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Original poster

Steralisation or snip

35 replies

ImJustMum · 31/03/2022 10:34

We have been together over 15 years, ive just turned 30 and dh is 32, we have 2 children and we dont want anymore.

Weve looked into both vasectomy and steralisation. We just want whats most likely to work, i know me having the procedure is more invasive but it seems from what ive read to be more effective. A relative of mines vasectomy didnt work and dh has read a small number of men suffer from an ache of various degrees for a long time after and i dont want him to have to suffer that after.

Its not a case of well ive had to go through child birth, he can do that, we just want whats going to be the most effective.

Has anyone had a steralisation that HASNT worked or just an opion on our situation.

OP posts:

User310 · 31/03/2022 10:37

You don’t want him to suffer an ache after you’ve varied two babies and given birth to them? As much as this is very kind of you, give yourself a break and let your partner take this one.

User310 · 31/03/2022 10:38

*carried

HellToTheNope · 31/03/2022 10:40

I got steralised when I was 27, which was 22 years ago. One of the best decisions I've ever made.

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General health

Teaforme123 · 31/03/2022 10:42

I think most work if done properly and are given the all clear before you come off BC completely. You said yourself it's only a small number who have minor issues, I think he should take this one also, you've done enough.

Original poster

ImJustMum · 31/03/2022 10:50

Oh i fully know ive done my part but my main concern is the snip not working and then i have to make the choice of suffering another pregnancy thats not truly wanted or go through an abortion, neither of which i want to do amd would be awful but both instances are something that i alone have to go through and if there is a chance a vasectomy could fail, id rather be the one to be steralised.

My mums of the opinion she knows loads of people that suffered awful periods and pain after but she cant actually name anyone. So if theres anyone that been steralised and had problems, that would be good information to know as well.

Im just weighing up our options at the moment

OP posts:

Yoohoo778611 · 31/03/2022 10:59

We had our last child in December 1984 advised by the consultant that it would be dangerous to have another pregnancy.
DH had a vasectomy in the February he got the all clear at the end of April.
Best

MartinMartinMarti · 31/03/2022 11:02

Why not both do it to make doubly sure?

Regularsizedrudy · 31/03/2022 11:04

He could get the snip and also use condoms if you’re that worried. No way would I put myself through that when the male alternative is so much easier.

GregBrawlsInDogJail · 31/03/2022 11:06

Vasectomy is both more reliable than female sterilisation and much less invasive. Unless you very strongly want to be the one sterilised yourself, it's a no-brainer.

GregBrawlsInDogJail · 31/03/2022 11:10

@ImJustMum

Im just weighing up our options at the moment

Well, for starters, your sterilisation would be more likely to fail than his.

Secondly, if you look for stories of failures and/or complications from either, you'll find them. You can't start doing things to your body for contraceptive purposes without very occasionally having it go wrong and also having it not work in rare instances. Also bear in mind that many people will be referring to procedures from many years ago when they tell these stories. For instance, vasectomy is more reliable now because they cauterise both ends of the tube instead of just cutting them, which makes a spontaneous re-attachment much less likely.

Ultimately, if another pregnancy would be a real disaster for you, you might want to double up methods anyway - say, he gets a vasectomy and you get the coil.

Original poster

ImJustMum · 31/03/2022 11:31

Thats interesting to know that steralisation has a higher failure rate. Im not looking for any failure stories specifically, im just looking for experiences both good and bad.

I cant have the coil due to a womb deformity, the depo made me put on INSANE amounts of weight and i hated the pill and was on that over a decade.

Im just trying to gather information at this point and find out if steralisation is a better option.

OP posts:

EcoCustard · 31/03/2022 13:17

No advice regarding the sterilisation but DH had a vasectomy and got the all clear after both samples. Developed a lump and ache a short while after, GP advised ibuprofen as it was a cyst which would go, if not pop back. The cyst went. I found out I was pregnant a short while after, had Dc4. He returned to the GP sent for tests which came back clear and vasectomy worked. Then in Autumn 2020 I had another positive pregnancy test, with scan confirming I was 11 weeks. After a termination and a GP change DH was referred and his discovered the vasectomy had not worked. He had the procedure again and I am on the pill. I have had my fidelity called into question by the GP, consultants and even a nurse at the clinic, except DH. it has had a huge impact on our relationship so whatever you decide, double up with other contraception or consider both.

passport123 · 31/03/2022 13:18

Female sterilisation has an annual failure rate of 1 in 200, male more like 1 in 1000 or more

MrsGHarrison87 · 31/03/2022 13:24

I had it done at 28 a few years ago. It wasn't invasive for me as I was having it done during a c section anyway. I've never regretted it, I don't need hormonal contraception and we can forget condoms. It's great.

Original poster

ImJustMum · 31/03/2022 13:41

Leaning towards us both having it done to make double sure reading some of these..

OP posts:

PragmaticWench · 31/03/2022 13:45

Good luck getting a GP to agree to your sterilisation. Our local PCT won't fund it for women, I was told DH could have a vasectomy if I didn't want any further children.

So my fertility should be decided by my husband. Unbelievable.

GregBrawlsInDogJail · 31/03/2022 13:49

Yes, a vasectomy is a lot more achievable than female sterilisation on the NHS, for two reasons: one the vasectomy is less invasive and more reliable one, and the other is that IUDs are more reliable plus reversible, and historically about 10% of women who have undergone sterilisation have subsequently sued the NHS for doing it demanding it be reversed. So you can't really blame them for not being keen when you can get better reliability and fewer risks in reversible form with IUDs and IUSs.

HellToTheNope · 31/03/2022 14:01

The failure of female sterilisation is much higher if you have it done during childbirth. I did not. I waited for more than a year after my second child was born.

passport123 · 31/03/2022 15:58

@PragmaticWench

Good luck getting a GP to agree to your sterilisation. Our local PCT won't fund it for women, I was told DH could have a vasectomy if I didn't want any further children.

So my fertility should be decided by my husband. Unbelievable.

PCTs haven't existed for over 10 years, it's CCGs - but yes, some will and some won't fund it. Clearly this isn't the decision or fault of the individual GP.

passport123 · 31/03/2022 15:59

@ImJustMum

Leaning towards us both having it done to make double sure reading some of these..

If you want the most reliable method get an implant. Failure rate 0.05%. Next best is the hormonal IUS.

cks.nice.org.uk/topics/contraception-assessment/background-information/comparative-effectiveness-of-contraceptive-methods/

Original poster

ImJustMum · 31/03/2022 18:29

I dont want to be on contraception any more, it makes my anxiety worse, gives me migranes, makes me put on weight, i feel awful on them, why should i keep filling my body with that. I dont want to be taking contraception for another 20 plus years which is why were looking for the next best and most reliable solution.

Im not sure where my gp sits on the steralisation front, i know due to my age i will have to argue in a sense for it if thats the route we go down.

OP posts:

Karwomannghia · 31/03/2022 18:42

Male sterilisation is more effective and easier to reverse.
I found that out when I went to be sterilised. They advised me to talk to dh again. He’s a wimp though so I had it done. I didn’t want contraception anymore. But also I was over 40 and had 3 kids. You may want more in future!

collieresponder88 · 31/03/2022 18:45

I have two friends that have been sterilised they both didn't realise what a big operation it was and how long the recovery would take. My Dh had the snip absolutely no probs. Was sore for about 3 days then normal. It's never gone wrong. They make you do a sample afterwards so they check it for any live sperm. After that I don't see how it would get through as they seal the tubes closed. I'd say vasectomy hands down !

RandomMess · 31/03/2022 18:51

I was really unwell after being sterilised!!

You will most likely have to pay and the snip is cheaper.

DoWhatYouLike · 31/03/2022 18:53

My husband had a vasectomy at the age of 27, after we'd had our 2 sons. He's in his 60s now, never suffered any ill effects - yes, bruising and some aching at the time, but no big deal

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