What can you say to people that constantly drone on about how busy they are

[LovelyYellowLabrador]

Honestly it’s like a dock measuring contest to some people
Even listing off what time they got up and all the chores and jobs they need to do

Honestly it so bloody dull !!

I think a lot of people just feel quite burnt out by life. Especially with phones, social media, constant texting it's easy to end up feeling overwhelmed and it can add extra tasks onto day to day life. You don't have to socialise with people you don't like or don't enjoy spending time with.

This just feels like another way to compete doesn't it. Some people competing by saying their busy, others are competing on this thread by saying they can do everything better/don't need to half the things others do. Everyone just one upping each other is tedious.

I think when people say "sorry I haven't been I touch" they genuinely feel guilty about not being in touch and are trying to reach out the hand of friendship? I don't think its really that deep

I know someone like this, and she also is usually 15-30 minutes late for things but it feels like it's done on purpose to show how busy she is! Ie she will say she will be round to mine at 10, and then show up at 20 past gushing about how sorry she is to be SO LATE, shes just been SO MANIC this morning etc.

I just think chill, its 20 minutes, I'm literally not at all as bothered as you think I should be 🤣 Sometimes I imagine her arriving at 9:55 and sitting in her parked car round the corner waiting until its 'late' and it makes me laugh.

Maybe stop 😬

Everytime I see DH he tells me how incredibly busy he is, and expects me to listen with great fascination to all his boring work issues. But god forbid I mention anything about my day 😐

Moaning about how busy you are to your partner will make them like you less, trust me!

I agree .

My best friend is like this and I'm getting increasingly irritated and actually hurt by it. We rarely see each other but leave voice notes regularly. I have had some difficult times recently and told her about them via voice notes as I know she is "too busy" to take a proper call. A few days later she'll reply having clearly not listened to my message. Then a few days after that if I'm lucky she'll reply saying "oh I'm sorry about X that happened two weeks ago to you but I've been so busy with..." and then she'll go on to list all the tasks she does. This will ALWAYS include things like: hoovering, cleaning the windows, the school run, sorting her wardrobe out to ebay items etc. I'm left thinking" I'm glad that me pouring my heart out about my diagnosis and explicitly saying that I would love to talk to her or get advice is less important than arranging the salad compartment in your fridge "
It's hurtful. I challenged her once on it and she didn't let me forget it for months. Passive aggressive comments on how I didn't understand how busy she was (how?! She literally lists all her chores to me every few days?!).
Honestly she's become dull. I want to chat about how we feel about things, ideas, exploring a bit deeper. But she has this overarching urge to share her household to do list.

I think we live in a society that glorifies busyness, that if you're not busy then you must be lacking somehow, your life must be dull and you're just wasting it. It's become ingrained, especially in women, that we must be constantly on the go, so it's understandable maybe that people feel they have to appear to be always doing something.

I agree, and it's always those that are the least busy that seem to talk about being busy in my experience. Most of the genuinely busy people- those that work long hours, have long commutes or a large family and house to care for don't have time to message people with their lists of chores.

Really pisses me off when she messages me apologising for not being in contact as shes so busy...she fails to see that ive not contacted her either

That's a special kind of twat right there 😂

I don't know about any one else but when I'm genuinely drowning I go dark, not blather on to people about how busy I am!

I think some people get their self esteem from being busy and end up martyring themselves in the process. Someone I used to work with liked being seen as the 'go to' person so would volunteer her services for things that weren't her remit. The result was that our department ended up swamped with calls from people looking for her help.

Fast forward twenty years to another job and she was the one that accepted a pay cut in line with her colleagues on furlough. Ended up working for same money than people off work doing nothing. Why? Just why? Has been known to put in a 60 to 70 hour week by volunteering for unpaid extra curricular activities. In all the time I have known her, has never been promoted, minimal payrises but always banging on about how busy she is. Same in her home life, doing unnecessary stuff for other people.

To be honest being told about it constantly has become a draining bore and have run out of pats on the head every time she contacts which I suspect is the reason she tells me this stuff.