AIBU in feeling uncomfortable about this

[Peasonearthandcarrotwilltoall]

I am not brave enough for AIBU and willing to accept that I am being unreasonable
But had a letter from school yesterday that has said in order to save money on coaches they want parents to volunteer to take 3-4 children swimming each week for the last few weeks of term.

I can’t do this because I don’t drive, but AIBU in feeling a bit uncomfortable about the children all being expected to travel in cars with adults they are unfamiliar with and then walked from a car park to the venue by them so the school don’t have to pay for coaches.

I don’t like the way it has been presented without a choice because I would’ve happily paid towards a coach tbh rather than relying on someone I don’t know to take dd swimming until Easter.

They are starting from next week so that’s not enough time for a dbs check, plus will the people have mot’s, insurance.
Willing to accept I’m completely overthinking this and being pfb though.

Big fat no.

• Insurance
• Car seats
• Safeguarding, a private playdate where you allow your child to travel in someone elses car is different to a school organised trip during school time.

Based on your description of the treatment of your younger child I would seriously look for a new school.

@Peasonearthandcarrotwilltoall

Thank you all. Honestly the head teacher will make me feel like I’m being over the top but I will mention it this morning. It’s a class of 30.

I struggle to get along with the head teacher she is very set in her ways.
My youngest dd at the school has Sen and she isn’t great and making reasonable adjustments for her telling me she has to live in the real world.
So she tends to make me feel like ‘that’ parent.

I’m literally asking her for things like allowances at lunch time as she will only eat a very specific diet which doesn’t meet lunchbox code. She wills only eat bland coloured foods so tends to be plain bread, plain crisps, plain rich tea biscuits but doesn’t meet school lunch box code so I just feel like the annoying parent constantly.
🙈🙈

She sounds awful. In my 15 years teaching I've never heard member of staff say that a child with SEND needs to 'live in the real world.'

How's her teacher? I would worry about the culture of the school with that sort of comment

@Trixiefirecracker

Our village school did this. Didn’t really see a problem with it. I mean I presume you leave your kids for play dates with other families where anything untoward could potentially happen. We are a small school though and I know all the other mums/drivers.

It is within a school context. The head should not be doing this.

This is how my small primary did trips out in the 1990s! I thought it was strange back then so surprised it's even being mentioned nowadays. I would not be happy about this.

Parents are not insured to do this. Heaven forbid there's an accident, personal car insurance wouldn't cover this.

Some children will need a car seat so how would that work?

Obviously, safeguarding would be a major issue... have the parents been DBS checked?

I'd be giving the Local Authority a phone call to check its stance on this.

We have done this to take Year 2 to a one-off activity day. Parents basically had the choice to take their own child, arrange a lift for them (with no organising from the school; purely personal arrangements) or the child could join Year 1 for the afternoon. I think it's fine for a one-off.

For a regular thing, I don't like it at all. Better to ask parents whether they want to take their own kid (or friends etc) or whether they can pay for transport. Depending on how many kids vote to pay, hire a mini bus or a taxi and a teacher take them.

In my youth group, we're DBSed anyway, and need appropriate insurance, and yes some 8-9 yo's need booster seats so that needs configuring appropriately. Then you get issues with children who've come off booster seats slightly prematurely and won't have it that they're legally too small and it's the driver who's liable if there's any issues.

Viable on a well-planned day trip. Highly likely for something legal to go askew on a class scale.

Absolutely bloody not. Make sure you send an email to the head (so there is a trail), make sure all the facts are clarified in the email, and ask for a response by the end of the day so that you have time to escalate further before the trip.

No way should this happen. Not safeguarding the children. Ask to speak to designated safeguarding lead (which may be the headteacher!) Parents could be leaving themselves open to accusations in this situation well as not safeguarding the children. I asked our DSL about 6th form coach giving my DS and friends a lift home. She said he ought not to have offered as leaving himself in potentially difficult position. The head is asking parents to put themselves in this position as well as completely ignoring duty to safeguard the pupils (as well as overlooking the valid insurance, although not sure what category it is, car seats, MOT etc)

Absolutely no way would I be letting my child in a car with a parent I don't know.

No way would I allow that either. It's a school organised thing, in the curriculum and they have to budget for it.
Car insurance, car seats, DBS etc for all involved too as it's a regular thing.

Not a chance in hell I would allow this. Speak to other parents as well. I would escalate to governors if they are still going ahead.

That is very strange. If something happens while the children are in the car, who is liable? Also if the school can't afford coaches, that surely shouldn't mean parents are expected to ferry kids around...

My 2 youngest children go to a really small school, and we don't have a mini bus or hire coaches. In the last week, there has been 3 tournaments outside of school. No transport provided so either parents take/ collect their own children, or you arrange for someone else to. The last one was collect from school at 12.30 and pick up from the tournament at 3.45- 2 towns along.

When I was on The PTA we all had to be DBS checked to even set foot in school. We were allowed while the application was ongoing but until it came back we had a different coloured lanyard and had to be accompanied by someone who did have a DBS at all times
I find it really odd you would be allowed let alone asked to take children in your car during school hours. Major safeguarding issue

This has happened many times for trips with our small village school. I presume it must be allowed in some circumstances, as our head is definitely focused on safe guarding etc.

If you're wary of the HT could you approach the governors? Specifically the ones involved in safeguarding or the Local Authority?

The LA may be unaware of her plans.

This was totally normal for my school in the nineties as we didn't have mini buses or anything. All lifts to trips were with other parents.

I can't see it being okay now though.

It won’t happen because there will not be enough volunteers m, either because others have the same concerns as you, or don’t want to waste money on fuel or don’t have the time etc.

Other parents won’t allow their child to go in someone’s else’s car so the idea will fall flat on its face.

If the school is asking the parents then they need DBs checks I'm sure. If they just say get your own kids there and make your own arrangements they don't.

I wouldn’t say a class of 30 was small (even if school is). They’ll need 7/8 parents to drive them every week. I can’t see how this is sensible or allowed? I mean aside from the “being alone with another adult” issue what about car safety? Insurance mot road worthiness of car. Most at that age will need car seats - who will be providing and fitting those each week? What will the parents do for the hour they are in the pool - they won’t be allowed in the changing rooms etc surely. Will the teachers be driving in their own cars? If so will they also be taking 3/4 children in their personal cars? I can’t believe many teachers would be comfortable with that really.

I’d object and query with school. I just wouldn’t be happy sending my 8/9 year old off in the car of an unknown adult whose driving ability is unknown to me.

I think this scenario is very different to say a school saying their is a running event on at X place but pupils would need to make their own way to the venue or we will be going on a residential but children need to be dropped off at the location. This is a weekly school lesson parents shouldn’t be driving the children.

I would be removing my child from swimming lessons if that were the arrangement being made. No DBS checks, what about need for liability insurance/possibly business insurance as conveying other people’s children as part of their school day, who is checking for appropriately fitted car seats in each car? What happens if parents drop out at the last minute or their usual car isn’t available?

I used to take a small group of SEN children to a local pool with another staff member via minibus.
The risk assessment for that alone was a pain and involved everything from ratio's to the walk from the bus to the baths as the car park was a distance away.
For 30 kids that is a lot of parents and a lot of individual assessments, starting with getting them to the pool from the car and before you factor in DBS, car seats, insurance etc.
The whole idea is batshit.

We did this with one trip - which was about a week after I'd collected DC from school for a competition and then driven behind his TA all the way there - I wasn't allowed in, the TA was supervising on site but she wasn't allowed to drive them without another adult in her car, she wasn't allowed to be a passenger in my car - anyway we were asked to take the kids to a local site. One parent pointed out her child was highly allergic to all sorts and could school guarantee the parent driving her child would have a clean enough car. Another pointed out the kids would need car seats and what were they doing about that. Only DBS parents could volunteer but it felt like all sorts of wrong.