Simple maths question...

[Onlyrainbows]

If my DHs income is 35% of mine, does that mean he'd always pay 35% of all outgoings? (Rather than 50%)

When people talk about Spending money I find it quite strange. It's almost as if it's allocated to be spent, not just there in case you wish to purchase something.

It is. Some people choose to spend it. Some choose to save it. It's why some people end up with 'savings'.

OP if he has an addiction that takes amounts out of your income, and he can't control it, you need to rethink the whole relationship.

@AlisonDonut

When people talk about Spending money I find it quite strange. It's almost as if it's allocated to be spent, not just there in case you wish to purchase something.

It is. Some people choose to spend it. Some choose to save it. It's why some people end up with 'savings'.

OP if he has an addiction that takes amounts out of your income, and he can't control it, you need to rethink the whole relationship.

It's a bit of a grey area, is it mine, is it still his? What is true is that the household could have benefited from that money. He did come to this relationship with exactly the same amount of debt, so at least he hasn't increased it. He was definitely in denial for all of these years, and he's never had the chance to get better in that way. If there's a constant with him is that he's always shown a willingness to improve, and he's definitely gotten better over the years.

When people talk about Spending money I find it quite strange. It's almost as if it's allocated to be spent, not just there in case you wish to purchase something

Some people might look at it that way but the intension really can be that it's there just in case you want something. Or it can be saved for a bigger purchase later.

You'd be a bit daft to think 'I have this money, what can I buy' and then buy something for the sake of it, only to find that later you want something and don't have the money because you've spent it because it was there.

Or the spending money is there and gives you 'permission' to spend it.

So many people, mostly women it seems, often say 'I never spend anything on myself' or 'I can't justify buying this for me' but if you go through your budget and allocate money to different needs and wants and that includes a pot of money that you are 'allowed' to spend and you want something and there is money in your spending pot, it's affordable and you should buy it if you want it.