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Original poster

AIBU in feeling uncomfortable about this

52 replies

Peasonearthandcarrotwilltoall · 17/03/2022 06:35

I am not brave enough for AIBU and willing to accept that I am being unreasonable
But had a letter from school yesterday that has said in order to save money on coaches they want parents to volunteer to take 3-4 children swimming each week for the last few weeks of term.

I can’t do this because I don’t drive, but AIBU in feeling a bit uncomfortable about the children all being expected to travel in cars with adults they are unfamiliar with and then walked from a car park to the venue by them so the school don’t have to pay for coaches.

I don’t like the way it has been presented without a choice because I would’ve happily paid towards a coach tbh rather than relying on someone I don’t know to take dd swimming until Easter.

They are starting from next week so that’s not enough time for a dbs check, plus will the people have mot’s, insurance.
Willing to accept I’m completely overthinking this and being pfb though.

OP posts:
PeacefulPrune · 17/03/2022 06:39

Sounds very odd. I bet if you mentioned your concerns to the school a few others did, it wouldn't go ahead. I don't know how they'd get around the no DBs thing if you objected.

TonkaTruckduck · 17/03/2022 06:40

How old is dc?
I wouldn't be at all happy with this if younger, how will parents be expected to have 3 appropriate car seats etc?

Mrsbclinton · 17/03/2022 06:42

I wouldnt be happy with this arrangement either. Raise your concerns with the school.

waitingfortea · 17/03/2022 06:42

I wouldn't be happy with this and would inform the school of my feelings about it.

Sharrowgirl · 17/03/2022 06:42

This seems very unusual.

Milomonster · 17/03/2022 06:44

Wouldn’t be happy without a proper discussion.

Finfintytint · 17/03/2022 06:44

How old are the children? How will they manage car seats if needed?

ReacherMargrave · 17/03/2022 06:47

How far away is the swimming baths? Can't they walk?

Original poster
Peasonearthandcarrotwilltoall · 17/03/2022 06:47

Thank goodness it’s not just me. Children are 8/9 years old.
I didn’t even think about car seats tbh.
I honestly wasn’t sure if I was being precious about this.

I work full time so don’t really have any parent contacts so wasn’t sure if everyone else was happy with it because it’s a close knit school.

It’s a very tiny school, head teacher bit of a law unto herself type teacher (very much regret sending dd there tbh)

It was just screaming safeguarding at me and then I was thinking that I was probably being PFB and no one else was even thinking it.

OP posts:
Fifthtimelucky · 17/03/2022 06:50

This sounds very odd to me. It might be worth asking to see their risk assessment.

I'm assuming that the pool is too far to walk. One of our local schools used to ask for volunteers to walk with the children (which was about 15 minutes away from the school).

Stormwhale · 17/03/2022 06:52

Nope I would not be accepting this for my child. No way.

Lulu1919 · 17/03/2022 06:53

No I would t be happy with this
I'm a TA in a school ...15 plus hears and I've never heard of this happening
Say No

Bdhntbis · 17/03/2022 06:53

This was quite normal when I was at school but that was pre DBS for every adult involved with a child in school settings. I’d want insurance and mot checks but I’m not sure it’d really bother me if it was other parents

BooksAndHooks · 17/03/2022 06:57

Our school have done this for a residential trip rather than book coaches and I’m not happy about it at all. Who wants to be responsible for several over excited children on a motorway?

Of course no insurance of responsibility from school either as it is viewed as s private arrangement.

Itsthemaybelline · 17/03/2022 07:04

This contravenes so many codes of practice it beggars belief. Say no.

Franklyfrost · 17/03/2022 07:09

It depends how small the school is. Say it’s a class of nine children and the other eight children have parents who know each other and the kids then it’s less contact than during a play date for example and with people that they know better than at an after school club.

Peaseblossum22 · 17/03/2022 07:11

@BooksAndHooks

Our school have done this for a residential trip rather than book coaches and I’m not happy about it at all. Who wants to be responsible for several over excited children on a motorway?

Of course no insurance of responsibility from school either as it is viewed as s private arrangement.

I used to work in a school , I don’t think this is right. They are travelling to a school event I think the school does have a duty of care, it’s not a private arrangement if they have been asked to do this by the school and also if parents are being reimbursed etc
Cottonfrenzie · 17/03/2022 07:20

As a teacher I find this shocking. There's no way this is right - safeguarding - the parents will need DBS. I would email to point out the issues.

weebarra · 17/03/2022 07:24

Nope. If you're coming into unsupervised contact with children in a school capacity you surely need a DBS? I'm in Scotland and you certainly would here.

Original poster
Peasonearthandcarrotwilltoall · 17/03/2022 07:26

Thank you all. Honestly the head teacher will make me feel like I’m being over the top but I will mention it this morning. It’s a class of 30.

I struggle to get along with the head teacher she is very set in her ways.
My youngest dd at the school has Sen and she isn’t great and making reasonable adjustments for her telling me she has to live in the real world.
So she tends to make me feel like ‘that’ parent.

I’m literally asking her for things like allowances at lunch time as she will only eat a very specific diet which doesn’t meet lunchbox code. She wills only eat bland coloured foods so tends to be plain bread, plain crisps, plain rich tea biscuits but doesn’t meet school lunch box code so I just feel like the annoying parent constantly.
🙈🙈

OP posts:
supadupapupascupa · 17/03/2022 07:30

I think as long as the insurance is correct for this purpose, and the drivers have the relevant DBS checks it's fine.
I'm sure cars are used for after school football matches at ours.
I have been a driver for something long ago. But I was a governor and had the DBS check. We had the Childrens car seats and everything.

DogsAndGin · 17/03/2022 07:31

You’re right, OP. Your child should not be left unsupervised with anyone who doesn’t have a DBS, that would be illegal - even in a car!

HumunaHey · 17/03/2022 07:31

@Peasonearthandcarrotwilltoall

Thank you all. Honestly the head teacher will make me feel like I’m being over the top but I will mention it this morning. It’s a class of 30.

I struggle to get along with the head teacher she is very set in her ways.
My youngest dd at the school has Sen and she isn’t great and making reasonable adjustments for her telling me she has to live in the real world.
So she tends to make me feel like ‘that’ parent.

I’m literally asking her for things like allowances at lunch time as she will only eat a very specific diet which doesn’t meet lunchbox code. She wills only eat bland coloured foods so tends to be plain bread, plain crisps, plain rich tea biscuits but doesn’t meet school lunch box code so I just feel like the annoying parent constantly.
🙈🙈

Do not let her bully you or neglect your childs. Perhps this is something you should raise with the school governers.
ThatsNotMyGolem · 17/03/2022 07:34

Is everyone DBS checked?

Trixiefirecracker · 17/03/2022 07:35

Our village school did this. Didn’t really see a problem with it. I mean I presume you leave your kids for play dates with other families where anything untoward could potentially happen. We are a small school though and I know all the other mums/drivers.