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Original poster

I have absolutely nobody there for me and wish I wasnt here

50 replies

Uaer1118 · 30/05/2022 21:02

I am distraught. I am pregnant and feeling so alone. I called my family and my partner in tears . Partner works away but only an hours drive. None of them have offered to come over. I have no one. I wish I was dead and I don’t know what to do to be ok. I’m so scared

OP posts:
CormoranStrike · 30/05/2022 21:06

sorry things are tough.

would you like to tell us what’s upsetting you?

Original poster
Uaer1118 · 30/05/2022 21:09

I just mess everything up

I had a lovely partner once who would have done anything for me. My DP doesn’t care. Nobody cares if I live or die. Everything is a mess

OP posts:
Chichz · 30/05/2022 21:10

I'm sorry to hear you're feeling this way.

I imagine they don't realise how bad you're really feeling.

If you feel like acting on any of these thoughts whilst you're alone, please call emergency services. They saved my life.

When you have some company and can talk things through, hopefully you'll feel better. Mention this to your midwife. There is lots of support available in the perinatal period and it will help you and baby once he or she arrives.

Chichz · 30/05/2022 21:11

Just seen your update. That sounds tough.

We care, and so will your midwife.

Do you have friends?

ohthejoysoftoddler · 30/05/2022 21:12

Sorry to hear you are feeling so low. Can you ask one of your family members to come over, explain how you are feeling. I know it'll be tough, but it sounds like you could really do with having someone with you.

Original poster
Uaer1118 · 30/05/2022 21:14

You only care because you don’t know me. Honestly in real life nobody is truly there for me. Nobody. I have friends but they have partners. I don’t mean much to anyone. I could be dead right now and nobody would know or notice. I’ve messed up everything

OP posts:
caringcarer · 30/05/2022 21:16

Call your partner and tell him you really need him to come home right now. I am sure he just does not realise how bad you are feeling right now. We are here for you though. Why do you feel so bad op?

Whatwouldnanado · 30/05/2022 21:16

Please call someone, Samaritans, a neighbour. You shouldn't be alone now. You are precious, your baby needs you. Take care of yourself, eat, drink. Keep posting here until company comes. I

Original poster
Uaer1118 · 30/05/2022 21:18

Honestly nobody will come. I asked my parents and my partner. Nobody wants to be with me

OP posts:
Squicknick · 30/05/2022 21:18

You matter very much. Things obviously seem very dark right now but they will be better. How's the pregnancy going?

Regularmumnetter · 30/05/2022 21:19

I promise you even if it doesn’t feel like it there are loads of people that care about you. And I know I don’t know you but from your OP I see your husband has chosen you to be the mother of his child. You need to tell them straight how you are feeling and know that there is no one who needs you more than your baby and when he/she is born you will mean everything to them!

CormoranStrike · 30/05/2022 21:19

We may be strangers but we do care, because you matter and your baby matters.

please, pop the kettle on, make yourself a cup of tea and really, really remember something you have done that you are proud of.

you say you once had a lovely relationship - so you are capable of loving and being loved.

you have friends - so you are capable of finding and forminag relationships.

please be kind to yourself.

newroundhere · 30/05/2022 21:19

We are listening - however alone you feel. Please call your friends or the samaritans. What is making you feel this way this evening?

Original poster
Uaer1118 · 30/05/2022 21:21

I really have told him, I’ve sobbed down the phone and said I really needed him. He doesn’t care

OP posts:
FlowerArranger · 30/05/2022 21:21

If I'm reading this right you used to be in a relationship you treasured but you feel that somehow you messed it up. And now you are pregnant by someone who isn't very nice and doesn't meet your needs?

Forgetting about the useless boyfriend for a moment...... how do you feel about the pregnancy?

Workinghardeveryday · 30/05/2022 21:24

Oh sweetheart x. I don’t know you or your life. But what I can tell you is we are here for you xxx

Original poster
Uaer1118 · 30/05/2022 21:25

I love my baby I’m just scared I’ve been terrible already. I haven’t eaten well or exercised. I’ve been stressed. I’ve probably caused lots of harm.

my DP doesn’t care about me. I begged him to be with me as I feel so low. He doesn’t care. Nobody does. I am useles and not needed. I wish I had never existed

OP posts:
Chichz · 30/05/2022 21:26

Do you want to tell us why you feel you've messed up?

However bad it's got, professionals won't judge. They're there for you even when others can't be, or it feels like that.

I agree - baby needs you. X

newroundhere · 30/05/2022 21:27

If your DP doesn't care and can't help you then it's him that's useless, not you.

How far along is your pregnancy? Have you spoke to your midwife about your concerns?

CormoranStrike · 30/05/2022 21:27

Your baby will be born totally healthy - trust me, woman’s bodies are designed to grow babies, and while it’s great if you stay well fed and exercised that’s for your health - baby will be getting all his or her nutrients from your body, don’t worry.

do you have family you could go home to?

Chichz · 30/05/2022 21:28

So, do what you can going forwards. Get the help that's needed and is offered.

Pregnancy and the newborn stage is no time to be alone. X

Original poster
Uaer1118 · 30/05/2022 21:29

@Chichz because I let a good man go and now I’m having a baby with a man who couldn’t care less about me. It’s all my stupid fault. I’m a shit person and I deserve this. I know I do. It’s my mess, it’s why I’m alone.

OP posts:
Original poster
Uaer1118 · 30/05/2022 21:30

@Chichz nobody has offered to help. Nobody cares

OP posts:
Squiff70 · 30/05/2022 21:34

I'm so sad to read this thread. You sound lost and lonely and scared. I'm so glad you've posted so that people on Mumsnet can support you even though we are strangers.

How far into the pregnancy are you? Have you just found out and you're panicking? What is scaring you the most?

TheHomeContact · 30/05/2022 21:34

You don't deserve to suffer. I'm sorry your partner sounds crap. And that your parents aren't helping.

I experienced awful perinatal (antenatal?) Depression and was assigned an amazing midwife who visited me every week for months. Really helped.

You can ask if there's a mental health community midwife. Not sure what her actual role name was.

You're not as alone as it feels you are x