Ex husband dies

[Mayday3378]

Ex husband died a month ago, my sons birthday coming up my current husband wants us to stick to the same amount for his children and mine, however the sc receive monetary gifts from their bio mother and her family, my children don’t receive from their fathers side and now won’t from their father, I feel I would like to give extra to cover my childrens fathers contribution as he cannot, my current husband disagrees, wants us to continue to both cover the same previous amount is this fair? Aibu?

Just realised that your dcs are older teens/young adults.

I think that it changes things.
They will have different needs (depending on what they do/Uni/life choices etc etc)
They will also have access to different keel of support/wealth (death if grand parents etc….).

Just as well as when you have young dcs, it seems fair enough to keep it all the same, now, i think the situation is different.
First of all, they will not know what each of them will be getting for b’days etc…
But also even in no blended family, it’s not unusual that people get different amount if money from parents due to different needs (eg one adult child gets into financial trouble/looses their job/separates etc…).
For me this is the point when each of you should do whatever feels right with ‘your money’