Best ever typos/mistakes

[WomanStanleyWoman]

Just a bit of fun… I was reminded of a famous one from our local Facebook group today. A woman had posted about how she was having a terrible problem with slugs coming into her house, and did anyone have any tips on getting rid of them. Unfortunately she’d accidentally typed ‘slags’ instead of slugs Cue much laughter at how she’d tried putting salt down, but it still didn’t help 😆

Another favourite is from a forum I used to use years ago. One poster got into an argument with another and told her she was acting like a prima donna. What made this a slightly less cutting insult was the fact that she’d written it as ‘pre-Madonna’. Perhaps she was accusing her of behaving like Debbie Harry

Colleague who wrote on the school newsletter about the upcoming annal fayre where there would be 'All sorts of experiences and seasonal adventures'. Oh how we laughed and laughed, particularly because he was a Maths teacher and we're the English teachers.

I have seen cunty council instead of county council many times. Although they're not wrong!

Oh gosh I thought of another one

I forwarded an email to a surveyor about the “below job”

And typed “Hi Dave, could you look at the blow job….”

😭😆 ffs

In a speed typing exam many years ago

I typed fuck sack instead of ruck sack

At my work, there are often signs on the staff kitchen areas requesting people please wash their bowels after eating.
It always makes me laugh! It's like people do it on purpose as well, otherwise why not mention plates or cutlery?

My friend messaged on a group chat saying she was fed up with her other half playing about with the willy inside of the WiFi. I still message her about it!

A colleague many years ago once sent a letter to an insurance client with the closing paragraph, "We look forward to hearing from you shorty". One hopes the recipient wasn't dimensionally challenged.

I once typed up a witness statement, instead of typing her 'ex - partner locked her out', I typed that he 'had licked her out.'
Luckily I spotted it before it got to Court.

Reading these and just had a row off DP for laughing and snorting when he's trying to watch Ghostbusters 🤣

I have two - work in a solicitors and sent a letter to Liverpool Cunty Court instead of County and another was a friend messaged me whilst watching Strictly saying "I love length" on about Len 🤣

@Goawayangryman

So many.

Colleague wrote about pubic finances. We publish direct to the web but luckily was picked up during a random review.

I was writing about the discount rate but autocorrect failed and what I actually wrote was discocunt.

Disco cunt is my new favourite word

I worked for a worldwide charity. Thousands of workers and PA to the top dog sent out an email to everyone which was signed off "sorry for the incontinence".

A friend of a friend texted her H to say "saw owl on way home!" but the typo meant it said "say owl on way home!" Mystified, he kept saying owl, owl, owl!

A new client called Herve was autocorrected to Herpes. Thank goodness he was a good guy! But what an introduction 🙊

I had a colleague named Whitty, who received a letter addressed to Miss Whippy. No idea what might have been on the letter-writer’s mind…

A colleague some time ago always mistyped the word 'shift' as 'shit'... so it would be what 'shit' would you prefer on various emails to staff or if anyone would like a particular shit can they give a weeks notice and a regular group email was titled shit rota for the next month...

Another was a job vacancy I saw once advertised in the local newspaper... it read 'fat typist required for busy legal department'... I remember fleetingly thinking why the typists size would matter but realised it should have read 'fast'!

In the early 90's I taught an IT class at college. The first lesson the students had included answering questions. One of the questions was where would could you save your work to keep it safe. One of the students wrote that they would use a floppy dick.

I once received a CV in application for a waitressing job from a lady who was very proud of her "Foof hygiene certificate".

One to an event we were going to that said the guest of honour Mr X would be accompanied by his wife Booby.

One at work which said open the spreadsheet and a massage will pop up.

Exeter Scrapstore uses the #exeterscrapstore which is pretty appropriate but always makes DH chuckle.

During my uni exams (in 2009) my best friend texted me asking how its going. Having spent the entire day procrastinating I tried to tell her so. Instead I texted "euch terribly. Can't get anything done cos I am the queen of copulating". Thanks autocorrect. How it got from procrastinating to copulating ill never know

@tillytoodles1

I sent a text to a plumber saying "can you ring me please", but due to autocorrect and my bad typing, it said tickle me instead. I got someone else!

I

Hahaha!

@Woodlandarchitect

Does anyone remember when Susan Boyle released an album and the Twitter hashtag was #susanalbumparty

Oooooh it’s caused me to laugh out loud for years!!

I can remember when people were abbreviating her name to SuBo and thinking that that really wouldn't have worked well for Pete Docherty.

A few years ago I got my S-i-L a stocking filler book called "Damn You, Autocorrect", full of unfortunate messages. Very good www.amazon.co.uk/Damn-You-Autocorrect-Jillian-Madison/dp/0753540088/ref=sr_1_1?crid=IBQTLQUBL610&keywords=damn+you+autocorrect&sprefix=damn+y%2Caps%2C104&tag=mumsnetforu03-21&qid=1642417552&sr=8-1. The worst ones are generally those sent to mums and bosses...

@Innatenvi

I have seen cunty council instead of county council many times. Although they're not wrong!

I've had that one too. Also a guide to what one can do in the cuntryside.

I once emailed someone about Hampshite instead of Hampshire.

Has anyone mentioned the "fried minge" thread from a few years ago? It took a while before the OP realised her typo and in the meantime was puzzled as to why posters were making jokes and not replying to her question about fried mince.