Do you think it’s good to try and look your best most days ?

[LovelyYellowLabrador]

Not every single day, we all need a duvet day form time to time
But just in general
?

I guess so, but there are so many other things one is supposed to achieve in a day that "looking good" slips down the priority order for many people.

@ZZTopGuitarSolo

I read threads like this and realise I'm actually a man when it comes to things like 'looking my best'.

Clean body/hair/teeth, appropriate clothes, ready to go wherever needed.

Same here. Some people's 'every day bare minimum' is more than I would do for a big night out or my best friend's wedding.

OP 'looking your best' is fine if you enjoy the effort that putting on make up, hair styling etc requires but not if you resent the time that it takes or are being pressured into dressing up by a partner. It's absolutely fine and not a sign of depression or whatever to wear easy to wear a clean face, comfy clothes and tie your hair back if that's what you want to do.

I think this is an age thing.

When l worked l was always made up and smart.

Since retiring..,,, I’m not sure where my make up bag is, l prefer myself without it. Hair is clean, nails filed, but that’s it. The relief at not having to faff. And yet l used to love wearing make up when you get.

I brush my hair and clean my teeth and that's it. Looking my best - whatever that is - really couldn't be less important to me.

@ArseInTheCoOpWindow

I think this is an age thing.

When l worked l was always made up and smart.

Since retiring..,,, I’m not sure where my make up bag is, l prefer myself without it. Hair is clean, nails filed, but that’s it. The relief at not having to faff. And yet l used to love wearing make up when you get.

Doesn’t it depend on your job?

Not an age thing!
I'm 70 and I think its very important that my clothes are fashionable and smart, I do not want to look like an aged bag lady or some little old granny type. (However neither do I want to look like mutton dressed as lamb)
The older you get the harder it is and the longer it takes.
I would never leave the house without make up its important to me to make the best of dwindling resources

Thanks for all your thoughts on this
I think I want to try and aim for a minimum standard say tinted moisturiser mascara clean hair not tangled and just put up 🙊🙈

So where should o start? Maybe throw away old clothes with holes in ?

Perhaps I need some smarter more comfortable work out clothes and lounge wear
As when I go fgm I wear old leggings that are too small for me and a scruffy old baggy t shirt
And i truest look my worse ! Enough to put me off going which is daft
Perhaps I need to start here

I make an effort for work every day (Mon-Fri). A bit more relaxed on Saturday unless I'm going out, then I make more effort. Sunday is usually make up free but still clean but comfy clothes.

@LovelyYellowLabrador

Thanks for all your thoughts on this I think I want to try and aim for a minimum standard say tinted moisturiser mascara clean hair not tangled and just put up 🙊🙈

So where should o start? Maybe throw away old clothes with holes in ?

Perhaps I need some smarter more comfortable work out clothes and lounge wear
As when I go fgm I wear old leggings that are too small for me and a scruffy old baggy t shirt
And i truest look my worse ! Enough to put me off going which is daft
Perhaps I need to start here

Are you doing it for yourself OP or has someone said something that makes you think you should?

I have certain standards that I won't break, but no I'm not looking my best every day.

I'd have to be very ill indeed not to shower and wash my hair daily. I always "blowdry" my hair, but it's a short manageable style that takes seconds. I don't leave the house without "makeup" but that's essentially a bit of concealer and lip balm.

Clothes are always in good condition and clean, not always stylish

My nails are always trimmed and clean

Even when I am "my best" I refuse to wear anything uncomfortable and will wear something practical for the situation in preference to that which looks best.

Showered, teeth and hair brushed and clean clothes that aren’t just pyjamas/tracky bottoms/leggings are the minimum standard for me to feel I’m participating in life not just existing. I’ve trained myself out of thinking that a full face of makeup is needed though.

My priorities are that I'm clean, warm and dressed practically for the task. I am cold all the time so that's something that I am constantly battling.

I do like to look nice on occasions but long ago gave up on heels and fancy hair and fussy dresses. Can't walk in heels. Hair best left without products and I look daft in 99% of dresses. Some people look amazing all dolled up but I just look like a bit of a twit. Stopped wearing makeup 9 years ago. I do feel good if I look nice, there's no doubting that it lifts your spirits.

I am probably somewhere in the middle. I scrub up fairly well. I am always clean and tidy. Wouldn’t dream of wearing clothes with holes or stains on, even in the house.
If going out I will wear a little make up and nice clothes. Not particularly dressy but always try to look put together, even in jeans and top. However, I workout a lot so at home I tend to live in leggings and t shirt, maybe a hoody or jumper in winter.
I think there is a difference between casually dressed and looking like a slob. I feel holes and stains are a step too far for me personally. However, I do love a PJ day. Don’t happen very often though

Oh and I refuse to wear anything uncomfortable so no super tight clothes or high heels

I never go out without having decent hair, make up. Nails done every three weeks and hair cut every 10.
Even if I'm just walking the dog, I'll do this but wear appropriate clothes - jeans, jumper, jacket, walking boots but my hair and face is done. I'm 51. Doesn't take long and makes me feel better about myself. I'd feel dreadful bumping into anyone I know if I was out looking dishevelled.

Fatgalslim I’d say for me
Reflection on these comments
Im wondering if I’m perhaps a bit of a slob ! 😵🙊

Going to start by chocking thing's with holes in out !
But I seriously need to buy some new clothes too

Important to be clean and tidy, sure but I don’t think anyone needs to cake their face in make up every day and spend hours doing their hair. I’ve always preferred a more natural look so wear minimal make up but keep my hair tidy. I don’t wear leggings unless I’m running or working out and have never owned a tracksuit.

Yeah, I think that the overall sentiment is correct. What that looks like will vary between different people.

But when people stop caring about things like basic grooming, presenting themselves in a way they feel is acceptable, and so on, it's often a sign of mental health deteriorating. That can be at a pretty low-key depressive level, and many people who have suffered from that will have experienced it - right up to people with serious psychotic breaks may stop personal care altogether. When you have people like this, one of the early signs medications or treatments are working can be they start to do self-care, with men it's often shaving off or trimming a beard.

@LovelyYellowLabrador

Thanks for all your thoughts on this I think I want to try and aim for a minimum standard say tinted moisturiser mascara clean hair not tangled and just put up 🙊🙈

So where should o start? Maybe throw away old clothes with holes in ?

Perhaps I need some smarter more comfortable work out clothes and lounge wear
As when I go fgm I wear old leggings that are too small for me and a scruffy old baggy t shirt
And i truest look my worse ! Enough to put me off going which is daft
Perhaps I need to start here

I would say go with any minimalist make-up routine that makes you comfortable. The nice thing about tinted moisturizer is lots of people need something for dry skin and sun protection anyway, so if you want a little evening out it's not an extra step and it looks pretty natural.

But I would agree, if you want more casual types of clothes, get ones in good repair that fit. You will feel much more presentable.

I’m not willing to devote a lot of time to my appearance. As a woman I’m already expected to add hours more of childcare, housework and caring responsibilities than the average man and I’ll be damned if I’m throwing more of my life away looking good to justify my existence on the planet.

But it’s easier to get on in life if you don’t stand out too much so I have simplified things as much as possible. My advice on where to start is

• get a good low maintenance hairstyle
• throw out clothes that don’t flatter/ match/ fit/ are damaged
• simplify your clothes so that they all go together more or less, or at least each item can be worn with multiple things.
• figure out what matters most (texture? Fit? Colour? Trend?) and from there figure out your natural style (formal/ casual/city chic … names vary) and go with that rather than trying to force yourself against your natural inclinations.
• get a good coat every few years.

I like to look my best. If im home all day i wear leisure wear but its nice. Not tatty old clothes. And no make up.

Otherwise i wear nice clothes to work and make up.

Thanks for the great advice
I think I need to start with a list of basic stuff I need
And get some smarter loungewear for the house well at least one set
Maybe something matching in a lightish colour

@LovelyYellowLabrador

And I don’t mean dolled up to the nines more hair done, ok clothes, not dirty or crumpled, or is disrepair

That’s different to ‘looking your best’ then. My ‘best’ takes 2 hours. Getting ready for work takes 10 mins.

It is not important to have your hair ‘done’, but it is important that it is washed and brushed.

It is important to be hygienic.

God no. I wash my arse, wear clean clothes and brush my hair. That's enough