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Original poster

Paying to attend child's party?

550 replies

arachnidpearl · 01/02/2022 11:15

Would welcome views on this.

My DS has been invited to a child's party on Sunday. It's at an activity place with a climbing wall then food afterwards. Accepted invitation weeks ago, have bought card and gift etc.

We've been sent a message yesterday from birthday child's parent last night which says that all children under 8 must be supervised by an adult each, which is ok with me I don't mind staying (would rather not, but it's not the end of the world) but that in order to stay and supervise we have to buy a full price adults ticket, which costs £25!

Is this usual? It seems a bit of a cheek to me!

OP posts:
Bypassed21 · 01/02/2022 13:30

I imagine there's been some miscommunication here somewhere. Either the venue didn't explain this policy when the host parent booked the party, or the charge of £25 has been misunderstood somewhere.

I think you need to query it with the host parent - you're not being rude to question it - as it does seem rather a lot - and odd.

If it turns out to be correct and there is this fee to supervise I'd be politely declining the invitation under those circumstances. Your child may be upset - the host child may be upset - but there will be other parties coming round and they'll both soon get over their disappointment.

ISmellBurnings · 01/02/2022 13:30

We’ve done clip n’ climb parties a couple of times and have never had to pay. Not even for being a ‘clipper’.

dipdye · 01/02/2022 13:30

Surely it's just their way of saying, please don't stay and hang around? We'll supervise the kids??

dipdye · 01/02/2022 13:32

Is your DS actually under 8???

Bookworm20 · 01/02/2022 13:36

Surely the venue would've made this clear when she booked the party for an 8 year old? If not, then I can't see how they can refuse to refund the cost of the party as its a pretty steep cost on top considering all the dc are 7!
Its ridiculous for them to ask a full price adult fee to just supervise at a kids party.

Problem is I bet your dc is rally looking forward to going, so pulling out will be very upsetting for them. I would definitely make it very clear to the mother though that you are very very not happy with this additional cost at last minute, once dc are all excited about it. Plus the whole thing about being pregnant! I bet you''re not even allowed to climb, so therefore how can they justify charging you full whack?

Definitely call the venue

SummerInSun · 01/02/2022 13:36

I'd check with the venue if it really has to be one adult per child. If not, get the parents to team up, eg could one parent be responsible for two or three DC if they "get upset"?

But unless the money is a meaningful amount to you, please, please don't cancel. None of this is the birthday child's fault and it will be so upsetting for him/her if it was only a small party anyway and some kids don't show up because the parents want to make a point about cheekiness.

kirinm · 01/02/2022 13:39

I'd probably go because I always feel terrible for cancelling things and doubt the mum realised this when she did the invites. But, I would not be very impressed by it. Seems a total piss take from the venue assuming the parents aren't actually using the wall / want to use the wall.

Vloggamamma · 01/02/2022 13:41

@SummerInSun

I'd check with the venue if it really has to be one adult per child. If not, get the parents to team up, eg could one parent be responsible for two or three DC if they "get upset"?

But unless the money is a meaningful amount to you, please, please don't cancel. None of this is the birthday child's fault and it will be so upsetting for him/her if it was only a small party anyway and some kids don't show up because the parents want to make a point about cheekiness.

I can see what you mean about a child being upset but isn’t it also enabling the parents shitty behaviour ? Maybe if the parents joined together and sent a collective text asking for alternative ideas that don’t cost but still allows the child a party , might be more reasonable.
LookItsMeAgain · 01/02/2022 13:43

Can I clarify that for your child to attend a party in the venue it only costs whatever you were going to be giving as a gift but if you're to stay and supervise (i.e. not drop your child and leave), then you're being asked to pay an entrance fee of £25?

So, the solution is just to drop your child off at the party and collect them when the party is over and they are done.

Am I missing something here?

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 01/02/2022 13:43

Can I place mark Wink

ISmellBurnings · 01/02/2022 13:43

How did the venue not mention this on booking?

WitchWithoutChips · 01/02/2022 13:44

The nearest climbing centre to us specifically states that pregnancy precludes women from using their climbing wall. The ts and cs at this place may be the same. Even if not I would contact them directly and insist on a spectator ticket.

arethereanyleftatall · 01/02/2022 13:46

@LookItsMeAgain

Can I clarify that for your child to attend a party in the venue it only costs whatever you were going to be giving as a gift but if you're to stay and supervise (i.e. not drop your child and leave), then you're being asked to pay an entrance fee of £25?

So, the solution is just to drop your child off at the party and collect them when the party is over and they are done.

Am I missing something here?

Yes. In the op it says the parents HAVE. To stay if dc under 8. They all are.
CorneliusVetch · 01/02/2022 13:49

@SummerInSun

I'd check with the venue if it really has to be one adult per child. If not, get the parents to team up, eg could one parent be responsible for two or three DC if they "get upset"?

But unless the money is a meaningful amount to you, please, please don't cancel. None of this is the birthday child's fault and it will be so upsetting for him/her if it was only a small party anyway and some kids don't show up because the parents want to make a point about cheekiness.

I agree with this. Possibly the parents are mortified having realised they have overlooked this charge which they cannot afford, and don’t want to disappoint their child. Possibly they are just tight fisted cunts. But either way, there is an 8 year old child at the centre that will be really upset if his or her mates all pull out. I would be pissed off but I would still go.
Zonder · 01/02/2022 13:50

What a cheek!

LookItsMeAgain · 01/02/2022 13:52

Ah...that clarifies it @arethereanyleftatall. Thanks. I didn't realise that ALL of the attendees at the party would be either 8 or under 8.

Dishwashersaurous · 01/02/2022 13:55

I think that this is an almighty cock up by the parents. My child is going to be 8. Other children must therefore be 8.

And now they are trying to brazen it out.

Normally these places require someone to be in loco parentis not the actual parent.

So you can say that you are happy for them to be the supervising adult.

Orchidflower1 · 01/02/2022 13:56

@nitsandwormsdodger

I would first check it wasn’t a a rushed typo
That’s what I was thinking- did she mean to put £2.50?
LittleOwl153 · 01/02/2022 13:57

I'd ring the venue on the basis of being pregnant - and therefore you assume not able to climb/participate and is there a spectator option. Ask them what is required in terms of attending a party and what the costs involved are.

Rollingwiththehomies · 01/02/2022 14:02

Well it would just be a firm “No” from me.

oakleaffy · 01/02/2022 14:06

That’s absolutely ridiculous!
What a badly arranged party.
Poor kid.

Bunnyfuller · 01/02/2022 14:08

£25 to stay? Have you checked with the venue? That seems very steep (see what I did there?!)

PatchworkElmer · 01/02/2022 14:09

Lots of places around here (soft play, trampolining and climbing) charge adults to stay and supervise. I’ve never paid £25 though!!

Original poster
arachnidpearl · 01/02/2022 14:09

Ok so I've rung the venue.

I am not allowed to be a supervising adult on account of being pregnant, I am not allowed in the vicinity of the climbing wall at all, just the cafe etc. But, all children under 8 must be supervised 1-1 and to enter the climbing area all adults must have a ticket (which is £25!)

So I cannot take DS anyway, the only option I've got is if I can get a grandparent or my sister to take him. But I will have to pay £25 for them to do so!

I queried the cost for adults on account of it being a party and they said they offer the option where the party bookers can pay for the supervising adults... or not. So I assume these parents have decided not!!

OP posts:
TopsieGreenwood · 01/02/2022 14:10

If a child is under 8 and a parent has to supervise them then what is the parent actually paying £25 for?

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