I’m really sorry to hear you’re struggling and thinking things like being financially better off dead than alive. I have worked in universities in the past and they often have a small amount of free counselling sessions for staff - this might be something worth considering, to help talk through how you’re feeling and hopefully find some coping mechanisms for the mental health impact of your current situation.
It’s a really worrying time. Please rest assured you’re not alone. I’m also in a 2x professional household of 2 civil servants, both with a masters, and we’re also feeling the squeeze and are anxious about what’s to come. I am frustrated for you that people are suggesting you’re entitled and living frivolously when we’re experiencing an unprecedented cost of living crisis. We already do most of the things people are suggesting to try to live within our means (batch cook/eat veggie, buy secondhand clothes/toys and sell unwanted stuff, only buy supermarket brand food, have 1 cheap car necessary for work but otherwise walk or cycle, free holiday in a family member’s caravan, make coffee at home and take picnics to the park for a weekend trip etc etc). I’m not going to exaggerate, we are coping, and there are many people far worse off than us (and a lot of my anxiety at the moment is about those people and how they’ll cope this winter) but we’re squeezed, and I’m worried about what’s to come, as the essentials of food and fuel are predicted to keep soaring.
If you’re not already, I really recommend following and thoroughly reading Martin Lewis’ website The Money Saving Expert. It has lots of information about finances (including lots about remortgaging) which will arm you with knowledge before you negotiate remortgaging - don’t just blindly trust a broker without doing a bit of research first. It also has lots of other tips for budgeting, finding the best deals on utilities bills, reducing spending and things like switching bank accounts (I just switched for a free £170 bonus for very little effort). It’s obviously not a silver bullet, but lots of little things in combination can add up. I’ve also recently got some good tips and mantras from social media pages of people who have paid off debt - for example about reframing my perspective and practising more gratitude about my own circumstances rather than comparing to others, and realising what is absolutely essential spending vs good to have but not essential. Try, for example, moneysavvymumuk on Instagram.
Long-term, giving up a free MA to do a low-paid second job doesn’t make much sense, so if I were you I’d do whatever you can now to survive this hopefully short term shock, in as many ways as you can (longer mortgage term, lodger, re-analyse the budget and slash whatever you can) but keep the MA. Yes, it’s really shit to ask your parents for money, but I know mine would be really gutted if I gave up an amazing education opportunity because of money that they actually had sitting in a bank account. You can pay it back when you’re not being robbed of most your income in childcare fees. I would also try to avoid going up to 5 days if you can possibly help it. A job, a masters and children is already a lot…it’s not always just about numbers, your mental health matters too.
Take care OP x