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Original poster

Feel sad about wedding photos...talk sense into me

43 replies

WhatsHoppening · 23/05/2022 12:45

Our wedding was 3 years ago, it was a lovely day and we had the best time.

Recently though as friends get married I regret our photos. We didn't want hours of formal photos so they are a few of DH and I when we first arrived at the venue, one with each of our parents and grandparents and thats it. The rest are lovely, candid of everyone chatting and laughing and having a great time. But we don't have one of my side of the family or DHs side of the family all together.

I will I have a nice photo with my family, siblings, my cousins, my uni friends. If I could go back I wish we had had that half an hour of formal pics.

I know it doesn't matter we were all there, there are photos of everyone and it was lovely. But I do really regret it and recently have been feeling down about it (I know v silly and first world probs). I do have nice pics of my mum and dad, bridesmaids including my sister etc.

Snap me out it please!

OP posts:
maisiedaisy64 · 23/05/2022 12:48

We got married 4 years ago and I could have written your post. Though for us, we wanted those formal shots and I foolishly picked a photographer who wasn’t very good at those types of pictures.

I fully relate to the feeling of disappointment, but not sure I can offer any advice!

ApolloandDaphne · 23/05/2022 12:49

Quite honestly I've been married for 37 years and I can't remember the last time I looked at our wedding photos. They are in a box in a cupboard somewhere. I still have my amazing memories of the day and the photos don't capture that at all. In fact the ones I like best are the really informal ones that my brother took. I am. Or a fan of very formal photos. I am sure yours are wonderful and capture just how the day was.

SlipperyLizard · 23/05/2022 12:58

We’ve been married 15 years this month & probably haven’t even looked at our wedding pics 15 times!

PILs were late to the registry office so we have no equivalent pics of them at/outside the ceremony like we have for my family, and our photographer was (in hindsight) too formal/traditional for our tastes (don’t think we knew we had taste in wedding photography!).

But it doesn’t matter, in the big scheme of things, please try to let it go as there’s nothing that can be done.

Interested in this thread?

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Weddings
MrsPelligrinoPetrichor · 23/05/2022 13:01

Could you buy a special photo frame that holds multiple photos and put the photos in it? That way you're all together even though separate photos.

ComDummings · 23/05/2022 13:03

I’ll be honest I don’t know many people who look at their wedding pictures again! As long as you have a few of you and your husband that’s all that matters because that’s what the day was about. Pictures aren’t everything, the memories of the day count just as much

nearlyspringyay · 23/05/2022 13:04

I've got a mixture of formal and posed. The album is under the bed and I don't think I've looked at it for at least ten years....

KangarooKenny · 23/05/2022 13:06

I had the for al photos, then went to a park for more. I wish I’d had less photos and just asked guests to send me theirs.

CheshireCats · 23/05/2022 13:07

Also haven't looked at my wedding photos for at least 10years (married for 18 yrs)
I really don't think your photos matter too much.

Qwill · 23/05/2022 13:09

I’ve never looked at mine! On the plus side, if any of your family break up with their partners, you don’t have worry about it! I was only thinking the other day that I was in a lot of formal family wedding photos with my ex - they’ve probably all been removed from the walls now 😂

Ithinkwemightgetaholiday · 23/05/2022 13:12

Our wedding photos were a bit crap too. We got married 17 years ago and it doesn't bother me any more. It sounds like you got the important ones done. I don't think it's that strange to still think about it. It's such a big day, I think anything that is slightly negative can feel bigger than it is. We had a balloon arch and table decorations rather than flowers and they weren't quite the colour we discussed with the lady who did them. That still bothers me!

EspeciallyDistracted · 23/05/2022 13:12

Ours are in a box in the attic, we just have one small one of DH and I framed. I don't think many people look at them much after the first year or so. Even my teen DCs have never seen ours as they have been in the attic since before they were born.

Sharrowgirl · 23/05/2022 13:17

Why do people pay these photographers thousands of pounds for a bunch of photos they never look at?!

SpringHasSprungGrassIsRiz · 23/05/2022 13:19

I wasn't that bothered, it was a small destination wedding. Dsis insisted I'd regret it, as she loved looking at hers, so caved and got a photographer and video.

We got them out the attic for our 10th Anniversary to show the kids......and back they went probably for another 10 years!

I can't say they've really added too much value to our lives....

AuntieDolly · 23/05/2022 13:20

There is a saying: Beyond repair, beyond care, which means if there is nothing you can do about something, don't worry about it. I think this might be one of those times.

RockAndOrRoll · 23/05/2022 13:23

Sharrowgirl · 23/05/2022 13:17

Why do people pay these photographers thousands of pounds for a bunch of photos they never look at?!

I always wonder this! I suppose it seems worth it at the time...

InTheNightWeWillWish · 23/05/2022 13:28

I lost my aunt (who I was very close to) a couple of months after our wedding. I was so upset that we hadn’t got the formal family photos and now we wouldn’t have a chance to get that photo again. It took a little while and I’m still a bit sad we don’t have the full family photo but I looked at my wedding photos and looked for ones that I loved. The photos I loved were the candid photos, the formal photos we did get are just a bit meh. I also know my aunt had the best time at my wedding and so I console myself with the fact that I have some fantastic candid photos and she got to have a great time, rather than standing round for an hour waiting to be called into a photo to stand awkwardly and smile. If we had more time for formal photos then we would have less time for candid photos that we do love.

NotMeNoNo · 23/05/2022 13:49

We got married a long time ago but the photographer was very average. It was pre digital photography and he only shot 2 or 3 films so there are literally about 50 or 60 photos of the whole day. They are the formal ones but no candid shots or pictures of guests at all. I am a bit envious of these albums of thousands of digital pictures. On the other hand as PP said, it's in the past now and can't be helped!

PipeScatter · 23/05/2022 13:49

Ditto. I got married recently and we had some formal shots with family, etc, but it was only afterwards that my DM said they didn't have any photos with just me, DH and my DPs or me and my DPs. As much as they love their new SIL, they don't get a chance to have nice photos with me very often. I'm kicking myself for not thinking about it on the day. We'd even spoken about what photos we wanted beforehand and for some reason it didn't even cross our minds.

I am just hoping that the non-formal shots captured some nice ones of me and my DPs, or have the ability to be cropped in to one!

ChonkyDonkey · 23/05/2022 13:49

Maybe you could have someone stitch some of your candid shots together digitally for a group shot, like below. (This was the first suggestion that came up in google, nothing to do with me or anyone I know btw!).

www.etsy.com/listing/939206119/merge-multiple-photos-personalised-gift

derekthe1adyhamster · 23/05/2022 14:07

I dislike my formal photos - 25 years ago before digital ones.
But I am glad we had them because sadly there are so many guests who are no longer with us now

Blossomtoes · 23/05/2022 14:10

In 22 years of marriage we’ve never looked at our wedding photographs. I couldn’t even tell you where they are. Enjoy the ones you have and stop wishing you had a time machine.

DeskInUse · 23/05/2022 14:16

I'm probably being unhelpful, but why worry about it, you can't change it

DockOTheBay · 23/05/2022 14:25

AuntieDolly · 23/05/2022 13:20

There is a saying: Beyond repair, beyond care, which means if there is nothing you can do about something, don't worry about it. I think this might be one of those times.

I agree
There is absolutely nothing you can do about this now, so there us no point being upset about it.

ProclivityForPyrotechnics · 23/05/2022 14:26

We got married 6 years ago and I look at the photos all the time! It was the best day of my life!

Newgirls · 23/05/2022 14:29

Maybe have a party with your uni mates and get some pics?

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