Darling/Babe/Hun - Genuinely interested

[SchoolRunsAreNotFun]

Genuinely interested to get other MN’s opinions on being called the words ‘darling’ or ‘babe’ etc...

I have to admit I’m definitely one to call people ‘lovely’ and my close friends ‘babe’ eg. ‘hi babe just checking in to see how you are...’
I think this stems from my mum and family. My mum will call absolutely anybody ‘darling’ including people her age/older than her.

Interestingly we’ve never been a ‘hun’ or ‘honey’ type of family. Really not sure why.

What about everyone else?

I hate them all, but 'hun' is by far the worst. It sets my teeth on edge!!!!

DP calls me darling mostly. I call the DC sweetheart, poppet….

Don’t use babe or hun. Occasionally call the DC baby, especially if they’re poorly and need a bit of babying.

I can’t stand hun. Every man who’s ever called it me uses it first as an insult. Online men who call it me, I avoid. Sets my teeth on edge as well

Beaut is a common one my friends use. Hi beaut, how are you ?

It really doesn’t bother me, for some reason I find it more uncomfortable when people use my name instead…I know that’s weird!

@Clarice99 out of interest why do you hate them all?

If it’s a close friend/family/partner then it’s no problem - presumably you’re close enough to that person to say ‘don’t call me that’ if you dislike it. I don’t really like colleagues/strangers/people I don’t know we’ll calling me babe/hun/etc. I think it can come off a bit patronising if you don’t know someone.

Awful. Make me cringe, all of them.

I do call my kids babe or hunny bunny or any other weird name though 😂 don’t think ds appreciates it anymore! DD calls me mumsy bumsy which I think is affectionate.

From people I know, I don't mind.

From randoms in the street, no thanks. I hate it. Although I used to find myself doing it loads in work. I had to calm people down and would call then sweetheart, like I was talking to my kids.

Another thing - I do think tone and context matters. For example if I fell down at the shops and an older lady said ‘ooh are you already love?’ Then that’s nice.

If I was serving a customer (this has actually happened) and he sneered ‘I don’t have all day darling.’ Then that’s an arsehole.

alright

@NameChanger45465465 yes we use beaut too but babe or lovely seem to be the most common in our group

I don't use any of them except to my children.

I don't mind real actual friends using them to me but I can't abide it from strangers, customers, tradesmen, shop assistants, colleagues etc

I think as long as the intent is friendly, rather than patronising, then I quite like it.

At some point in my late teens/early twenties I was spending time with a more flamboyant/theatrical crowd and so started calling everyone "sweetie" or "sweetheart" and it's kind of stuck. Even though occasionally a little voice in the back of my mind starts quoting lines from ab fab in response.

I call my kids babe, munchkin, nugget…lots of different pet names.
My boyfriend often uses babe or baby and I’ve never really given it a second thought.

I have a long standing friend who uses hun and I haven't the heart to tell her that it's hon. Honestly the spelling of it winds me up.

I do use lovely, lady, babe sometimes with girlfriends.

I can see why some people don't like them so I'm judicious in my use!

Dislike being called Babe, Babes or Hun and will ask people not to.

Darling - depends on who says it and how, but generally don't like it

Arghhh hate being called Babe, my sister snd a friend does it. Hate hate hate it

I don't really notice, it's really meaningless for the most as it's just said quickly and without much thought in shops et al.

Darling and lovely between DP and I
I use darling and poppet for my niece (age 3), lovely sometimes for my nephew (age 13).

I just can’t pull off “babe” or “hun”

None of them bother me really as they’re all said with kindness but lovely makes me flinch a bit. Don’t know why.

I definitely think the etiquette is not to call your elders anything like that. A fried who’s a few years older maybe but for the most part it’s an absolute no no. It’s patronising and disrespectful(to me).

I got called babyluv the other day. That exact spelling.

DP calls me hun a lot. "Hun, don't worry, I'll sort it out". If he uses my first name instead, I know he's annoyed.

I don't use any endearments in reference to him. TBF, I barely use his either.

Family don't use any.

Hun, some of my friends use it, but think "chick" is more common. "You all right chick?"

My mother advised calling all men darling- then you don't have to remember the names. (I wouldn't say it's always wise to follow her advice, mind you.)

I was messaging a guy on OLD who started with, "Hi Emzy how's your day?" I have no idea what made him thought it was okay to call me that, rather than Emma, and he is now aware of that and said "At least I didn't call you baby or honey," so he appears to have some awareness.

I wouldn't bother commenting on things like, "here's your change, love," because I suspect people serving in shops and so on do it with every and are barely aware of doing it. But I would be unhappy about it from someone at work, or my friends, who know my name.

I suspect that there could be certain circumstances in which I would accept a man calling me almost any name, but it's a long time since I've been that close to anyone, and in the past, they just used my name. But as a general rule, I prefer no petnames.