Why do some people have such a problem with body hair?

[Soubriquet]

I rarely shave my legs or underarms. It doesn’t bother me and my dh actually likes hairy underarms.

Yet, I still shave them if I wear something that shows my underarms off because I’m worried people will say something.

A lot of people don’t like women having hairy underarms. Yet it’s acceptable on men.

I have seen the latest trend over the last couple of years where women are showing off their underarms. Even dying the hair a funky colour to make it more acceptable yet most of the comments are unkind.

Why? What is so offensive about body hair?

It doesn’t smell. I wash it every morning and apply deodorant.

I didn't shave anything for 5 years when I was a SAHM. It never bothered me at all what other people might think. But since I've been back at work, I've started shaving again because it felt really unprofessional?! I hate it though - I'm not sure why red, blotchy, irritated armpits are somehow more attractive than a bit of hair 🤔

I think it was gillette who brought it back for modern women, when they wanted to sell more razors so made one for women about 100 years ago. There was an ad where they called underarm hair an embarrasing problem and it just kept going, saying stuff like women who look after themselves and take pride in their appearance shave their underarms. And later it was to be feminine you had to shave, then it was the norm.
Its annoying, I shave but wish that I didn't care and that I didn't feel untidy/ unclean when I don't.

I think some of it is not actually washing properly
A slosh of shower gel on your hand isn't always enough, but if you use bar soap and something scrubby and a bit of time to shift old deo and sweat it's much better
Antiperspirant is designed to stay on so it takes a bit of effort to get off, especially if you have hair

I have grown my underarm hair back and it isn't noticeable unless I go round when wearing sleevless stuff (hardly ever because older lady arms) with my arms above my head!!!
Legs I don't shave all winter but sometimes feel I should so do in the summer. Wish I hadn't started because it would be light and bleached by now and prob not noticeable. But because i started as a teen the hair is darker and blunt ended. I counselled DD not to start shaving her legs (the hair was hardly noticeable) but she has done it anyway. All peer pressure.

There is no trend to grow out arm hair for women. A few people on Twitter might have tried to start one but that’s it.

The reality is more body hair seems more masculine and less body hair seems more feminine - because that is generally the way it goes. Shaving off body hair for women is just a way of accentuating this, no different to shaving a few random face hairs that might make them seem more masculine. In general the more one seems like their given gender the more likely they are to be attractive to the other gender and people at large. It’s nature.

@SpaceJamtart

Its very likely it also coincided with women wearing less clothes so that their body hair could actually be seen, which wasn’t an issue in the Victorian age. In ancient cultures from warmer places women also usually shaved body hair.

@ReadtheReviews

Ancient Egyptians also (in common with us at times) wore less clothing, so the style for shaving probably coincides with hair actually being able to be seen outside the bedroom. This isn’t an issue with a lot of clothes ala Victorian times so that probably explains why shaving wasn’t common then.

If I don't shave, I look like Teen Wolf. I'm all for free choice and maybe if my body hair was fine and blonde, I'd feel less inclined to remove it.

@DecimatedDreams But why be so self conscious about the natural state of your body?
A colleague once commented ' eew gross ' when she saw my pit hair. My response was to raise my arm and give it a stroke while asking her if she was twelve.

In regards to leg hair, women have less. Pubic and armpit hair? No. It's pretty much equal. It's not uncommon for a woman to have more prominent pubic or armpit hair than a man.

So what's your explanation for that? I can accept less leg hair is more feminine because even the hairiest woman me still has a lot less leg hair than a man.

But armpit and pubic hair shows little difference sexes. It's not masculine, it's just as feminine because grown women have hair there.

I don’t agree with shaving/waxing to meet the stereotype of being feminine or more attractive. Waxing or shaving pubic hair to the point it looks pre pubescent is not attractive.

It is NOT nature for women to remove underarm hair. We were brain washed by the media and big corporations to think we had to do it to be more appealing to men.

I have had a bit of a think about this, reading this thread, and considering the contradictions in my own behaviours and my attitudes to my hair.

I am blonde, and very hairy. I spend a fortune getting the hair I don’t want on my face removed; I gave up shaving my legs and armpits a few years ago.
I give my pubes a ‘trim and edge’ periodically. However I have shaved my legs once in the last 12 months, because I was wearing sheer tights and didn’t like the way my leg hair looked under the tights….

I think I might feel different if my hair on my legs/under arms was dark, as it’s long and plentiful.

But it feels uncomfortable admitting that 😐

I simply don't like having hairy armpits or legs, others can do as they wish.

Well it's just the patriarchy innit.

I stopped shaving my legs when my girls got old enough to ask why I did, and I realised I didn't have an answer that I was comfortable giving, as they all relate to social conditioning to think that a natural part of a woman's body is not acceptable.

But I still (occasionally, about once a year) secretly shave them if I'm going to wear opaque tights and the hairs would poke through. It's hard to escape ingrained conditioning!

I don’t mind the look of it, I just hate the feel of it. I don’t like the feeling on me of hairy arms and legs. I also don’t like it when my husband doesn’t shave and kisses me!

I stopped shaving my underarms about a year ago, as I kept getting awful irritation. I swim every day and no one has noticed. I'm quite fair and they've come back quite blonde. My underarms don't smell and I'm not sore any more

My leg hairs on the other hand are dark and thick. I don't do them often but I do veet them when I know I'm going out out.

I'm exactly the same. I don't shave unless i'm showing my legs or wear a top that would show underarms.
when i was in primary school a boy was horrified during swim class when he saw my hairy underarms, and really embarrassed me. Luckily my twin brother educated him and put him in his place, pointing out that his mother would also have hair under there unless she shaved, but the boy disagreed and said his mother doesn't. I took a razor to every part of my body including my face and now i'm so hairy, i wish i would never of started shaving. Because now i can't be bothered with the upkeep.
my DH couldn't care less, but a lot of people just see it as weird /dirty / unattractive. Remember Julia Roberts made front page news decades ago because she didn't shave her underarms. Now some people are showing them off like Madonna's daughter Lordes. I think it's about time people get over it. Women have hair, get over it.

@panteloni

Im not saying it’s entirely logical, but it’s just very simply and stupidly - less body hair (aside from head) equals more feminine because men have more body hair, yes underarms may be naturally the same but that basic principle of body hair seeming masculine is what’s at play.

Its like a woman with a deep voice or whose especially muscular, it may be natural for her but people don’t react favourably because it’s not feminine seeming.

@Alliswells

Its not about what’s natural - it’s about taking what’s feminine seeming to the unnatural to accentuate it. It won’t go away because of that, people viscerally find body hair masculine and icky on women, it is what it is.

I swear if the media told women to shave their heads they would do.

I don’t like my armpits hairy as I do find it smells more, even with deodorant and 2 showers per day. My husband trims his pits too.

But I couldn’t care less if anyone else doesn’t, wouldn't even register with me.

I always worry what others think.
I shave legs but its uncomfortable due to bad veins and tender skin.
And my under arms. I didnt do them the weekend and I've just changed my top as worried ill be judged by the little bit that's there (meeting new people) yet anything else in life i couldn't give a stuff what people think. Strange

I must admit my reaction to seeing underarm hair has changed, it’s a much more positive reaction now. I think it’s less to do with the actual aesthetic of it and more that I think (maybe a little patronising) look at her doing what the fuck she wants and I love it. Whilst I see that we haven’t really really moved on in patriachal terms there are tiny tiny marginal gains. And women claiming autonomy over their bodies is one of them.

i do realise there is a long way to go. I have a teenage daughter and I work in a school. I constantly compare their lived reality to mine back then.

I also would like to grow mine as a skin condition makes shaving difficult but I really smell if I don’t. I leave it longer and longer though to try and minimise skin damage. I might start to leave it and see just how bad it gets