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“You complete me” “you are the best part of me”
47

Mymindisblown · 23/01/2022 10:07

Are these really the best things we can teach our children???

I won’t be.

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Waxonwaxoff0 · 23/01/2022 10:11

OK.

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EmmaGrundyForPM · 23/01/2022 10:11

I'm not sure I understand?

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Mymindisblown · 23/01/2022 10:14

Why are we taught we need another person to complete us? All the cards and things all say the same things.

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ShippingNews · 23/01/2022 10:14

I don't get it. What are we teaching our children ?

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ShippingNews · 23/01/2022 10:16

@Mymindisblown

Why are we taught we need another person to complete us? All the cards and things all say the same things.

I guess what it means is " you and I are different, but together we're a good team ". I don't see why that would be harmful for anyone.
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EmmaH2022 · 23/01/2022 10:17

I get it OP, it's awful, I wouldn't want to pass it on either.

Unfotunately, my god daughter's parents seem quite upset at the idea that their DD might turn out to be someone who prefers to be single.

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purpleme12 · 23/01/2022 10:19

Personally I hate it when people say 'I worship her/him'
Am whether that's about their partner or their child
It's the kind of thing you do for a God. You shouldn't worship people it's putting them on a pedestal

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FloatyBoaty · 23/01/2022 10:19

No I don’t teach my DS he “completes me”. I think it puts an inordinate amount of pressure on anyone to hear that.

He DOES know that he’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me, that he comes first, above anything else, and that I’m proud as anything to be his mum.

I didn’t know that when I was a kid. I wasn’t prioritised and I often felt like my parents weren’t interested in me.

It’s important to me that he feels differently.

But I’ve literally never ever heard anyone say “you complete me” to a child, so not sure where you’re hanging out….

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bonetiredwithtwins · 23/01/2022 10:20

You are over thinking

A part of me would feel missing if I had never had my children - isn't that the same way of saying that they complete me 🤷🏻‍♀️

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FindingMeno · 23/01/2022 10:20

Bleurgh

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FloatyBoaty · 23/01/2022 10:21

Oh hang on- you mean they hear it from parents, between parents?

Again- I’ve never heard anyone say that to a romantic partner- but I also think there are few kids that would read into that sort of thing between their parents. Or even notice it….

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Mymindisblown · 23/01/2022 10:22

Sorry from romantic partners…

Are we not complete without them?

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crossstitchingnana · 23/01/2022 10:22

I think that's damaging, to say that to a child. Could create a narcissist. The kids mean the world to me, and my dh, but I am important too and feel whole in myself. I don't need my dh I want him.

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ChaToilLeam · 23/01/2022 10:23

I wouldn’t like it. Sounds clingy and needy and smothering.

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languagelover96 · 23/01/2022 10:24

That is dangerous. Especially to children.

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Tullig · 23/01/2022 10:26

If someone said that to me, I’d be pointing out I’m not any part of them, and suggesting they found a therapist. And yes, I know it’s from Plato, but a classical origin doesn’t make a pernicious, co-dependent dynamic any less unhealthy.

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purpleme12 · 23/01/2022 10:27

I'm pretty sure OP is referring to things people say to their partner romantically/that you see on cards for partners

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Missushbb · 23/01/2022 10:28

have you been watching Jerry Maguire?

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hapagirl · 23/01/2022 10:30

I’ve only ever heard this in cheesy films and never in RL. I agree it’s not something we should teach our children and I would cringe if my DH of 20 years said such a thing.

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purpleme12 · 23/01/2022 10:31

I've definitely heard things like this in real life

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MajesticallyAwkward · 23/01/2022 10:33

Absolutely agree OP, I've always felt uncomfortable with the 'other half', 'you complete me' and expectation that one needs a romantic partner to be whole. Everyone of us is a whole person in our own right and that's the message we need to pass on and demonstrate to the next generations.

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ghostmouse · 23/01/2022 10:47

I’ve always thought that other half means just that..the other half of a couple..there’s just the two of you in a romantic relationship Confused I’ve never took it as it’s the other half of a person

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Luredbyapomegranate · 23/01/2022 10:49

It’s cheesy I agree. I don’t know anyone dippy or dysfunctional enough to say it IRL.

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Toanewstart22 · 23/01/2022 10:49

@Mymindisblown

Why are we taught we need another person to complete us? All the cards and things all say the same things.

This isn’t us teaching our children anything

This is the inside of hallmark cards

You sound a little..
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QuestionsorComments · 23/01/2022 10:53

Hmm. I am happily single and fiercely independent, but I do think the right partner (or friend) can bring out the best in a person and as with any team, the whole is more than the sum of it's parts.

I agree the message that without a man partner a person is nothing is awful though.

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