Question about your housekeeping standards vs how you were brought up

[Loverofallthingsleopardprint]

If you were brought up in a clean and tidy home, do you keep a clean and tidy home yourself or have you gone the opposite way and become a little bit of a slob?

Or if you grew up in a messy/dirty/disorganised home, what are you like now? Are you messy now yourself or do you prefer a tidy house?

Childhood home was clean enough, not what MNers would think of as clean, probably! My DF worked full time and DM from when I was 8, they both hoovered and washed up but DM did all the other cleaning. I remember the kitchen didn't really get deep cleaned, surfaces were OK but there was quite a lot of that greasy dust you get. When I moved out I became more of a clean freak and have kept my own homes a lot cleaner.

It wasn't messy or disorganised, tho, it was very tidy from what I remember.

I’m the outlier in my family. Mum, her parents, my sister, all neat freaks. Dishes washed and put away straight after eating. Living room spotless and used only for sitting or watching TV. We were never allowed toys in there. Everyone up and dressed by 7am (8am weekends and holidays). Everywhere spotless before bed. I hated it. It’s so regimented.

For me, my home is a place to relax. It’s not particularly messy or dirty. But if I want to leave dinner dishes over night or leave something to put away later, then I do and I don’t stress about it. When I go to bed, I just go to bed, I don’t straighten the sofa and tidy up. I’ll lie in on the weekends and read with a coffee. In short I do what I feel like doing, not what I feel I “have” to do. Sometimes I’ll decide to have a big clean up but it’s on my terms.

My mum is in her 70’s now and still just as regimented, yet constantly moans about it. She will fall asleep now on a chair in the afternoon but refuses to actually lie down on a bed, because she see’s it as “lazy”. Even though she wakes stiff and uncomfortable. She moans about all the time her routines take, but can’t even think about changing it. I’m glad I’m not like that.

I can't be who I want to be with regards to my house. I was brought up in both- my dads house was chaos and my mums was tidy. I want to be tidy and minimalist. My husband wants to hoard clutter and is incredibly disorganised and the children are as well

My mum - who sets the standards in my parents house - is quite a mix: her kitchen is spotless, you could eat your dinner off the counters or floors anytime. Her toilets are also super clean. But her bath/shower is always grimy. She is very slack on household laundry - she washed my sheets maybe twice a year when I was a child and her own I think about the same. Towels and bathmats the same. Her house is extremely cluttered too, except for the kitchen.

I think I am more even in my approach - my kitchen is messier but the rest of the house cleaner and much less clutter. I don't wash sheets and towels as much as many on here but way more than my mother

My Mum was disorganised and the house was messy. My Dad tidied stuff at times but didn't do housework. They had cleaners from time to time. But they never lasted that long. My mum thought housework was boring and was for folk who had nothing better to do with their time.

I wish I was better trained in housework but have tried different systems. The Organised mum method is certainly the best I've tried. A messy house is no fun for anybody.

Childhood home-always pristine. Must have a plate and eat at the table if you had an apple for example. Never saw a hair on a sink and the smell of bleach is a childhood memory. Mother was always doing some kind of housework.

My home - tolerable clutter and dust. Dog hair. Gets blitzed one a week better things to do frankly.

Our Airbnb - pristine. I couldn't bear for a guest to find a speck of dust and every inch is dusted and cleaned meticulously before a guest arrives even though our guests only stay a few nights over weekends so we are doing this every week. Cupboards and drawers are emptied and cleaned. Walls washed. Fridge sanitised. Skirtings sprayed and wiped. Tops of pictures and door frames dusted. I even check it again 10 mins before they arrive lest a speck has floated onto a surface. My mums standards.

Probably more or less the same, clean but cluttered. We are both married to hoarders 😩 I am different than her because I wash my children's bedding militantly. DM washed hers but us dc only got ours washed maybe once a year. I grew up not knowing that washing bed clothes was a thing.

Ditto. Thrown in at the deep end, had to learn pretty quickly. Also cooking meals using fresh ingredients and shock horror eating fresh veg!!

Mum - clean and tidy house, didn’t work outside the home. In my childhood there was one untidy ‘lumber room’. Now all of her spare bedrooms and all cupboards are full of extra furniture and household items that should have been long gone, she’s in her 80s but the rooms in use are still clean.

Me - clean but not always tidy in the child raising years, FT job. Now tidy with tidy cupboards and little extraneous clutter. Probably less clean than her house was in its heyday, but nothing very noticeable (I hope).

Our home was awful when I was a child. There were holes in the wall, a bathroom that had bare plaster wall for years and piles of stuff everywhere. I was so embarrassed about it I could never take friends home. I was determined to always have a home my own child felt able to bring friends to and now I do.

Just to say that whilst my home as a child was pristine, my mother never played.

Mine is clean and tidy but I played with children.

my mother never played

Nor did mine. I think playing with your small children is a relatively recent innovation.

My DMs house was spotless. Everywhere shone and you weren't allowed to touch anything. She would spend hours cleaning it and weekends were spent with us being forced to join in.

My house is clean but not tidy. Lived in and everyone is welcome.

My mum was a sahm. House was always clean and tidy, and she ironed everything.

I wohm
our house is fairly clean (because we have a cleaner). Not that tidy though.

my mum does judge: especially as SIL keeps her house lovely

My mother is also a housework martyr.
Even now at the age of 80, well now she makes dad do it.
To the point that if you try to do something with them on a Tuesday they can't do it cos they're (dad) is cleaning the bedrooms. 2 of which won't have been entered since the previous Tuesday when they were cleaned.

So yeah, I'm not that person.
And there's 5 of us, me and DH work full time. So just about ok.

I'm less houseproud than my parents were when we were children but I'm much tidier than my dm is now. I'm pacing myself 😀

My mum was a SAHM my whole life living with her and now a foster carer at home most of the day. She keeps her house very clean and tidy and presentable despite having 3 children living with her and caring for my children at times and she has always been this way. I usually work full time as a nurse meaning I can be working 7 days consecutively with 2 days off and I definitely feel the need to keep my house in good order and get all the cleaning/washing done on one of my days off so that I can enjoy my other rest day. Husband does help keep house in order also when I am at work however I enjoy cleaning so am happy to do the most part. Currently off work awaiting the arrival of my 3rd little one and loving that I can clean constantly 🤣

I grew up in a clean and tidy home.
2 adults and 6 children in it. I also have a clean and tidy home.
All of my siblings have clean and tidy houses.

As a child our house was a bit cluttered as we never had enough storage space but I think it was 'dirty enough to be happy, clean enough to be safe' and this definitely applies to my own home.

My grandparents has a pretty dirty house. My Mum was much cleaner and had high standards around general household cleaning and laundry. I'm not quite up to her standards but do have some rules that are 100% from her! Like how to hang washing out and folding clothes. There's too much stuff and other messy people living in my house. I think if I lived alone I would be like my Mum.

We had a cleaner twice a week when i was growing up, in between my mum cleaned for fun. it was SO boring that I vowed I would never waste my time like that.

We have a cleaner once a week, the house is relatively tidy but I manage that more by being militant about clutter. I don't want my kids to remember me cleaning the floor for the fourth time rather than playing / engaging with them.

MiL is a martyr to cleaning, she only really gets excited when talking about cleaning products / hoovers and irons.

I have lower standards than my control-freak parents, but not that low.
DW is the same - her mum has literal OCD and her standards are a bit lower than mine, but reasonable.

I was brought up in a household where mess was not tolerated and the place kept pristine - it was stifling, I hated it. My mum didn’t work when we were young and then worked p/t throughout our teens and up until she retired. Dad was home at 4.45 on the for some they were both around far more than DH and I are as we both work f/t. We’re not slobs, far from it, but the house is certainly lived in.

Was tidier when children younger. Now about the same and understand why house was untidy - am yoo tired you tidy up and clean up after everyone as much as is needed. Dh does loads but just doesn't put things away so it gets slowly worse, even if clean, then I put everything away so its better for a while.