A thread for people disappointed they didn’t get engaged today?

[TwoCoffeesPlease]

I know I’m not getting engaged today.

We have talked about marriage and DP is on board and has said he will propose. To me it is the next thing and I don’t know what we are waiting for. To him I know he has some stressful things going on this year and the idea of getting engaged now and planning a wedding would create another one (and I shot myself in the foot a bit by saying I don’t want a long engagement).

So, I KNOW I am not getting engaged today. Still feel sad and disappointed though!

Anyone else?

If you've been together years and already have a house, then he isn't proposing. Sorry.

@formalineadeline I agree. I asked DH out (we were 21). He took some time and one day said to me something about: you know it would be lovely to spend the rest of my life with you. Then at the end of that year when he was heading to med school we had a ‘timeline’ conversation (I was going to grad school for a PhD as well) and agreed to get married just as he was finishing residency (so in nine years’ time- we were 22). So really quite young. And we stuck to that. There was no ‘proposal’. We considered ourselves to be each other’s fiancé/fiancee. We’ve been together 21+ years with kids. Not a single day goes by where I contemplate if my life would have been enhanced by him going down on one knee with a ring. Or if our marriage would have been stronger.

Critically from that conversation to the day we got married I had NO DOUBT that he was utterly committed to the timeline. I think we even told our parents and started planning at the start of his last year of residency. No will he/won’t he moments.

What happens if you get to 32 and he doesn’t propose?

DH would tell him to get engages a few days after Valentine's Day-it's much better value.
We got engaged a few days before and the price of flowers etc is noticeably higher than a few days afterwards.

I was 31 when I got married- 22 when we decided. Early 40s now. Genuinely never spent time wondering about his commitment, the ring or any of that. When we did get married we had a ring conversation and we both agreed we wanted plain rings. So we have wedding bands. On our 10th anniversary DH did ask if I wanted something fancier and I said no but I won’t mind some nice earrings. So that’s what I got.

Agree with formalineadeline Every part of our engagement/marriage was a joint decision, and once we'd properly talked about getting married then we both went out at the first opportunity and bought a ring. It was no less exciting. I have to say, every man I've known who's dragged his feet, in all honesty, didn't want to get married.

Me. 34 years and the bastards still not asked me. At this rate I'm going to have to ask him but I might give him a few more years yet

I'd be so disappointed with a valentines proposal

I told DP no valentines, no birthday, no Xmas, no nye

It ended up us being drunk in a hotel room but it was perfect because it was just us

I find this a bit baffling to be honest. If you’ve agreed to get married, then you are already engaged. If you want a romantic, public proposal.....propose to him. If he finds wedding planning and organising stressful and overwhelming- set a date and do it yourself with the help of relatives/friends. It just sounds like you may be both overthinking things. You are engaged.