What to leave on a memorial bench

[Horological]

It is the anniversary of a friend's death tomorrow. We organised to install a bench in her favourite spot. I'm going to visit the bench tomorrow and would like to leave something. She wasn't a very flowery type of person though and I don't like the sight of decaying flowers, or wrinkled balloons. Any ideas?

Maybe tying a small ribbon or something would work, especially if there’s a colour or colours that have significance for her. It would be an act of remembrance, but without the speedy decay of flowers or balloons.

@DaisyDozyDee ribbons is a great idea!

leaving balloons around is horrendous for the environment too. Do you need to leave anything?

nothing unless you're going to remove it at a later date when it starts to rot / decay

We're going to take a photo of the bench for her mother who can't travel to visit it . Leaving something there shows we have visited, otherwise it's just a photo of a bench. Other people will also visit over the next few days (she was very popular) and leaving something shows we are a group who still think about her.

Why not a photo of each visitor sitting on the bench? Kind of demonstrates her friendships? Or do you think her mother would prefer just the bench.

Don't leave anything. It's just something for someone else to clean up.
A bench in a public place is totally different to a burial site.

I have seen a bunch of flowers left on a bench before, with a label saying 'to the finder: please take these flowers in memory of our friend'. I thought it sweet, to bring joy on a sad day.

Siiting on the bench and being grateful for having your dear friend in your life is enough, no need for anything else.

Don't leave anything they just look scruffy and untidy. But the idea of leaving flowers for someone to take is lovely.

I’d say a photo of you on the bench, and ask other friends to do the same. You can send it to her mum.

Leave a book? Perhaps by one of your friend’s favourites authors, or about a subject she loved. With an inscription in her memory and saying to the finder, we hope you enjoy this book in our friend’s memory and please leave it on another bench when you’re finished.

Don't leave anything. Just take photo of you sitting on the bench for her Mum.

And if it gets rained on and turns to mulch? . A book just dumped on a bench is litter just as much as anything else, tbh.
If it was in an indoor area it might work.

I tie and Christmas card and a birthday card, with messages onto my sons bench. His birthday was 2 weeks after Christmas so they get swopped then. Then I remove the birthday card about 2 weeks later. And I sit on the bench and remember him.

You can put it in a zip lock bag! It doesn't have to be just left out in the rain.

Is there someone close by who could go back in a few days and take the flowers away? If so then a bunch of flowers with the wrapping removed could be nice. Or a small pot plant someone could take away to their garden.

I'd say just go there and enjoy it. Take photos of the people who have visited to send to friend's mum.

The point of a memorial bench, as I see it, is that it is somewhere to go, to think about the person, but also to sit Allen

Is it somewhere you can visit again easily? I found a wooden heart with an inscription and wrote my own message on the back at Christmas and also had solar lights on the back of my friend's bench. I removed them a week later and the lights now live in my garden and I think of her every evening when they light up. Sending 💐

Sorry posted too soon!

To sit alone, or with old friends, or forge new relationships

Agree that photos would be best. Oyerwise maybe decorated rocks?

What sort of location is the bench in? Could you each take a seedbomb or a plant in a small pot to leave? Or could you leave bird seed next to the bench to encourage wildlife to visit?

Agree that nothing is best. You see it as leaving something in memory of your friend, but it's really litter for someone else to clean up. Get flowers, put them on the bench, take the photo for her mum, and then take the flowers home or give them to a randomer.

Sit on the bench, raise a glass/ cup to your friend then Bird seed, scatter it round a bit. Maybe a few mealworms. The birds will thank you.