Page 4 | PIP Turned down - decision is based on absolute opposite of what I said! Help!

ItsDisneyBitch · 2022-03-23T22:56:52+00:00

I had an hour call with PIP Assessor for DD, the DLA has been stopped as of this month. The summary given has completely glossed over all the problems DD has! And contradicted all the points I have made. Has anyone appealed successfully?

Babyroobs · 24/03/2022 19:25

I would not write it based only on her worst days. By all means describe a worst day but it's important to say how often a worst day is. If all days are the same then explain that. A descriptor must apply for 50% or more of the time to apply. Get good evidence to back up what you say.

Original poster

ItsDisneyBitch · 24/03/2022 19:29

I don’t know what more evidence I can present I gave them everything. Including last camhs letter, emails, they have everything.

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Babyroobs · 24/03/2022 19:31

@ItsDisneyBitch

I don’t know what more evidence I can present I gave them everything. Including last camhs letter, emails, they have everything.

I think it doesn't help that DLA ( I think) is very easy to get and PIP is very different, different criteria etc and much harder to get. Her problems haven't changed but the criteria for the benefit help has.

Original poster

ItsDisneyBitch · 24/03/2022 19:48

So for example:

She got the bus, she had to be told how to get the bus ie bus number etc. Pay the fare, her stop.

The bus drove past her because no one told her to put her hand out.

Once the bus changed route due to an accident, she called me having a meltdown. I had to leave work and tell her to wait at a spot and collect her. This is not the type of thing a parent of a ‘NT’ child would have to deal with surely ? I don’t know this is all I know!

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Original poster

ItsDisneyBitch · 24/03/2022 19:50

They actually used that she feeds her cat as evidence. I mean for gods sake. talk about reaching.

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BOOTS52 · 24/03/2022 19:55

Can you not get someone to advocate for you from Citizens Advice as know they do that here and that will give you the support that you need. Also get a doctors letter to support the claim. They make it as difficult as possible as they are trying to confuse you and you need to stand firm and that is what the person/advocate can help you with.

Kitkat151 · 24/03/2022 19:56

@ItsDisneyBitch

They actually used that she feeds her cat as evidence. I mean for gods sake.

talk about reaching.

They will always ask about pets....our dog could be heard in the background at my last review....I just said...i never feed or walk the dog...end of...no discussion

Babyroobs · 24/03/2022 19:58

@ItsDisneyBitch

So for example:

She got the bus, she had to be told how to get the bus ie bus number etc. Pay the fare, her stop.

The bus drove past her because no one told her to put her hand out.

Once the bus changed route due to an accident, she called me having a meltdown. I had to leave work and tell her to wait at a spot and collect her. This is not the type of thing a parent of a ‘NT’ child would have to deal with surely ? I don’t know this is all I know!

Do you have to explain again each day though or is it something she can manage after a few times on her own? The bus route changing is not something that happens often surely. Can she go on the bus most of the time alone and cope with the journey?

Original poster

ItsDisneyBitch · 24/03/2022 20:02

As a rule I take her but if she practices she can.

I’m going to put in what I have and give it a go. I want to be the best advocate for her. No one more than me wants for her to be able to be independent but she just finds life hard and me constantly having to remind her to do simple things is exhausting for us both.

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Perfectlystill · 24/03/2022 20:12

F

Bagadverts · 24/03/2022 20:15

You need to explain the outcome. Did your daughter successfully cook the meal with the prompts or was that impossible?
Otherwise yes it looks like she can cook with prompting. That would still score points though.
The bus travel, having been told to put her hand out would she remember and then actually put her hand out next time?
As regards the route change. Was she dropped somewhere very near to her destination so another person would be able to walk and know the route?
are there lots of other buses that go past the stop? Is there a timetable at the stop? If you can read a timetable would it be easy to know one went to your correct stop/destination?
I can imagine some NT teens or even adults not being sure what to unless all of that correct. Might not have the skills to go online to figure out a route and possibly get pretty upset.

Peanutssuck · 24/03/2022 20:21

I'm so pleased (but not) to see that I'm not the only one. My DDs refusal for PIP was like reading about a different child ! They lied on the decision as well. I'm now at the mandatory stage, and will keep going until they overturn it. Thank you to those who have posted links

LeftieLucy · 24/03/2022 20:37

The charity CEREBRA can help with dla/pip appeals, it might be worth getting in touch

halvahalva · 24/03/2022 20:38

To be honest some of the examples you are giving, even though I understand they frustrate you don't sound that far of a generic teenager who maybe isn't that clued up on stuff. Ok, lots of teens are pretty independent and can do loads of stuff for themselves, but if you take the bus example, a good proportion of teens and even adults wouldn't manage public transport, especially if routes changed or there were other unforeseen changes. I know this is not what you were talking about it you seem to be talking about levelling up to an "averagely/smartish person" rather than the many many people who find everyday things tricky and need quite a bit of time to get into the way of them. It sounds a bit like you are thinking about smart independent 16 year olds, not average ones. I'm not saying your daughter doesn't have difficulties, obviously, but why do they require PIP?

Original poster

ItsDisneyBitch · 24/03/2022 20:55

Maybe I’m not using strong enough examples.

She just depends on me so much it seems maybe I’m perpetuating the problem.

She has a diagnosis; ADD with significant social communication difficulties. She has severe mental health issues and depression and is medicated for both.

Maybe I’m almost trying to prove that her diagnosis are valid and therefore she should get help and assistance and I’m making her worse. I could cry. I do this by myself. Am I the problem making her dependent on me?

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halvahalva · 24/03/2022 20:58

@ItsDisneyBitch

As a rule I take her but if she practices she can.

I’m going to put in what I have and give it a go. I want to be the best advocate for her. No one more than me wants for her to be able to be independent but she just finds life hard and me constantly having to remind her to do simple things is exhausting for us both.

To be honest she's only 16 and just because she finds day to day life a bit of a struggle, so do many people and it does mean she is necessarily entitled to anything. She sounds like me when I was 16. Disorganised, didn't remember basic hygiene, constantly reading the timetables wrong and missing the bus, parents sorting me out generally etc. I also couldn't manage to sort my room, let alone cooking. I couldn't way ingredients or follow a recipe. Along with school work it was too much for me at the time. I 'm now a pretty organised mum of two, working part-time. I still have to put a lot of energy into staying on top of stuff, I know probably more than many people but at no point did I think that I or my parents should be compensated for my lack of "being on top of things". It takes some people longer if those skills are particularly difficult. If she were an adult and couldn't manage to shower and wear clean clothes then you'd have a point , but she's only 16!

Kitkat151 · 24/03/2022 20:58

A diagnosis is not grounds for getting PIP.... you need to move away from that OP....lots of parents struggle to get PIP for their child at 16 after years of successfully claiming DLA....do you have a local carers service that could help you with the form?

Original poster

ItsDisneyBitch · 24/03/2022 21:02

I don’t know @Kitkat151ive been doing it all myself.

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Babyroobs · 24/03/2022 21:04

@ItsDisneyBitch

Maybe I’m not using strong enough examples.

She just depends on me so much it seems maybe I’m perpetuating the problem.

She has a diagnosis; ADD with significant social communication difficulties. She has severe mental health issues and depression and is medicated for both.

Maybe I’m almost trying to prove that her diagnosis are valid and therefore she should get help and assistance and I’m making her worse. I could cry. I do this by myself. Am I the problem making her dependent on me?

It's really hard. You don't want to not support her for fear of her being unable to cope, but then sometimes you do have to push them a little harder to do stuff. At the age of almost 20 my ds is thinking he has ADHD ( has never been diagnosed with it), but has sought help from college who give him some special help with exams etc. He struggles to sort things out himself, never cooks even the most basic of meals, he will just eat nothing rather than cook anything. It's hard to know whether it's laziness, lack of confidence etc.

halvahalva · 24/03/2022 21:05

@ItsDisneyBitch

Maybe I’m not using strong enough examples.

She just depends on me so much it seems maybe I’m perpetuating the problem.

She has a diagnosis; ADD with significant social communication difficulties. She has severe mental health issues and depression and is medicated for both.

Maybe I’m almost trying to prove that her diagnosis are valid and therefore she should get help and assistance and I’m making her worse. I could cry. I do this by myself. Am I the problem making her dependent on me?

Sorry Op, I posted before seeing this post. I didn't want to imply your daughter didn't have difficulties, just that from your previous examples she didn't sound that different from many other people who struggle. If she has a diagnosis, and other mental health issues, then she and you should be getting as much support as possible, because it sounds really difficult. It's just that I don't know whether, while your daughter is still a child, that should necessarily be monetary, rather that help and practical support from professionals. If as an adult she continues to find things difficult, then she should be able to apply in her own right. You sound like you are doing a great job and I misread the situation from your other posts.

beautifullymad · 24/03/2022 21:10

I was told to state yes or no. If you can't do it most of the time the answer is no.

Then back up each and every answer with a real life example of difficulty.

I did this for my daughter who's been awarded PIP for three years.

For those who are helping someone who is Autistic or who has mental health difficulties navigate the PIP form this is a good help:

http://www.awp.nhs.uk/media/825665/w social-carebenefitss_guide-to-pip-15-october-2019.pdf

Original poster

ItsDisneyBitch · 24/03/2022 21:10

I’ve been fighting and fighting for help for her since she was 2 years old. Her father doesn’t believe there is an issue with her. I feel like I’m going mad. in a weird way I feel like the pip people have gaslighted me. I can’t put into words the frustration and upset.

She messages me 100 times a day for reassurance and asking how to do things. I have a set up at work that I can leave if she needs help. God it’s draining. I’ve posted on here before that I’m so frightened to not help her because she doesn’t want to even be alive most of the time. I feel like PIP/DLA is ah official way of someone saying we believe you. Does that make sense or am I rambling.

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beautifullymad · 24/03/2022 21:13

@cansu

You need to be very definite. Only give examples that support what you have said. I was called once. I gave the exact answers I had put on the form. I had it copied beside me.

This.

Kitkat151 · 24/03/2022 21:13

@halvahalva OPs DD has been receiving DLA up to her 16th birthday....it’s quite normal for parents to claim on behalf of their children from a very young age ( my son got DLA from age 3) .....and then parents support their child to transition to apply for PIP after 16....the money makes a big difference in terms of support....the mistake people make is thinking that DLA and PIP are one and the same....they are not... you need to have a completely different approach when applying

beautifullymad · 24/03/2022 21:19

@Turningpurple

It so difficult. We had dps last year. His Consultant gave us lots of advice.

Including, saying something like you said there is (to them) saying she can cook.

Its so so difficult.

On my mums, they blatantly lied and said her epilepsy medication was something she just bought over the counter. Mum took her medication to the meeting and gave it to the woman to write down. So it wasn't that she got it wrong.

They also said they observed mum. Walking unaided unto the building. They didn't. Dad pulled up outside, got her to a bench and then parked the car and came back for her.

She couldn't take her walker as they do assessments in an old listed building where they can't make changes to make it accessible for people with disabilities.

The old building and the stairs are the first test! A friend of mine who can't climb the stairs was faced with stairs and no lifts. Her partner went up to tell them she was here and waiting downstairs. If you can get up the stairs to speak to them they've ticked most of the mobility boxes already.