Another thread about proposal ultimatums made me think of this.
I started a thread on AIBU a few years ago complaining that my lovely bf flat out refused to marry me after 8 years together saying that he was 'not ready' or 'too young'. The unanimous response was LTB. Although I had already know deep down that I had to LTB for about 2 years at that point, I genuinely feel that it was that thread that was the final straw that actually made me do it. It took me another year, and I was miserable after I broke up, but I've gone back to it many times to remind myself that I was doing the right thing. A lot of it was confirmation bias of course, I kind of needed strangers on the internet to ratify what I already knew. When I showed the thread to my then partner, he was convinced that everyone was actually agreeing with him! But his conclusion was the same as mine - that we should move on, sad as that might be, as we wanted different things.
It also surprises me how spot on the mumsnetters were at predicting what would happen next! I took the leap and started an overseas posting at work (something that my ex was flat out against), made amazing friends, had loads of flings. I met my new partner a few months later. Everything felt uncomplicated. A month ago, 2.5 years into the relationship, I told him I'd like to get married. There was no fuss as we'd been discussing it all along like grownups, without him being 'freaked out' or 'scared off'. We now have a date set for August.
I read some threads where the only logical option for the OP is to LTB and it feels quite B&W, such as my situation where we were young, had no kids and wanted completely different things. I always wonder if any of these women do leave, or if they stay on in misery. Or am I the only one who was actually dumb enough to LTB because mumsnet said so? 