Page 3 | What's the worst kids party you've been to

T181 · 2022-05-27T17:41:10+00:00

Please give me some examples of the worst kids party you've been to?? Im hosting one on Sunday for 25 children and actually am so worried about it I need some real life stories to calm my nerves

Thethreecs · 27/05/2022 20:00

I've been to some really bad ones with my 5 over the years.

The ones in the homes that were bad was because there was no food for adults and the party was on for 4 hours. Another just did healthy food for the kids and they were all looking for the sweets and crying. Another was we all had to take off our shoes and sit on bed sheets on the furniture. Another had bought in all these fancy cupcakes that were built up to make a birthday cake, all these fancy glass jars full of retro sweets and chocolate , I could smell cooked food, they had the room decorated all fancy with balloons and shit, we were allowed to take photos in this room but we had to have the party in the garden, we didn't get any of the fancy food, we were told it was only for family later on, we were offered a plate of sandwiches with awful fillings.

Play centres, I don't think there was one decent one. Kids always seem to enjoy them but I always ended up minding the kids of the parents who managed to escape.

Trampoline centres, dear god, I bless myself passing these. When I was told I had to jump with my child I could feel the sweat pouring down my back. There is not a hope in hell I can jump without wetting myself. Even trying to walk on them is impossible. I don't know what I expected from this type of party but I never went again.

Any party that involves parents to be all singing all dancing made me roll my eyes right back into my head and set myself on fire.

Doggyfish · 27/05/2022 20:01

ChocolateHippo · 27/05/2022 19:33

One which was in a hall but the entertainment was very "eco"-themed and crafty - think weaving woolly peg-dolls and making dreamcatchers. It just didn't hold my 4 yo's attention and he and another boy spent the whole time running around the hall poking each other with their peg dolls. The cake looked lovely and my DC was very excited about it (I kept having to herd him away from it) but it turned out to be carrot cake. Having been given a HUGE piece of cake by the birthday child's mum (a lovely, lovely woman!) just because she had seen how enthusiastically he was circling it (like a predatory sharklet), I then had to eat most of it for him. I don't like carrot cake either.

The party bag was very sweet - some seeds in a little packet and a little painted earthenware pot to plant them in - but unfortunately my DC didn't really appreciate it. We had been to a more...traditional... children's party the week before where he had been given the standard sugar-filled plastic affair and I had to shoo him out of the room and our lovely host's hearing when he turned the bag upside down and piped up "Where's the haribo and lollipop?" He also dropped it on the pavement on the way home and cracked the little pot but luckily we were out of hearing by then.

I did make him plant the seeds in the garden but unfortunately nothing came of them. I think the birds probably ate them.

I am crying at this

Beancounter1 · 27/05/2022 20:01

I'm old enough to remember when the hosting parents organised games: pass the parcel, musical chairs or bumps, sleeping lions, pin the tail on the donkey, oranges and lemons, and so on.
I just find it a bit sad that now its usually soft play or a hired entertainment show. All the traditional games are dying out. There's nothing special about soft play, most kids go frequently enough that it just doesn't make a party special.

Lunificent · 27/05/2022 20:02

I once got corralled into being the only parent helper at a theme park party and hotel sleepover. The party mum and I had to share a bedroom with all the girls. They had no intention of stopping shouting all night and party girl’s mum had no intention of stopping them.
Just as I couldn’t bear it any more, the party girl got into the bed I had to share with the mum and got her mum to massage her back. I had to listen to the child purring and mum whispering sweet nothings. It was horrendous.

AlbertBrenneman · 27/05/2022 20:02

A 3 years olds picnick in the park. Started at 11.30. i asked if we needed to bring anything to contribute to the pocnick and was told it wasnt necessary unless my son has special requirements so we didn't take anything. The only food provided was about 5 different types of crisps, melon and blueberries. For the first hour my son and the birthday boy were the only kids there with 7 or 8 adults. An hour in some older kids around 8 or 9 years old turned. Shortly after that the cake was cut and we sciffed down our cake and were out of there before they had even finished handing out cake.

My toddler was starving and there werent any places around to get him something to eat on the way home. The kid ended up with a pasty as there was nothing else open.

Snowraingain · 27/05/2022 20:02

An organic no sugar one. They had salad, cucumber, sourdough bread, hummus and carrot sticks. My dd loved all those things but was horribly loud and unimpressed about the lack of party food. Also no cake.
She would not be shushed and loudly protested. She was 4. She was somewhat hangry. She is now 24 and just as difficult to shush when’s she’s hungry.

BilboBagBin · 27/05/2022 20:03

girlmom21 · 27/05/2022 19:06

We went to one where they told the children Mr Tumble would be attending. The 'Mr Tumble' who turned up was wearing jeans and a T-shirt and a waistcoat made from felt and looked like he'd probably be spending his fee on heroin.

Sounds like the ‘Hummles and Heroin’ South Park episode.

ChocolateHippo · 27/05/2022 20:04

T181 · 27/05/2022 19:49

Oh God some of these are truly horrendous!!! ok that makes me feel better
We have a 2 hour soft play party from 10-12 with a few light snacks(crisps cupcake and an alpen bar) drinks provided. And hot drinks for adults But there is no hot food the place has no kitchen currently (parents are aware of this) we have birthday cake to cut (and another cake incase we run out of the 1st one ) and party bags each which consists of bubbles, 2 glow sticks, a sticky climbing man thingy, and then a little bag of sweet- a lollipop, a dinosaur jelly sweet, a jelly sweet that looks like pizza/hotdog/burger or chips and small kinder chocolate bar.

I've stressed my self silly so much about this party I hope the kids all enjoy them selfs and don't get bored

My son would love this - soft play and sugar.

I would be happy that he's happy (and I'm not constantly having to keep him in check) and a hot drink would be a bonus.

Are you providing the snacks? If so, you could provide some biscuits for the parents. But I wouldn't expect that as a staying parent.

Doggyfish · 27/05/2022 20:04

SBAM · 27/05/2022 19:51

Oh this is making me anxious. I’m hosting my first kids party in a few weeks time.

any tips for what will make a good party? (DD is in reception so usual protocol from the 4/5 there've already been seems to be invite the whole class and parents all stay)

If you put whistles or party horns in the party bags it is absolutely essential that the children do not find the bags before it's time for them to go home. Ask me how I know

Snowraingain · 27/05/2022 20:06

I took dd9 out for the day on her birthday with 4 friends and one of them was just horrible. She stopped speaking to my dd and kept pulling the other friends away. She refused to walk with us and kept trying to run off. Dd was heartbroken and we ended up coming home early.

ChocolateHippo · 27/05/2022 20:07

Snowraingain · 27/05/2022 20:02

An organic no sugar one. They had salad, cucumber, sourdough bread, hummus and carrot sticks. My dd loved all those things but was horribly loud and unimpressed about the lack of party food. Also no cake.
She would not be shushed and loudly protested. She was 4. She was somewhat hangry. She is now 24 and just as difficult to shush when’s she’s hungry.

That's the problem with young kids 😂. They have no social filter. As an adult, you can say a faint "Oh how lovely" and make your excuses at an appropriate moment. And older children can be cowed or shamed into good manners. But there's not all that much that can be done about a discontented 4 year old!

ChocolateHippo · 27/05/2022 20:09

Lunificent · 27/05/2022 20:02

I once got corralled into being the only parent helper at a theme park party and hotel sleepover. The party mum and I had to share a bedroom with all the girls. They had no intention of stopping shouting all night and party girl’s mum had no intention of stopping them.
Just as I couldn’t bear it any more, the party girl got into the bed I had to share with the mum and got her mum to massage her back. I had to listen to the child purring and mum whispering sweet nothings. It was horrendous.

This sounds truly awful 😂. I know no good deed goes unpunished (why did you offer to help?!!) but really....!

OnlyLosersTakeTheBus · 27/05/2022 20:19

There was a preschool one where the food was put out in stages - but only when everyone had finished eating. So we were all waiting for little Susie to finish her carrots before anyone else was going to get to eat any cucumber. I'd never been to a 3 hour party for 4 year olds before but I swear the kids were stuck at that bloody table for at least two hours. I can only think the parents had never, ever, ever been to a kids party before.

Another with an entertainer that looked the spit of Jimmy Savile. One where the candles on the cake set off the fire alarms and we all had to evacuate the hall. One with projectile vomiting. One where some kid ran off and no one realised. One where a dad had left his terminally ill wife for the mother of a child in the same class.

Just feed everyone, don't lose anyone and make sure the kids have something to do or they will go feral very quickly.

IncognitoAF · 27/05/2022 20:20

ChewtonBunny · 27/05/2022 19:46

My kids went to one when they were in YR and Y1. It was a clown/circus party and the clown honked the hosts mum's boobs

Oh my god!!!

SunnyLobelia · 27/05/2022 20:22

This reply has been withdrawn

This message has been withdrawn at the poster's request

Rogue1001MNer · 27/05/2022 20:23

For me the only "bad" parties are ones where the kids aren't thought about. I'm a bit about pps moaning no thought for the adults. Um... the party ain't for you!

The best parties are those with lots for the children to do. Whatever that is. The worst are those where the children are bored. A child should NEVER be bored at a kids party.
(I prided myself on mine)
(I'm a shit mum 99% of the time, but I knew how to entertain the kids. And I did always have seats n drinks for any adults))

Readinstead · 27/05/2022 20:27

T181 · 27/05/2022 19:49

Oh God some of these are truly horrendous!!! ok that makes me feel better
We have a 2 hour soft play party from 10-12 with a few light snacks(crisps cupcake and an alpen bar) drinks provided. And hot drinks for adults But there is no hot food the place has no kitchen currently (parents are aware of this) we have birthday cake to cut (and another cake incase we run out of the 1st one ) and party bags each which consists of bubbles, 2 glow sticks, a sticky climbing man thingy, and then a little bag of sweet- a lollipop, a dinosaur jelly sweet, a jelly sweet that looks like pizza/hotdog/burger or chips and small kinder chocolate bar.

I've stressed my self silly so much about this party I hope the kids all enjoy them selfs and don't get bored

I was reading this to my daughter and DGS appeared and wanted to know if he could come. Think you're going to be fine. 😃

FlamingoYellow · 27/05/2022 20:32

I went to one with a magician who had clearly been doing to same act since the 70s. All his jokes were very sexist and offensive and at one point he kept joking that one of the dads had an erection (he didn't!) - the poor dad was mortified!

It was a very weird 2 hours.

Crimesean · 27/05/2022 20:32

I didn't realise it's expected that the adults are fed too! DS is having a party this summer, I was just going to do a few bowls of chips with mayo/ketchup to dip for the adults to pick at - do I really need to feed them lunch?

rainbowzebra05 · 27/05/2022 20:33

My son's 9th birthday was in a swimming pool. Some kids were still 8 so we'd made sure we had 1 adult to every 2 kids. Said that parents had to stay and watch for getting changed reasons because not all helpers were DBS checked, and were welcome to swim if they preferred. Nobody chose to swim.

Nobody told us that their kids didn't know how to swim either, just sent them in and hoped we'd notice if they struggled. Multiple kids used floats and got stuck in the deep end when they didn't know how to swim, I was exhausted by the end from bringing them back to a depth they could touch the floor in repeatedly.

It could have been worse, but I've never known such a stressful party to host!

Goodskin46 · 27/05/2022 20:34

Worst party was a rained off BBQ in tbe woods, so we went to their home, in which they had prepared nothing and waited while they cooked burgers invidually over a single gas ring. O left after 2 hours, not having had any food.

WithAnXXHere · 27/05/2022 20:35

This thread is brilliant!

I've never been to any party, adult or child, that's been as eventful as some of these.

I was once at a funeral wake in a pub, and there was a kids party going on in the function room. At one point, a conga line (it was the 90s) came through into the wake, which was quite funny to witness.

ChocolateHippo · 27/05/2022 20:35

Crimesean · 27/05/2022 20:32

I didn't realise it's expected that the adults are fed too! DS is having a party this summer, I was just going to do a few bowls of chips with mayo/ketchup to dip for the adults to pick at - do I really need to feed them lunch?

It depends...if you're expecting them to stay for 4 hours over lunch-time, it might be nice to at least give them a sandwich or two (unless you're happy for them to pop out to get their own food!). If it's a morning or afternoon party, then no I wouldn't expect anything more than perhaps a cup of tea or a biscuit if I'm lucky.

FlamingoYellow · 27/05/2022 20:36

Crimesean · 27/05/2022 20:32

I didn't realise it's expected that the adults are fed too! DS is having a party this summer, I was just going to do a few bowls of chips with mayo/ketchup to dip for the adults to pick at - do I really need to feed them lunch?

If its only going on for a couple of hours then that's fine. I would provide drinks for adults if it's warm weather though.

Although the best kids party I ever went to they ordered in pizza for the adults...

girlmom21 · 27/05/2022 20:37

Crimesean · 27/05/2022 20:32

I didn't realise it's expected that the adults are fed too! DS is having a party this summer, I was just going to do a few bowls of chips with mayo/ketchup to dip for the adults to pick at - do I really need to feed them lunch?

No. Adults can manage a whole two hours without eating and, if they can't, they can bring their own snacks.

I don't understand why there's so much drama over parents not being provided for. I don't have an issue with there being no provision for me. If there's somewhere to buy a coffee I'll do so. I certainly don't expect parents to be catering for me.