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Original poster

Question about your housekeeping standards vs how you were brought up

111 replies

Loverofallthingsleopardprint · 27/04/2022 21:13

If you were brought up in a clean and tidy home, do you keep a clean and tidy home yourself or have you gone the opposite way and become a little bit of a slob?

Or if you grew up in a messy/dirty/disorganised home, what are you like now? Are you messy now yourself or do you prefer a tidy house?

OP posts:
chisanunian · 27/04/2022 21:15

My late DM was an absolute martyr to housework, and I vowed to never be like that. And I'm not.

Antarcticant · 27/04/2022 21:17

You couldn't get much lower than my parents' standards. Mine are better but not as good as I'd like - I've had to learn as an adult the basics of keeping a house clean and tidy - it doesn't come naturally because it was never modelled to me as child.

Floralnomad · 27/04/2022 21:19

My mum kept a clean and tidy house and I also keep a clean and tidy house . My MIL a is an obsessive cleaner , it’s ridiculous.

Vsirbdo · 27/04/2022 21:20

My house growing up was clean but often disorganised and a bit messy. As a result I’ve always tried really hard to have a tidy orderly home and I’m more minimalist but with 3 DC and a messy husband I’m fighting a losing battle and I’ve decided to no longer worry as long as it’s clean under the mess so I’ve ended up following my mums pattern

mynameiscalypso · 27/04/2022 21:21

Both my parents are very tidy and we always had a cleaner when I was growing up. My room was always the hell hole and a total mess and it remains that way even though I'm nearly 40. We do have a cleaner though so I make sure the rest of the place is tidy enough for her.

Isonthecase · 27/04/2022 21:21

Mine are probably about the same standard. Clean enough to be hygenic but I'm certainly not going to let it take over my life. I think my whole family are about the same.

Ilikecheeseontoast · 27/04/2022 21:23

Vsirbdo · 27/04/2022 21:20

My house growing up was clean but often disorganised and a bit messy. As a result I’ve always tried really hard to have a tidy orderly home and I’m more minimalist but with 3 DC and a messy husband I’m fighting a losing battle and I’ve decided to no longer worry as long as it’s clean under the mess so I’ve ended up following my mums pattern

Are you me?

hugoagogo · 27/04/2022 21:24

Antarcticant · 27/04/2022 21:17

You couldn't get much lower than my parents' standards. Mine are better but not as good as I'd like - I've had to learn as an adult the basics of keeping a house clean and tidy - it doesn't come naturally because it was never modelled to me as child.

Basically this.
I really don't know what is a normal amount of cleaning to do.Blush

DragonOverTheMoon · 27/04/2022 21:24

Mines about my mums standards. I'm not adverse to leaving the washing up/dishwasher loading till the morning if I've had friends over, I don't martyr myself like she did, but I definitely clean a lot more than I wish. I can't relax in mess and enjoy cleaning on a Saturday morning.

Alphabet1spaghetti2 · 27/04/2022 21:24

Mum was do what needed to be done so you don’t die and keep clutter to a bare minimum. Dad - what’s housework?
me - ocd neat freak who likes clear and clean surfaces. But has secret messy drawer.

Tlollj · 27/04/2022 21:24

My mum and my sister are two of the most messy people you could meet. You have to move piles of magazines or clean washing before you can sit down anywhere.
I like my house really clean, tidy and organised. Exactly opposite.

Passanotherjaffacake · 27/04/2022 21:27

I grew up in a messy and dirty house with more pets then my parents could manage. Never used to like bringing friends back to mine when I got older.

Have made a vow to do things differently for my children so they have a happy, clean home they can bring friends back to. Have had to teach myself. Hope to do right by my DC.

Verbena87 · 27/04/2022 21:28

Dad’s naturally very tidy and clean (his mum is the same, she’s nearly 90 and their house is still immaculate and beautifully run). Mum is really messy. So our house was somewhere in the middle growing up.

My sister is neat and clean. I am a messy slob but trying hard to get into a better routine.

Pizzadreams · 27/04/2022 21:30

what one person thinks is dirty and disorganised someone else might think is acceptable.

there was a thread on here where someone took a pic of something in their home, it was done on impulse and posted immediately, the woman had rubbish on her floor. Literally rubbish. strewed on her floor, But she clearly felt it was clean and tidy enough to post an image of. I kept looking at it thinking wow, she’s got rubbish on her floor as standard.

the other example is people posting images of their homes for sale. Unbelievable clutter, marks on walls, unmade beds, dirty towels, fully loaded washing machines, filthy outside areas and they can’t work out what’s wrong with it.

so I think the point I’m making is when someone says their home is relatively clean and tidy everyone else might think it’s a minging mess and if someone says it’s a mess everyone else might think it’s pristine.

Squealier · 27/04/2022 21:31

I have higher standards than my parents. I have a deep clean (5hours for small house) once a fortnight and I do floors a lot in between. Everything has a place and is left tidy at the end of each day, I often polish up taps and surfaces to look extra nice.

emmathedilemma · 27/04/2022 21:31

My mum is the sort of person who gets in a flap if she can’t clean the bathroom on the scheduled day! That said, she’s never worked fulltime so I allow myself some slack on the front!

LadyWhistledownofWhistleton · 27/04/2022 21:33

My parents house was filthy, messy and stank. I never brought friends home and spent my teenage years constantly cleaning and tidying. I have super high standards in my home and hate anything out of place.

mdinbc · 27/04/2022 21:40

I would gauge that I'm about on par with the way I was brought up which is tidy and on a schedule, and so are 2 of 3 of my grown kids. The other's standards are much lower.. I'm a bit mortified when I walk up to his house with long grass, toys all over the place and you can barely get in the door for all the shoes and boots. I cannot blame his spouse because they are a couple and they both need to take charge. But I zip my mouth! Not my business.

JenniferAllisonPhillipaSue · 27/04/2022 21:47

My DM would have a fit if she saw the dust bunnies under our bed ... No, I don't keep my house to her standards. I have a full-time job, a life, and a disabled child. I do the basics (remove rubbish, wipe down worktops, mop floor, washing basket always manageable) to a level that I am comfortable with. But my epitaph will not read "I wish I'd spent more time cleaning".

orangetriangle · 27/04/2022 21:48

my house is far more clean and tidy than my parents was not that theirs was dirty but to my mind untidy I think I am probably over the top but cant stand a messy dirty house. Most houses look messy and or grubby to me !!!

Blossomtoes · 27/04/2022 21:49

My parents’ house and garden were immaculate until they were very old. Ours is OK-ish, I’d like it to be a bit cleaner and a LOT tidier. My son’s an artist and his place is one big studio.

Echobelly · 27/04/2022 21:52

We had a cleaner but my mum was also very tidy (dad didn't do anythign around the house). My parents didn't particularly enforce us tidying our rooms (3 kids) and we were all pretty messy but not revolting/dirty (ie no mouldering food in bedrooms). So the main parts of the house were clean. DH's MIL very clean.

Our house a tip except for when the cleaner's just been each week - again, messy, not dirty/gross. I dunno, I do some things but I don't know where people find the energy to keep everywhere tidy and clean!

Dairyqueenie · 27/04/2022 21:52

Childhood home was always clean and tidy but not obsessively so - it was an old house and there were always a few cobwebs around. Mum did get into a big tizzy before guests came over though when everyone would be forced to clean tirelessly in preparation for their arrival. My standards are pretty low - things are above the dysentery level just: dishes washed after each meal / washing done daily and major clutter put away etc but I struggle to keep on top of the more subtle things like hoovering under the sofa cushions/ dusting stuff and cleaning windows. In my defence I have three children and not a lot of spare time on my hands. Our home is colourful and a bit chaotic but homely.

Echobelly · 27/04/2022 21:52

*my MIL, I mean!

DolphinaPD · 27/04/2022 21:54

My mum has standards that I do not 😂

We grew up in a clean and tidy home. Sometimes I don't mop my floors from one week to the next (I do sweep daily, most of the time).

I wasn't brought up to live like this and my mum calls me slovenly.