I've copied and pasted this from the MH board as Although I've had lots of kind responses I'm thinking maybe it would be better to have responses from people who aren't to clued in on mental health if that makes sense? Because actually I want to know what it feels like to live through this without anxiety.
I've had health anxiety for years. It peaks and troughs. Was very bad in March April 2020 but has been manageable.
There's me, dh (works from home 75% of the time) and ds (15) and dd (11). Ds had covid (delta?) in October and has had second vaccine last week. Dd too young for vaccines and me and dh triple vaxxed.
Dh is 44 and I'm 40. He is a bit overweight I am severely overweight - massively . I have lost 3 stone but still have a crazy amount to lose. Kids and I have asthma. I'm also disabled with chronic severe pain.
I am CONVINCED I will die if I catch omicron. Just typing that makes my heart race. I am terrified.
Kids obviously at school and seeing friends etc - I don't want them to know how anxious I am.
Ds has a runny nose today and I'm a wreck (in private) imagining all the worst case scenarios. Dh is exhausted from listening to me being in constant panic and paralysed with fear.
I don't really know why I'm posting, I'm struggling. Usual anxiety meds aren't doing anything. I haven't been in a shop or a cafe for almost 2 years, or had a friend in the house etc. I have let the kids do these things and we've done outdoor stuff in summer.
Right now I'm wondering - am I a terrible person for not getting a PCR for ds who has a runny nose and has coughed twice. My mind is whirring and I think I need a bit of a reality check - I don't think most people are feeling like this are they?? Are they?