Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Rules you had in your childhood that now seem bizarre?

999 replies

Tattted · 05/02/2022 17:20

As a child/teen living with my parents we were actively discouraged from showering/bathing everyday. It was really frowned upon and seen as unnecessary and probably a bit extravagant. I know probably as a young child I didn’t need to but as I got older and even after I turned 18 and was still living at home they would have been a bit annoyed about it if I wanted to shower everyday . I should say where we live has no water charges so it wasn’t about that. Now as an adult and a mother myself it seems so strange. I realise it’s probably because my parents both came from large families that had very little money and, back then, no hot running water. Even know my parents bath weekly but sink wash every day.

OP posts:
Benjispruce5 · 06/02/2022 08:38

@Juletide my parenting would wrap their present to me and that would be under the Christmas tree. It was just the Father Christmas (never Santa) presents that were unwrapped and in yen pillowcase at the end of my bed. Over the years when I’ve been wrapping the 10th present for Santa at midnight on Christmas Eve, I think they were right!

AngelinaFibres · 06/02/2022 08:39

@EdenFlower

Having a bath while on your period is horrible- you end up sitting in bloody water and will be covered in diluted menstruation blood.
Not if you have a tampon in.
Cuck00soup · 06/02/2022 08:39

I was allowed one drink with meals; water at home but could have coke or lemonade if we were out. That one drink had to be sipped and made to last the whole meal though.

As with many of these, I think it was a hangover from parents who had grown up with rationing. And to be fair we did have to have standpipes in the street during the summer of 1977.

It just seems so bizarre to be rationing tap water, especially for people who could afford foreign holidays, 2 cars and meals out.

Tiredan · 06/02/2022 08:41

I always though my mum was super strict but reading some of these it turns out she was an absolute anarchist.Grin

Benjispruce5 · 06/02/2022 08:47

@Cuck00soup it was summer of 76, I remembered it well.
I agree re our parents being affected by post war conditions. My parents were war babies and it’s hard to shake that mentality off. Lots of it the anti waste attitude is now to be admired for the sake of the planet and our health. We never snacked or helped ourselves in the kitchen between mealtimes and those are good habits for life.

Thisbastardcomputer · 06/02/2022 08:49

@thenightsky

No cold drinks with fish and chips because 'it'll set the grease'
Ha ha, this was a great favourite of my miserable Scottish grandad
GETTINGLIKEMYMOTHER · 06/02/2022 08:50

Agree that a lot of these were money related. I grew up in the 50s and 60s, when food was relatively a lot more expensive, rationing was still remembered so waste was appalling, hardly anyone had an automatic washing machine, and we had no central heating until I was 14.

One bathroom* for 6 of us (no shower) so we couldn’t all have a bath every day, the solid fuel boiler would never have coped and the immersion was too expensive to have on all the time.
*the loo was separate, as was usual at the time.

A ‘proper wash’ with a sponge or flannel kept for the purpose, was what we had in between baths. And no, it wasn’t ‘eewww’ - it was what most people had to do for ages before plentiful hot water was a thing.

No choice at meals, TBH it wouldn’t have occurred to us - my DM cooked everything from scratch. She was a pretty good cook though. Between-meal snacks just weren’t a thing, but much of that was because money was always extremely tight. Only ever had orange squash or chocolate biscuits at birthday parties, or friends’ houses.

I used to love the occasional tea at a GM’s house - she would buy us ‘luxuries’ like Dairylea triangles and Wagon Wheels - things we never had at home.

We didn’t have TV until I was 11, but ITV wasn’t forbidden - I did know someone whose parents thought ITV was common, though.

My folks didn’t actually use the C word, but saying ‘lounge’ and ‘toilet’ was frowned on - had to say sitting room and lavatory - ditto women smoking in the street. And until he died my DF didn’t like to see women drinking pints! You’d have a half of lager or cider.

Compared to some pps’ stories, though, considering they were born in 1916 and 1918, my folks were pretty much non-weird. The other thing I notice now, though obv. not at the time, was that I never once heard a racist, homophobic or anti-Semitic word from either of them.

Juletide · 06/02/2022 08:55

When my mum wanted her Dr White's sanitary towels, I was given a note to hand to the chemist, who then handed them to me in a brown paper bag. I would also get her a 100 codeine tablets in a brown glass bottle with a little bit of cotton wool in the top. Next stop the newsagent for her 20 Kensitas. I would have been 9/10.

frazzledfragglefromfragglerock · 06/02/2022 08:55

@Changethetoner

Was never allowed black patent shoes, because they were reflective and might shine and show your privates.

After meals, we had to roll up and put our napkins back into our napkin rings (personalised ones). They would normally be washed once a week, and mother would be cross if anyone was overly messy and dirtied their napkin mid-week. This was particularly harsh for the two-year old sibling.

Completely missing the point of napkins!
theDudesmummy · 06/02/2022 08:58

When I was about 14 I asked my mother about periods etc, she said it was too soon to be asking and nothing more. I am still waiting for "the talk" and I am eight years past menopause!

Thisbastardcomputer · 06/02/2022 08:58

@5128gap

Baths were to have no more than a couple of inches of water. Otherwise my dad would apparantly have had to 'work night and day' to pay for the immersion heater. Women and girls only ever got one egg. Men and boys always two. The whole family had to sit in the back room even though there wasn't enough seats, and the 'good front room' was empty. All adults had to be referred to as auntie and uncle. Calling them by their first name was 'cheeky' Top of the pops had to be turned off if grandad was there in case he saw men in make up. At a push, you could leave veg if you were full, but could never ever leave meat. No nail varnish on toes. Very common. Also very common: eating in the street, ankle chains and bare legs.
I'm rolling at the bit about Top of the pop's being turned off in case grandad saw a man in make up.

My very miserable grandad would have a fit if Mick Jagger was on tv.

AngelinaFibres · 06/02/2022 09:01

@Chichimcgee

What did some of your mothers do about periods themselves? I'm relatively old for MNet (61) and my mum was very open about menstruation and pads/tampons.

My mum would be 59 now and when she started her period she thought she was dying. Literally woke up in a pool of blood with stomach pain. Nobody told her anything bless her so when I was growing up it was a normal thing to know about. She made sure. I knew what to expect long before it happened.

I am 56. Thankfully we had classes at my secondary school about 'growing up' so I knew about periods and stuff. My mother had to write a letter of permission .Perhaps she would have told me about such things if we hadn't had the classes, but I'm not totally convinced. I came home one day and there was a pack of sanitary towels, 2 pairs of massive pants with scratchy clips in and 'The Body form book of girls growing up' .She stood in the bedroom doorway, gestured at them and them ran away. I didn't have daughters but I hope I would have been less freaked out . My father seemed permanently horrified by the fact that I grew up
mizzo · 06/02/2022 09:02

What did some of your mothers do about periods themselves? I'm relatively old for MNet (61) and my mum was very open about menstruation and pads/tampons.
My mum had 'the talk' with me aged about 10 and told me her Mum hadn't told her anything. I started my periods not long after I turned 11 and told her, she just said "do you have anything to use"
I had a pack of tampons from the nurse at school so said "yes" and that was it, and as extra pack of tampons appeared in the bathroom every month. When I spoke to friends at school they were all horrified I used tampons because I wouldn't be a virgin!

gogohm · 06/02/2022 09:03

@EdenFlower

People didn't have baths most days, you just had a wash - I didn't have a shower until I was 12, weekly baths before, you skipped if on period. I love my power shower now!!!

TenoringBehind · 06/02/2022 09:04

No TV as it would rot the brain.
No jeans to be worn on a Sunday.
Not allowed to make hot drinks just because we fancied one. Tea and coffee served at set times.
No drinks with meals.
Clothes were divided into home clothes and going out clothes with no crossover.

AngelinaFibres · 06/02/2022 09:07

@justasking111

DM obsessed with my virginity so no makeup, no tights, no trendy clothes or shoes until I became a teenager. Pierced ears banned. I had to wear socks over my tights when I was finally allowed them. Tampons never discussed too rude.

When I got a weekend job finally had money I bought some pretty clothes came home one day to find that she had ripped them all up and strewn them across my bedroom. I realized then she was nuts

My parents were obsessed about me not being 'ruined' but the dresses thing is just cruel. Flowers
theDudesmummy · 06/02/2022 09:07

My mother classed everything "American" as "common". With the huge exception of Elvis, who she absolutely idolised. She had every record he ever made. For some reason the Rolling Stones were also a no-no, the Beatles were classed as fine, although she did not actually have any of their records. No logic!!.

Benjispruce5 · 06/02/2022 09:21

We didn’t have a shower until the mid 80s and it was an over bath one. In the 70s we had a rubber attachment on the bath taps for washing hair. My girls laugh when I describe washing my hair leaning over the bath with a plastic bowl to help rinse because the shower attachment didn’t give enough pressure to get the shampoo out. Didn’t use conditioner until the 80s either!

Cantgetgoing · 06/02/2022 09:22

I'm baffled by the rule that you aren't ill if you can get out of bed? I'm my 28 years I've never not been able to get out of bed but I obviously have been ill!

theDudesmummy · 06/02/2022 09:26

Always home perms as the hairdresser charged too much (1980s, so perm de rigeur). In 80s photos I don't look any worse than anyone else tbh.

wheresmyshoe · 06/02/2022 09:31

@Cantgetgoing

I'm baffled by the rule that you aren't ill if you can get out of bed? I'm my 28 years I've never not been able to get out of bed but I obviously have been ill!
It was to make being off school a very unattractive option and discourage any putting it on/skiving. Another poster mentioned the three day rule before a doctor's note was needed, both my parents worked and I was only allowed to be ill for three days as they would have needed a note to have time off with me. Bothering the doctor was seen as a very bad thing so after three days I was sent in. If I had visible symptoms (German measles, mumps etc.) I obviously had to be off so from about 8 I was left and my Dad would pop back at lunchtime if he could get away to check in on me. I was supposed to stay in bed but obviously sneaked downstairs to watch tv!
catwomando · 06/02/2022 09:32

@AutomaticMoon "red shoes means no knickers " Grin

3luckystars · 06/02/2022 09:33

Still waiting for my mother to tell me about periods too Grin

My friend told me at school as I don’t know what was happening. She said ‘blood comes out when you get to this age’ I was like ‘that’s that done so’ and she said ‘no, it’s EVERY MONTH’ Shock

ShallWeTalkAboutBruno · 06/02/2022 09:34

@EdenFlower

Having a bath while on your period is horrible- you end up sitting in bloody water and will be covered in diluted menstruation blood.
We didn’t have a shower, so the only way to get clean was a bath. And I wore tampons.
bexxboo · 06/02/2022 09:37

Dinner time was like an exam.

My father was so strict to this day I don't like eating in front of him.

It was like he was preparing us to dine with the queen. Ive now grown up basing my attraction to men on their table manners 😂😂😂

Swipe left for the next trending thread