Why did I feel like this? Feel stupid

[MintyGreenDream]

Work in a primary at lunchtime and very used to jokey children and have a tough skin generally.

Today a boy told me that I was "fit as owt and could he take me to the prom?"
On the way home I felt shaky,tearful almost as if I was in shock
Noone else seemed concerned about what was said but I suppose when you work with young children you don't expect it.
Do I need to get an absolute grip?
Not brave enough for AIBU.

MintyGreenDream.
You clearly aren't

This has to be something deeper surely?
What did it make you think of when he said it?

Yes, sorry OP. But you do need to get an absolute grip.

Is there some backstory here? Are you ok?

Hi OP

im not going to take the piss out of you, that’s for sure. If it freaked you out it’s possible it resonates with something more profound. Don’t feel you need to share but it plausible, do you think?

Perhaps it has come as a shock that a primary age child would be thinking like that

Why does everyone on here fucking cry and shake?

Are you the Sistine chapel person?

Think you should report him for making unwanted advances.

Not sure why you're getting a hard time.

Given you've said you're normally thick skinned & can take a joke I would also be curious about your response. This child (essentially) noticed you & expressed a desire to spend time with you, is that something that might be missing in your life? Something you've maybe resigned yourself to not having?

Could obviously be completely off the mark but regardless I admire you for being curious about your response. Feelings generally are trying to tell us something, ignore at your peril!

In the nicest way possible OP. Yes, get a grip.

This is a child of 11 years old or younger. A child.

I’d feel uncomfortable if a child said it to me but I wouldn’t be crying or shaking. I’d have laughed it of and said back to him “no way, I’m old enough to be your mother/grandmother”. Tell a teacher if you have concerns for the child and his home life.

Me too.

OP I was sexually abused as a child and innocent flirty comments could set off a 'fight or flight' response in me as an adult. It would take me right back to being a little girl knowing what was coming next. A horrible feeling of beung under attack and powerless. I'd then desperately try to cover it up and act normal.
Not saying it's the same with you, but there have been some awfully insensitive comments on here. Suggest you sit in your garden with a glass of wine and chill.

Are you SURE you are as thick skinned as you say you are???

It sounds to me like a little boy copying something hes heard an adult in his life say. He might have been genuinly paying you a compliment or it is possible he was taking the piss a bit but either way hes a child. If he'd said ' I hate you' or 'miss you're really pretty' would you be geeling the same?

The OP did question why she felt so affected in the title of the thread.

@MintyGreenDream perhaps it's because you wouldn't expect a primary aged child to say something like that and you're a bit concerned about the dynamics of the relationship now. You don't say which year the child is in but in my school we have some very tall, large year 6 boys. They are taller than me and I think I'd feel a bit stunned and caught off guard after such a comment: it's almost like a shift in the normal teacher/pupil dynamic and a lack of respect.

I would put it on your safeguarding software though or report to DSL. Nothing is likely to come of it but I reckon it's worth reporting.

God Almighty, he didn't say "Hey Minty! Nice Tits, I'd give you one!"

I can't cope with the level of ridiculousness on this.

You are fit and I would like to take you to prom....and you are crying and shaking? You can dislike what he said for whatever reason but the crying and shaking and in shock shite is nuts.

I read fat as an owl 🦉

Tbf this thread is a perfect example how completely lacking empathy most posters on here are. You guys just haven’t got a clue, have you? Seriously, if you haven’t got anything useful/helpful to say, just take your thick skins elsewhere.
OP I don’t know what triggered it but I feel for you. Clearly a sign something is not right in your life. Take good care of yourself x

Maybe you reacted that way because it’s unexpected and inappropriate to have that comment from a child. Please try not to worry about it or some of the horrible responses you’ve received on here. Mentioning it to his teacher might help you feel like you’ve dealt with it.

I don't know why you feel like this but if it had been me, I'd have gone into his class after lunch and told his teacher what he'd said in a loud voice making sure he could hear. He'll maybe learn not to be so cocky in future.

Him and his mates have probably been watching some dodgy videos and egged each other on to say something to a teacher.

Could you expand on what triggered you? You may find some slightly more sympathetic responses

Maybe you need to speak to people who can support you with this (ie friends, therapist etc) who are able to help with that this is really about?

About four years ago I was sitting in a local park on a hot day and a 11-12 year old boy asked me if I wanted a shag. I'm not joking, it was so weird. That disturbed me (although I hoped that one of his friends had put him up to it as a dare rather than him being serious).

I'd have laughed, said thanks Johnny but I'm a little old for you, and been secretly flattered. Am I missing something?

I once got told my a 7 year old whose mother was a prostitute and father a drug dealing pimp that they could get me a job anytime but that the other year 3 teacher wasn’t good looking enough!