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Original poster

If you don’t like being asked “are you ok?”, what do you like to be asked?

54 replies

IHopeYouStepOnALegPiece · 12/07/2022 07:22

I have a lovely friend who hate being asked “are you ok?” Or “hope you’re ok” and I’m never sure what to say instead so normally fumble my way through!

so just thought I’d ask, what do people prefer instead!

OP posts:
k80pie · 16/08/2022 07:59

CatsmeowCowsmoo · 16/08/2022 07:23

Some people have a pained or anxious resting face so very empathetic or nosey people ask Are you ok?!
How are you can open a can of worms with some people, you ok/are you ok is a short how are you with a yes or no answer.
How are you when most of us dont really want or care to know how you actually are is the standard but it's also so fake because we 99% of the time don't mean it and just going through the motion of polite conversation. you alright/you ok is a quicker way of checking on you. I don't care if you're great, or feeling sad or whatever just answer yes or no.

It's a funny one though isn't it, because hardly anyone is going to say 'no', because then they have to explain why. And if you say 'yes' then it would just feel untrue. Whereas if someone asks 'how are you?' then you can just say 'okay thanks' and that seems sufficient...

jjj123456 · 14/09/2023 20:22

You can say things like have a nice day or enjoy the rest of your day or keep good, stay positive

FictionalCharacter · 14/09/2023 20:29

WishingWell5 · 12/07/2022 07:40

How has your day been?
Are you up to much this week?
Do you fancy doing something?
Have you heard about x, y, Z? What do you think about it? I think ...

Just have a normal conversation?

I don't feel the need to constantly ask people if they are ok, it can also come across as passive aggressive (depending how said) eg implying that they are not. I find that men often do this to women when they perceive them to be ' in a mood'

Yes - it’s sometimes used to mean “you’re being weird, what’s up with you?”

I hate being asked “are you ok” in a “worried voice” with a sympathetic head tilt, when I’m perfectly fine and think I look fine! A family member used to do this, and say it again and again, as though she was (a) suggesting that I didn’t look ok and (b) fishing for personal details of some problem I might have.

EJS72 · 04/04/2025 07:28

It is rather lazy enquiry and low brow.

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