Frightened for dm and don’t know what to do

[JustBloodyListen]

My dm started having a bit of a niggling toothache on Friday and decided to leave it until Monday morning before phoning the dentist. By this point her face had swollen right up on one side. She saw a dentist midday on Monday and it’s an abscess but it is too inflamed for her to have anaesthetic injected so he prescribed AB’s and booked an appointment for the following Monday.

This morning she woke up with her face so swollen that he right eye is completely shut. She has a fever and is shivery and said she couldn’t hold her cup of tea because she was so shaky. She phoned the dentist who told her to phone her GP as she may need intravenous AB’s or have the tooth out under GA if the swelling isn’t going down.

DM phoned GP who tells her to phone the emergency dental number. She does this, is told she urgently needs to see a dentist but as she has a dentist she needs to phone him. So she calls her dentist back, she gets another appointment and the dentist explains that he can’t prescribe any other AB’s and he can’t remove the tooth as he cannot inject anaesthetic as it is so swollen. He tells her to relay this to the GP. She speaks to GP again who tells her that he can’t do anything as it’s dental but due to her clearly having an infection she should go to A and E at the hospital.

She gets the bus over to A and E, waits 3 hours to be seen and is finally taken in to see a doctor who tells her to call the emergency dental line (who she already spoke to and who told her to go to her dentist who told her to go to the GP). At this point my dm bursts out crying, explains it all and the doctor tells her to go back into the waiting room and he’ll see what he can do.

Another 90 minutes later and a doctor tells her that it’s likely she’ll need it out under general anaesthetic. Her local hospital doesn’t have a maxillo facial department so he’s made an appointment for tomorrow morning at the hospital 2 hours away from her house.

She is now at home with a clear infection, fever of 40 degrees and sounds barely conscious when I call her. I’ve phoned for an ambulance for her but they said it almost certainly wouldn’t arrive until the morning. She is a 5 hour drive away from me and I have children who I’d have to take with me if I left now. I don’t even have a key for her house so I don’t know what I’d do when I get there if she’s asleep/ unconscious.

What should I do? Am I overreacting? I keep looking at Google and there are so many things saying how dangerous a tooth abscess can be if untreated.

Can you call the police to do a welfare check?

Do you have the details of anyone living locally to her?

Id be very concerned that it might have become sepsis. Is there nobody on earth that's physically closer than you that can go and see her?

I’d be concerned too. What about calling a taxi to take her to A&e?

Phone her neighbour, her GP, her local friends or her church and get help to her now. Get in the car with the children and go. It sounds like she needs to be in hospital

That sounds horrific, I'm so sorry. You must feel helpless.
Do you know her neighbours? A friend?

You need to get someone to her asap. Have you got any names of her friends you can call? Neighbours? If not - call the police and get them to check on her. They will take it seriously

I’d also ring the ambulance back and say suspected sepsis

Where roughly in the country is she?

I'd be very concerned about sepsis as well. Could you ring the ambulance service back and say you suspect sepsis, to see if that will increase her priority? Contact one of her friends locally if you can, just so there's someone closer to her who's aware.

I'm horrified at that! I agree it sounds as though she could be developing sepsis. I'd be calling 999.
Best wishes to you and your mum OP

She has been spectacularly let down by the doctors. Sepsis should have been at the forefront of their mind, seeing as she had a temperature. I can’t believe the ambulance won’t be there until the morning. Atrocious.

Phone someone local who can get her to A&e or phone the police for a welfare check. I'm so sorry you are going through this and hope your mum gets help soon. 💐

Sorry I see you've already called an ambulance.

If she’s near me I’d take her now. If you’re willing to say what rough area I’m sure a MNer would help- I realise there’s a risk to that but desperate times etc. Or does she have the telephone numbers for neighbours she could manage to read to you or text to you?

I feel the same @Hatinafield. It's horrific to think of her mother having to wait for several hours for an ambulance.

what area of the country is your mother?

You are absolutely not overreacting. Shocking behaviour from the medics. Sounds like they should have sent her to the other hospital as an emergency

I'd phone police, ask for a welfare check and mention sepsis If necessary they will break in and call ambulance
I have done similar for a friend with serious heart problems

As a dentist, I can't believe that her own dentist didn't phone the nearest hospital with Max-Fac and ask switchboard to bleep the on call Max-Fac SHO. Your Mum's dentist should have told them that there were clear signs and symptoms of facial cellulitis/sepsis and IV antibiotics with GA incision /drain and extraction would most likely be needed.
Usually the patient with facial cellulitis in this scenario is sent to A&e with a letter stating that the on call Max Fac SHO is expecting their arrival. That's what should happen.
I've worked as the SHO on call and a general dentist previously and this is usually what happens.
I'm assuming your Mum is nowhere near a Dental HOspital?
I think the way forward is either for you or your Mum to ring 999 or 111 for an ambulance and keep banging on about sepsis.
It's bloody ridiculous.

Is yo

You could possibly just call ambulance and get her into hospital. Also maybe call the police who can advise further possibly triggering a procedure. Go with your gut x

I'd phone the ambulance service back and tell them it's a matter of life or death.

If they refuse again. Ask her on her local Facebook group if someone can give her a lift or pay for a taxi?

That sounds awful I'm so sorry. Does your mum have someone she is close to locally - a neighbour or a friend?

I would say - most ABs you get on prescription arent effective for at least 12 hours, so she might get some positive effect overnight.

But then again if she stays this ill, she won't be able to take a bus tomorrow. Could you book a taxi for her? And inform neighbour or friend to make sure she actually is well enough to catch it tomorrow?

If your mum doesnt have someone nearby she can entrust a key to - for future reference if you have to go zooming up there to the rescue- you can buy a key box in a DIY store with a code to unlock it, then put it somewhere discrete outside the property then either you or a neighbour or community nursery could get into the house if you gave them the code on the phone (you can then change the code afterwards).

Also some towns have community transport, you can sign up for an annual subscription and then when you need a lift to and from hospital or wherever they will organise it, worth looking into if your mum is getting older.

Your dentist is completely and utterly out of line advising your Mum to go to her GP and for them to organise hospital admission IV antibiotics etc.

If I were you I’d start travelling. Even if you take 5 hours you may still be there before the ambulance.
I called an ambulance for my DM as I suspected sepsis and they said it would be hours waiting but actually they were there in about half an hour but I’ve had instances whilst working where I’ve had to wait 7+ hours.

Hoping your dm is safe and recovers quickly.

I don’t know anyone local to her. She moved to be nearer my sister but my sister is currently working abroad and I can’t contact her. I’m in Devon, she’s in Kent. I’ve phoned a taxi for DM to take her to hospital. Is there anyone I could speak to that might speed up her being seen once she presents at A and E? I know what she’s like and she’ll absolutely play it down and could end up waiting for hours.