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Original poster

WWYD about this money

65 replies

thinnerdinner · 12/02/2022 16:41

I work as a freelancer with no regular income and have to dip into my savings every now and then. DS has a steady job with a good income. I recently spent hours researching and applying to an ‘aid’ which is a good lumpsum amount.

I want to use it as my personal savings and spend it on DC and myself as I don’t know when my next project/income will be. DH thinks we should pay the annual tax with it (he usually pays for it himself). Who is right and WWYD?

OP posts:
LittleOwl153 · 12/02/2022 16:46

Alot depends on how you usually use money - and what happens when you have no income - and what the AID was actually supposed to be used for when you applied surely?

Riverlee · 12/02/2022 16:49

Not quite sure what ‘applying to an aid’ is and how that translates to money.

Do you mean ds or dh has a steady job?

Is dc’s your dh’s child?

Does dh usually pay for everything? Does your money contribute to household bills?

Can you compromise, and use some of this money as treat money, and some to go to the tax bill?

Original poster
thinnerdinner · 12/02/2022 16:50

The aid is quite generic, (without going into details) it doesn’t stipulate a purpose and is meant to be used as a compensation.

Normally we keep our finances separate, I use my savings when I need to, DH pays for the stuff he uses and bills and taxes paid from a joint account. The joint account usually has enough money to pay taxes every year, but not for the last two years as my income has dipped. DH has been paying the taxes the past two years.

OP posts:

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General money
Original poster
thinnerdinner · 12/02/2022 16:50

Apologies - DH has the steady job!

OP posts:
Casheeeew · 12/02/2022 16:52

If your DH has been covering for you financially for the tax for a couple of years then it sounds like that's where the money should go, it's up to him to write that off or not surely?

BreakingUpWithMyPhone · 12/02/2022 16:52

I think it's hard to say w/o understanding what 'the aid' is. Is it a charitable thing?

Original poster
thinnerdinner · 12/02/2022 16:56

@Casheeeew

If your DH has been covering for you financially for the tax for a couple of years then it sounds like that's where the money should go, it's up to him to write that off or not surely?
That’s what he thinks.

But I guess I am finding it unfair as he didn’t even know about the existence of this aid and I found it and spent hours applying for it. He was going to pay the tax last week and suddenly he is all interested in this money. I just feel it’s unfair on all the effort I put (I know family - equal sharing etc but am still a bit annoyed).

OP posts:
LIZS · 12/02/2022 16:56

If he normally funds the tax and has no difficulty in doing so (yours or his? not clear) it should be extra income. What is the aid? Will you get the funding?

Original poster
thinnerdinner · 12/02/2022 16:57

@BreakingUpWithMyPhone

I think it's hard to say w/o understanding what 'the aid' is. Is it a charitable thing?
It’s related to DC, but to be used by parents, so we are both equally entitled I guess!
OP posts:
Haus1234 · 12/02/2022 16:57

Is the tax bill just yours or is it shared? If it’s yours then of course you should pay it!

Original poster
thinnerdinner · 12/02/2022 16:58

@Haus1234

Is the tax bill just yours or is it shared? If it’s yours then of course you should pay it!
It’s a shared bill.
OP posts:
Riverlee · 12/02/2022 17:07

If the aid relates to the dc, surely it should be used for the purpose you were awarded it for?

However, if dh has been supporting you during your irregular work, then surely it’s fair you support him also. You may have put the hard work in to get this money, but he works hard throughout the year.

TigerLilyTail · 12/02/2022 17:11

Can you split it? Half to taxes, half to savings?

Original poster
thinnerdinner · 12/02/2022 17:24

It isn’t that big an amount. Tax will cover all of it.

OP posts:
TigerLilyTail · 12/02/2022 17:30

I meant you pay half of the tax, he pays half.

Does he have any savings?

If he has savings but you have none, it's not really fair. If he's broke and you have savings, it's not really fair. Things should be proportionate.

Billandben444 · 12/02/2022 17:32

I'm not sure it's fair to expect him to pay your tax because you can't afford to when you can afford to.

TabithaHazel · 12/02/2022 17:39

@thinnerdinner

The aid is quite generic, (without going into details) it doesn’t stipulate a purpose and is meant to be used as a compensation.

Normally we keep our finances separate, I use my savings when I need to, DH pays for the stuff he uses and bills and taxes paid from a joint account. The joint account usually has enough money to pay taxes every year, but not for the last two years as my income has dipped. DH has been paying the taxes the past two years.

So does your DH pay for all bills plus rent/mortgage normally? It does seem a little unfair unless there is going to be a massive drip feed and you can't work regularly because you are disabled/a full time career etc
Original poster
thinnerdinner · 12/02/2022 17:48

No, the joint income (from rent) covers bills, mortgage etc. It’s my property that pays the rental income but I treat it as ‘joint’. I have no other savings sadly. He has savings and pension from his job.

OP posts:
Zilla1 · 12/02/2022 17:56

So if your DH has been covering more of what used to be joint bills (the shared tax) because your income 'dipped' for a couple of years then I don't think it is unfair that this aid will be used for the joint expenses, especially if the basis of it being awarded is relating to your DC.

TigerLilyTail · 12/02/2022 17:57

If he has savings then he should help you out. It's shitty of him to take your money off you when you make a lot less and he has a good job.

Original poster
thinnerdinner · 12/02/2022 18:17

Hmm really differing opinions on here as well! It does sound unfair to me as I have no savings, but I also see the pov that he has been helping out with joint tax bills..

OP posts:
Billandben444 · 12/02/2022 20:49

No savings but you own a property that you rent out?

Pembertonrd · 12/02/2022 20:53

If you are paying the rent he should pay the tax.

Zilla1 · 12/02/2022 20:55

What would be the difference between your DP giving you money to put in your savings and them paying the joint tax bill your both previously paid so you can put this 'aid' into your savings? If you don't expect the former, why does your DP not agreeing to the latter feel unfair?

OnaBegonia · 12/02/2022 21:02

Is it Child Benefit? Why the cloak and dagger vagueness?

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