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Original poster

Tip for making life easier? It's exhausting!

53 replies

ImFree2doasiwant · 02/05/2022 07:19

I recently spent a few months "letting things go," thinking that you can't do it all. All that's happened it everything is a mess!

I'm single, 2 young DC ,(young primary) I work supposed to be 3 days a week but have ended up working in school hours the other 2 weekdays.

DC go to their dad's Sundays. Yesterday, I didn't stop. Housework, wshing, ironing. I do have 2 ponies, so have to deal with them also (I know, I have had them 24 and 14 years, they are nit new additions and although they create more work, also keep me sane)

The house is a mess . I'm constantly decluttering. Cleaning. The whole place needs decorating. The garden is too much. I don't have spare money really to pay someone although I had I had man come and do 2 hours in the garden, £30 snd very disappointing with what he actually did.

Any ideas on how to make this easier? Or is this just it?

OP posts:
sunlovingcriminal · 02/05/2022 07:33

I don't have any huge or massive tips- but have you listed out the jobs that need to be done? Every Saturday morning I sit down, write a list of jobs that need to be done during the week, meal plan, write shopping list, birthdays, appointments, and try and work through them. I work full time, 3 kids (but do have a dp). We don't cope that well, and still look like we've been robbed most the time, but it's better than nothing!

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 02/05/2022 07:36

To tidy and clean constantly. When they are eating dinner, change the beds - when you are running them a bath clean the bathroom- when they are in bed do something else productive.
it’s shit and endless

Original poster
ImFree2doasiwant · 02/05/2022 07:39

I do work from a list. It does help gey me organised. It's just so overwhelming. No matter how much I clean and tidy the house will always look shit because its old and very tired. I know people always say "lower your standards" they are already low. I'm doing the extra work to try and save up to decorate etc but have had a series of unexpected expenses (vets, heating oil tripling in price, car....) so I guess I feel like I'm working more, less time to get stuff done and nothing to show for it

OP posts:
Original poster
ImFree2doasiwant · 02/05/2022 07:40

@OnlyFoolsnMothers shit and endless. Just about sums it up.

OP posts:
sandgrown · 02/05/2022 07:42

Jumping on if you don’t mind as I need help too. My daughter has started meal planning and shopping to a list which she feels saves time and money . I find I can work better in short bursts ( I work very quickly if visitors are due!) I set a timer and see how much I can do in 15 minutes. I try to wash up as I am cooking rather than have a massive pile after a meal when I am full and relaxed.

fizzyfood · 02/05/2022 07:45

Have you got anyone you can ask for help? If on a Sunday someone comes over and you do it together, you could do it for several weeks and then it might be easier to keep on top of it all

SpringLobelia · 02/05/2022 07:45

It is so depressing isnt it. I really feel for you (and am in a similar position).

I do use the Organised mum method to cover the bases. It helps me to know that on so and so day I just need to get the basics done plus a focus on whatever room. I have adapted it though to suit me, but pretty much do follow it.

One thing that has helped me though (and it sounds too simple to even be mentiooned, but it has helped) is that I make all the beds as soon as we get up. Then I spend 10 minutes (timer on) just tidying up the sitting room and where the DCs have played.

But it is relentless, exhausting, and often sucks.

SpringLobelia · 02/05/2022 07:46

Oh- and i clean the bathroom when using it first thing.

Porridgewithhoneyandnuts · 02/05/2022 07:47
Flowers

I have personally found it’s definitely easier to start from a position of tidiness if that makes sense. It’s really hard trying to keep on top of it’s already quite messy.

FlowersFlowersEverywhere · 02/05/2022 07:47

Lists are good as long as they don’t overwhelm you, which then makes you feel tired and down

Try breaking big actions down into ten minute chunks, then each day aim to tick off five or six ten minute chunks as you’re in between doing other things. It starts to really motivate you to see what you can for in and before you know you’ve achieved a lot.
so when you put the dinner, maybe you’ve got ten minutes before it needs any more attention - have a quick look at your ten minute list and do the next thing on it!

Undecicive · 02/05/2022 07:50

I'd just skip the ironing altogether, tbh.

YellowHpok · 02/05/2022 07:50

I came on to suggest the organised mum method, which essentially just means cleaning and putting away one load of washing per day, and doing 30 mins cleaning per day. So one day its the bathroom, then another a bedroom etc.

Also batch cooking freezer meals. BBC good food has some great family friendly meal ideas that can be scaled up and frozen. The spaghetti bolognaise is delicious.

Original poster
ImFree2doasiwant · 02/05/2022 07:51

I haven't really got anyone to help. Not on a regular basis, but did think of trying to organise a garden day, I think a few people could help me blitz it and have a bbq or something after.

I'm finding the "stuff" hard to deal with. I don't have spare money so try o sell syuff but it's time consuming In itself and I live rurally which makes it harder - people dont want to travel here.

I did do the organised mum method and it worked well when I had a weekday free for the Friday deep clean. I will start it again as it helps to have a pre made list.

OP posts:
Flopisfatteningbingforchristmas · 02/05/2022 07:51

I’m watching a few threads on this theme…

Flopisfatteningbingforchristmas · 02/05/2022 07:53

www.mumsnet.com/talk/_chat/4443571-things-you-ve-done-to-simplify-your-life

Original poster
ImFree2doasiwant · 02/05/2022 07:53

I dont iron. I ironed on Saturday as we were going to a wedding.

OP posts:
Original poster
ImFree2doasiwant · 02/05/2022 07:54

Thanks @Flopisfatteningbingforchristmas I will check those out.

OP posts:
Original poster
ImFree2doasiwant · 02/05/2022 07:55

I think the answer is to have more money. Or time. 😆

OP posts:
R2G · 02/05/2022 07:56

OK you need to try to keep Sundays for yourself. That is a day to rest and recharge. I'm not single now but used to be with little kids. Had a similar time frame to you, minus the ponies!
Have you heard of The Organised Mum method? I think that would work well for you regarding cleaning and tidying, and if you print it off the children can help. Get some kid friendly stuff to clean, for example a dishmatic filled with white vinegar and washing up liquid, the kids can clean the shower or sinks with easily with easily and you rinse off, while you clean the toilet.
Is there an area you can make more time such as cooking? If you get a weekly online shop going and delivered Sunday morning you can get it put away and reset for the week. Have you got an air fryer and slow cooker? Almost everything I cook is done in that. I make a big salad at the start of the week and have that with chicken breast done in the air fryer. Not just leaves often pasta salad eg walnuts, apples or pasta mozzarella pesto tomoatos pine nuts. All prepared and divided on a Sunday for an hour up to Wednesday and then again on Wednesday. Tea in the week takes no more than 5 mins to heat up.

stuntbubbles · 02/05/2022 07:56

I work supposed to be 3 days a week but have ended up working in school hours the other 2 weekdays.
If you’re getting paid for 3 days, work 3, then you’ll have 2 free for getting organised and decorating; doing the garden, etc. Long-term once the deco and garden are in order you’ll have free time. Otherwise, go up to 5 officially, get paid for 5, and have more money to spend on a cleaner, decorator, etc.

Can DC’s dad take them for a full weekend or chunk of time so you can get on an even keel? Or you take a week of annual leave to just blitz it? It’s much easier to stay on top of things if you start from a good space; much harder if you’re going uphill all the way .

FlowerArranger · 02/05/2022 08:01

Try breaking big actions down into ten minute chunks, then each day aim to tick off five or six ten minute chunks as you’re in between doing other things. It starts to really motivate you to see what you can for in and before you know you’ve achieved a lot.

I agree with the above. And I'd extend it to decorating. You'll never find the time to clear a room, put down dustsheets, and paint the entire room. So do one corner or one wall at a time. Yes, the whole job will take longer, but at least it'll get done. Keep the brushes and rollers in sealed plastic bags so you don't have to wash them every time. And don't bother painting the ceilings unless they are very grotty.

But before you start, have a good declutter. Go as minimalist as you can - saves soooo much time!

Original poster
ImFree2doasiwant · 02/05/2022 08:03

@stuntbubbles the extra work is extra money but it's been eaten up by a bloody massive vets bill, car bill and heating oil. It's great I had the money but still. Hopefully going forward I can put some aside. Really I could do with only doing 1 extra day. But it's hard to turn the extra money down.

Re DC dad, it's mostly a no at the moment. They go for very occasional overnights.

OP posts:
Original poster
ImFree2doasiwant · 02/05/2022 08:04

I've actually booked this week off while the DC are at school. I have a but if work but will have 3 days free while they are at school. Tonight I will make the plan.

OP posts:
Florrey · 02/05/2022 08:06

Stop doing stuff that doesn’t need to be done. I haven’t cleaned my windows since 2016. The world has not ended.

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