Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Original poster

Would you move?

32 replies

Talulahey · 18/04/2022 09:05

Housing association House swap.

I have 4 kids. Ages 11 to 18. 3 share a room. One in box room. DP and I in middle room.

One living room down stairs.
Large grassy garden. Medium front garden with parking.
Quite a desirable are south manchester.

Have been contacted by a woman looking to down size. Area is OK but would rather be here. Is only 15 mins away though.

No front garden. No parking. Small concrete back garden (I have 3 dogs) but a park small walk away.

Now she has 4 bedrooms over 3 floors and 2 small storage rooms.

2 reception rooms.

House is considerably bigger than ours.

I just don't know

OP posts:
Original poster
Talulahey · 18/04/2022 09:16

I was hoping to get a 3 bedroom and double reception so DP and I could make 2nd reception into a bedroom and only 2 kids would have to sharewith this house we could do that and all 4 kids have their own room

OP posts:
ZeppelinTits · 18/04/2022 09:24

Instinctively based on what you've said I wouldn't, not with this particular person. I would consider swapping if the right place came up but sounds like there isn't much great about the swap place apart from space. I say this as someone living with essentially no garden/tiny concrete square and really missing having a garden so much.

GeneLovesJezebel · 18/04/2022 09:25

No.I’d need parking and a garden.

Original poster
Talulahey · 18/04/2022 09:26

I don't drive BTW so parking isn't an issue!

OP posts:
Original poster
Talulahey · 18/04/2022 09:29

@ZeppelinTits

Instinctively based on what you've said I wouldn't, not with this particular person. I would consider swapping if the right place came up but sounds like there isn't much great about the swap place apart from space. I say this as someone living with essentially no garden/tiny concrete square and really missing having a garden so much.
I thi k I would have agreed when my kids were little but now that the elsest 3 are all teens they mostly spend time in their room anyways.

I feel like them all having their own room would be a good trade off.

4 bedrooms are like gold dust. I guess I would have to see the garden myself.

It's becoming a real issues, the sharing. Their all just on top of each other

OP posts:
midsomermurderess · 18/04/2022 09:29

Given that your eldest is 18, won't they sooner rather than later be moving on the higher education or something? The space pressure will lift before you know it.

DesignMyRoom · 18/04/2022 09:30

Given your kids are already teens probably not. In 10 years are any even going to still be at home?
And then you'll be in the nice area with the garden, not regretting moving to a worse area.

Original poster
Talulahey · 18/04/2022 09:30

The rear garden

Would you move?
OP posts:
Mumdiva99 · 18/04/2022 09:33

Nope. I wouldn't. I imagine your dogs regularly use your current garden. What would their quality if life be with a tiny yard. - I know people come first but you need to think of all your needs.

HippeePrincess · 18/04/2022 09:34

Yes I would seriously moved three teens in one room doesn’t sound great.

mumofEandE · 18/04/2022 09:35

Yes IF your DC were younger but surely soon they'll start moving out and you'll be stuck in a house that is not a great fit for you
I also have a 4 bedroom house over 3 floors and I hate it!
I don't know anything about Housing Association house swaps - do people just contact others? How do they know? Is it council housing?

ifonly4 · 18/04/2022 09:35

You might not have as much room as you ideally need inside, but a garden must be a big bonus if you have the dogs (I guess you'll need to walk them more if they can't just go out in the garden). Also, it's outdoor space (other than winter) for your DC to have their friends around to play or just hang around in.

Fast forward five years one or two of your DC will have moved house, the lack of space won't be an issue forever. Also, make sure it really is the right move, you can't go back.

What do your family think?

Original poster
Talulahey · 18/04/2022 09:36

I can't see them moving out any time soon. They're not going to uni and won't be able to afford rent etc...

I cnat see anyone moving out for at least 6 years or so

OP posts:
sunshinesupermum · 18/04/2022 09:42

I would move to the larger house especially as you are realistic about your kids not moving out any time soon. How big/small compared to your current one is the garden - it's difficult to tell from the photo.

newrubylane · 18/04/2022 09:45

What's the likelihood of something more suitable coming up? How long did you wait to get this offer?

Petronus · 18/04/2022 09:47

I think I would. Three teenagers in one room is tight. The way rents and mortgages are it’s hard for young people to move out, so it’s not like you can rely on that any time soon. That yard looks nice and well cared for too.

NETSRIK · 18/04/2022 09:49

Ask the teenagers who are all sharing a room. I would move mountains to let them have their own space.

NETSRIK · 18/04/2022 09:50

Also, the photo looks like it is from a well maintained and well looked after and cared for property.

NETSRIK · 18/04/2022 09:52

@Mumdiva99

Nope. I wouldn't. I imagine your dogs regularly use your current garden. What would their quality if life be with a tiny yard. - I know people come first but you need to think of all your needs.
If people come first surely the needs of the dogs are less important than 3 teenagers sharing 1 room?
dontgobaconmyheart · 18/04/2022 09:54

I'm not sure it's fair to put someones address and photos of their garden online for all to see OP.

3 teenagers on one room sounds like it would be quite stressful for them at the ages they are. If you think nobody is likely to go to uni then surely the situation is a bit untenable? I think I'd accept I need to compromise due to my own decision to have a large family. Otherwise I would expect the DC to be working full time anyway by 18 if they have no plans for education. No reason they can't afford a house share with friends or realistically by the time it comes, partners.

They're old enough that it might be worth sitting them down and asking them what they think or would prefer and what their plans are.

Original poster
Talulahey · 18/04/2022 10:12

@dontgobaconmyheart

I'm not sure it's fair to put someones address and photos of their garden online for all to see OP.

3 teenagers on one room sounds like it would be quite stressful for them at the ages they are. If you think nobody is likely to go to uni then surely the situation is a bit untenable? I think I'd accept I need to compromise due to my own decision to have a large family. Otherwise I would expect the DC to be working full time anyway by 18 if they have no plans for education. No reason they can't afford a house share with friends or realistically by the time it comes, partners.

They're old enough that it might be worth sitting them down and asking them what they think or would prefer and what their plans are.

That was an accident. I've asked MN to remove. If you could report it too that would be great. Thanks
OP posts:
Narcoanonymoose · 18/04/2022 10:29

Don't know Whalley Range but prices on that street have gone up massively Shock isn't it up and
coming ?
Appreciate you're not buying but it can be reflective on what an area is like..

ifonly4 · 18/04/2022 10:51

Have you and DP seen the property yet? If not, go. If you have and still not sure, go and have a good look around the area ASAP and see if there are any plus points.

catoftheland · 18/04/2022 16:59

Your children could be living with you in their mid 20s and 4 bedrooms over 3 floors doesn't seem so bad (rather a bonus!) with young adults.

What do they think?

Are you allowed to / could you afford to build sheds/summer houses in your current large back garden to give the kids a chill zone type place to hang out?

Babyroobs · 18/04/2022 18:04

@Talulahey

I can't see them moving out any time soon. They're not going to uni and won't be able to afford rent etc...

I cnat see anyone moving out for at least 6 years or so

Then I would go for the move to four bed. We have four kids, eldest 23 , youngest 17 and all still at home and likely to be for the foreseeable future. My eldest has still had to return after Uni. None can afford to move out. The garden is a problem though, I guess maybe as long as the slabs are jet washed regularly if the dogs wee out there. If your dogs are anything like mine even when they have had an evening walk they still want to mooch around the garden late at night. If you moved to the new place will your kids continue to be able to go to the same schools?