have something in my other hand or I’m trying to actually drive the car.

That said, when I learned to drive my driving instructor told me I shouldn’t as could risk being considered dangerous driving. Same with flashing lights.

Northern DH does a tiny hand raise from the wheel. I had to point out to him (after 20 years of marriage) that absolutely no fucker can see that through his rear windshield and he looks like an absolutely arrogant sod when he’s actually super polite…

Don’t ask what your fellow commuter can do for you, ask what you can do for your fellow commuter…

@ChinBristles please tell me you’ll be doing another one of these threads next week on another controversial topic 😂

I was reading just the other week it's actually against the law and said you shouldn't stop to let people out and if they do to you, you shouldn't thank them! It said dont take your hands off the wheel, don't flash your lights and don't use hazard lights as used not for the intended purpose could all land you a £1,000 fine

Wouldn't let me add all three

@curiousitygotthebetterofme I'll try and think of something that hasn't be done to death already!

Yes, I won't thank someone if they've stopped to let me out of a junction when there's no one behind them as it would have been quicker for all involved just to drive on.

It's also the people when you're turning right who flash you to go when there are cars coming the other way so you can't pull out anyway. They are very frustrating.

I'm impressed by all the people who keep both of their hands glued to the steering wheel at all times! This must only be in MN land. In the real world, I find people occasionally remove one hand, especially when stationary in traffic, as per the whole scenario here to apply lipbalm, adjust sunglasses, turn the radio up/down, drink water, etc etc.

I glance in the rear view mirror and don't bother stopping/slowing if there's nothing behind me.

I don't like to "let" people out who have aggressively pushed themselves out half way already, btw! Can't decide either whether it irritates me more if they DO or DON'T say "thank you".

I'm impressed by all the people who keep both of their hands glued to the steering wheel at all times!

I reckon the Venn diagram showing those MNers, and MNers who don't own a loo brush, and MNers who don't answer the door unless they're expecting someone, is basically just a circle.

Ah, the ‘hurried hand-flap of thanks’.

No, I don’t do it. If I’m close enough I’ll try to catch eyes with the person who’s let me out to nod and smile but otherwise no.

I tend to find my hands are otherwise occupied; turning the wheel, changing gear, flicking off the indicator, etc.

Personally I don’t like the left/right/left bip/bop indicator thing. It’s potentially confusing to other drivers — are you planning to turn? both left and right? or are you just having some kind of spasm behind the wheel?

Depends. If someone lets me past when I have priority anyway (e.g. there are parked cars on their side of the road and they don't pull out to pass them), I don't have any reason to thank them. If they let me out when they have priority, then I do thank them.

Well, you shouldn’t do either-especially not “bip/bop” your lights. Both are against the Highway Code. That’s why driving instructors don’t tell people to do it.

@mum2jakie I don't understand why you would infer I have a problem with my eyesight from my comment.?

@mum2jakie oh ok because I don't want to be flashed by the super bright LED s?

I'm not the only one who has issues with these!

www.rac.co.uk/drive/news/motoring-news/nearly-one-in-four-drivers-think-most-car-headlights-are-too-bright/

I thanked a police car the other day 😳

I don’t agree with this. The random act thing is all about generating praise and approval from an audience, whereas letting people out in traffic or through a door is a moment between those two people only that is meant to make the world a more pleasant place. When the person I’ve done a polite thing for reacts impolitely it genuinely makes me wish I hadn’t.

I don’t think about it in relation to traffic as I think the thread has proved there is no way that everyone accepts (I think the friend in the op is quite right not to gesture if she feels safer not to), but I cannot stand people who sail through doors you’ve held open for them while eyeballing you with a dirty look. Like the fact you’ve held the door is confirmation of your proper respective statuses in the world, and by acknowledging with a look of contempt they play their part in reaffirming it. Or maybe this just happens to me!

I always thank police, and they thank us too!

It's not against the Highway Code unless you take your hand off the wheel. I just raise my fingers.