What's the weirdest job someone you know does?

[BowerOfBramble]

I mean the ones that you'd never heard of until someone you met/a friend of a friend said "oh yes I run a bat sanctuary/teach maths to prisoners/paint portraits of dead hamsters".

@FourChimneys

Dendrochronologist. Works out how old eg a wooden beam in a cathedral is by studying the tree rings.

Professional theorbo player. Look them up, such a cool instrument.

Bill Bailey plays one

I’ve worked in the racehorse breeding industry for many years - there’s a lot of very strange things you can be called on to do! From the amazing feeling of foaling down a mare to the ick-factor of inspecting the placenta afterwards.

On a non-horse related front, the job I envied the most was my cousin’s - years ago it was his job to travel the world visiting hotels so that he could write the reviews for his company’s holiday brochure

Friend of a friend did a chemistry degree then her first job involved working out how to clean up/ decontaminate in the event of terrorists using dirty bombs

Retired engineer who specialised in how to make submarines run silently, think he was one of the top people at this.

I also know a bat lady! She has a degree in electronic engineering which came in handy from the start as the engineering department of the local university would lend her sonar detection gear cos they trusted her not to break it. The other bat people would get her to go and ask to borrow it.

Royal protection officer - apparently Princess Anne is the nicest and Andrew is widely know as "the c##t" (way before all his shenanigans became public)

I used to perform risk assessments for a certain company's entire subsea pipelines in the North Sea...

Now I risk assess those pipes that you don't know exist under your feet.

Professional pantomime Dame

My mate's dad was a rollercoaster tester.

One of my old school friends is a contortionist. Another is regional sales manager for a pharmaceutical company but, when asked, she just says "I sell drugs!". The looks she gets are fabulous 😁

dispydoodlenoodle how on earth do you do either of those? I’ve always wondered!

A mathematician I knew applied for a job in intelligence, trying to crack his own country's codes.

I guess that's like the people who are employed to try to hack into computer systems, so the security flaws they identify can be fixed before a hostile hacker exploits them.

My friend dropped out of the selection process at an early stage. He said the procedure for getting a security clearance was harrowing. They were probing him persistently for any dirty personal secrets which the enemy might use in future to blackmail him. He also didn't much like the fact that he could be followed around and watched for the rest of his life, even long after he left the job.

@qualitygirl

I know someone who literally sleeps (whilst minding a house with other adults in it!) cushiest job ever. They work Friday night sat night and Sunday night...12 hour shifts so 36 hours. Paid about 20 an hour too...for sleeping 🤣🤣

@qualitygirl can you explain more? Why is there job to sleep?

@Hairyfriend

- A friend answers the phone when someone in the UK gets bitten by a bat that might have had rabies

• Another friend works in a laboratory, testing sewerage for levels of covid to see where outbreaks are happening

• A school friend now makes period costumes for films

I probably spoke to your friend when I got bitten by a bat that might have had rabies!

Historical building restorer- he oversaw a lot of the work on Windsor Castle after it went on fire .

Knew a bloke years ago who had 2 jobs - worked at a horse stud & was essentially a fluffer for the stallions & assisted the act. Second was a jousting knight in reenactment show.
Have also met ‘sheath cleaners’ for horses.

Wow my friends are boring!

Tested date rape drugs.

@hilariousnamehere

These are awesome. I am among other things a professional mermaid and I know a surprising number of others with the same job, quite a few do it full time.

Friend of a friend knows the Bean Queen who is an expert in removing hardened deposits from stallions boy bits that really is a job I didn't know existed!

The Bean Queen is quite a character. Our pony was less than impressed

Write the horoscopes for a magazine

ronconcoke - Pantomime Dame? You're not Berwick Kaler are you?

My sister used to be an expert witness. She specialised in soil remediation, so would write reports recommending how much a company should have to pay in damages if they'd been found guilty of polluting soil.

One case involved a Middle Eastern country which had allowed chemicals to be dumped in a river. The chemicals washed ashore in another country downstream, contaminating its soil along the river. She said it gave her a feeling of great power to recommend damages to the tune of hundreds of millions of pounds!

I know someone who worked for MNHQ - pretty cool to Mn and get paid for it

@RedRobin100

Teaches tiling to prisoners

I read this as "titillating" !!

My dad worked for customs and had to cover once for one of their trainers.... He had to role play a suspect for strip search training! Had never considered before that they use simulation/role play to train customs officers. What goes on behind closed office doors, eh? 🤪

Food photographer
Spider handler for children's parties
Professional handpan player