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Original poster

Could you live in a commune?

72 replies

LaraDeSalle · 20/03/2022 14:09

It sounds like my idea of hell but I was surprised recently when one of our friends said they could see more people opting out of the rat race and living in groups of like minded people and becoming self sufficient.

I don’t meant religious or sex cults but people that would buy a share in land and build their own properties, utilising individual skills and farm the land and generate power etc with everyone taking an active part until they are physically unable to.

Not sure how it would work if anyone became unwell or injured but they would at least all be eating more healthy if living off the land!

There would of course have to be a selected leadership group and all decisions would be by voting.

I think people like me would end up wanting to kill others but I wonder if it anyone thinks they could make it work for them and would enjoy it?

OP posts:
MervynGothic · 20/03/2022 14:11

I think people like me would end up wanting to kill others

I think this would the primary barrier to a successful commune life for me as well, OP.

SouthOfFrance · 20/03/2022 14:19

Only if I was in charge Grin

Hedgesfullofbirds · 20/03/2022 14:21

I was born in just such a place, in Gloucestershire - The Whiteway Colony - but we moved away, when I was 2, when my sister was born, as the tin chalet we lived in was too small. But we moved to a very out of the way property, no vehicle access, and a half mile walk along a river bank to get to it. We lived a very sustainable life and it was a fantastic childhood, but no longer part of a commune. I still live very similarly now, but, knowing my temperament and personality quite well, after 58 years of living with myself, no way could I live within a commune - I like my personal space too much and would struggle with the inevitable politics within such a community

Hedgesfullofbirds · 20/03/2022 14:23

The Whitewaycolony is still going, by the way, but is not quite as it was

HollowTalk · 20/03/2022 14:23

I couldn't think of anything worse and I think it attracts a certain type of person that I'm really quick to avoid.

EishetChayil · 20/03/2022 14:26

My friend lives in one and it's an absolute shite palace. Dirty, smelly, populated with absolute dregs. I won't set foot there as they're all anti-vaxxers.

Nomorefuckstogive · 20/03/2022 14:28

I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately. I’m feeling disenchanted with my life and considering many options for the future. I believe I would enjoy it, TBH.

Lurking9to5 · 20/03/2022 14:33

I don't know. If I had my own room and space and only needed to do 6 hours of labour a day with no commute then maybe I mightn't mind it too much

EwwSprouts · 20/03/2022 14:33

No. I value my privacy and independence.

MervynGothic · 20/03/2022 15:07

I do know someone who lives in an “intentional community” in California. They have a (small) neighbourhood with their own family homes and a shared communal living, recreational, dining, kitchen area. They eat most evening meals together and rotate cooking duties. It is solely based on community, developing long term relationships with the others there and the children being “close”. I haven’t visited her but it seems all a bit weird and I just can’t see any big benefit, they don’t all get along and have to have meetings to air problems and manage personalities. Just seems like a lot of bother for not a lot of benefit. She still has mixed feelings about if after 15ish years there.

ChiefWiggumsBoy · 20/03/2022 15:35

I absolutely love the idea of it - but I’m definitely imagining something that doesn’t exist in reality!

IsadoraQuagmire · 20/03/2022 15:38

@SouthOfFrance

Only if I was in charge Grin
Me too. And even then I wouldn't like it. I hate sharing anything.
AlongCameBetsy · 20/03/2022 15:39

I have no desire to introduce even more people into my life.

PierresPotato · 20/03/2022 15:46

Absolutely not.
I've visited them and they are challenging ime.
Does anyone remember the island community experiment that Ben Fogle first appeared in?
Iirc the most difficult resident had been involved in communal living before.
The ones who emerged as the leaders and made it work at some level were a couple who had come together at midlife and blended their two families.
I simply don't have the social skills or energy nowadays to enable me to thrive within a large group.

Myee · 20/03/2022 15:47

Communes will always end up with somebody in full charge. That's how life no matter how egalitarian ends up.

These communal living enterprises suit a certain type of person, but I doubt they truly are "communal".

I could not hand over my autonomy, or enjoy "forced" community living for anything. But each to their own.

Hoppinggreen · 20/03/2022 15:47

No, I don’t really like people
And I really dint like people touching my stuff

BonesJones · 20/03/2022 15:48

I think its a nice idea, and could potentially work so well, but in reality would be a scaled down version of society at large. Attempts at utopias are never successful!

PierresPotato · 20/03/2022 15:49

I even find group holidays with family a bit much at times, though I kind of love them too!

FaceFullOfCake · 20/03/2022 15:55

Never again.

StormyWindow · 20/03/2022 16:00

Maybe if it was women only, I quite like the idea of that.

moonbedazzled · 20/03/2022 16:02

Would I get my own bathroom?

Frigginintheriggin · 20/03/2022 16:08

I did communal living as a young teenager. It was fun at the time.
I have a friend who is considering it at the moment.
Mid 50s with grown kids and a life partner.
I have no idea if he's interested tbh but she's certainly met with them a few times.
Doesn't float me boat now.
Living in a block of flats is difficult enough....

neverthenot · 20/03/2022 16:09

No.

GeodesicDome · 20/03/2022 16:12

God no.

A hermitage, yes.

SoftPillow · 20/03/2022 16:13

No.

But I could live collectively with a female friend and her children. We'd share some chores, do one night of babysitting for the other a week.

I could live collectively with women but not with men. I don't know why, I like men, but have no desire to share living space with them and would only be drawn to a female only community.