Do you know your child has adhd from a young age?

[OnceuponaRainbow18]

Thanks for reading.

I was wondering if your child has adhd if you knew this from a young age? My son has just turned 3 and I’ve suspected for a while he may have adhd, I did call our GP to talk about it, and they dismissed it as him being too young, which I do understand. But, I also feel like if he does have it surely early intervention may help? Or maybe I’m overthinking it all.

I think he may have adhd because:
He cannot sit still, from the min he’s awake he’s buzzing
He can’t manage/regulate his emotions
He can’t wait his turn, even if it’s to speak
He has no impulse control
If he’s excited he always goes over the top
He has never slept well, takes an hour to fall asleep, just chats and chats and chats

Any thoughts from people with experience of children with adhd would be much appreciated!

My adult ds clearly had difficulty /differences. 30 years ago it wasn't easily recognised.. He actually had bpd..diagnosed a few years ago only.
Ds13 is being assessed for autism.. Absolutely no 'signs 'until the past 2 years. Although in reflection a lot of 'quirks' now make sense.
And absolutely out of my depth tbh.
The spectrum is so vast I would assume your GP isn't keen to jump to conclusions as some aren't. Maybe get a second opinion?

5 year old currently being assessed so I can't be certain but pretty sure he has it and has been apparent since around 3 too.

Does your child attend a nursery / childminder who have concerns?

@RosieLemonadeAndSugar

What kind of behaviours make you think they have adhd?

He’s at nursery 3 days a week and I’ve raised it and they say he behaves fine there- they are such a relaxed setting I worry they miss it or he does behave ‘normally’ there and then home is his release.

@Santaisstilleatingmincepies

Do you mind me asking what kind of quirks?
And yes another GP is a good idea!

Yes- my son is nearly ten now. He was diagnosed with adhd and Asperger's a few years ago now.

But I always knew he was 'different'! I called it 'quirky'.

It showed a lot more in reception at school.

He wasn't medicated but we all decided to start medication last July- it's not Ritalin though it is a non stimulant. It's helped him a lot with concentration and friendships at school

[quote OnceuponaRainbow18]@RosieLemonadeAndSugar

What kind of behaviours make you think they have adhd?

He’s at nursery 3 days a week and I’ve raised it and they say he behaves fine there- they are such a relaxed setting I worry they miss it or he does behave ‘normally’ there and then home is his release.

@Santaisstilleatingmincepies

Do you mind me asking what kind of quirks?
And yes another GP is a good idea![/quote]
All your points you've listed apply to my son.

He cannot sit still, from the min he’s awake he’s buzzing - exactly the same! He literally does not stop! He's only just managing to stay in the classroom a lot more since year one as he used to just get up and walk out.

He can’t manage/regulate his emotions ( this is a massive one for him and has caused quite a few problems since he's been at school as he can get quite angry / frustrated quickly and doesn't understand how not too - although this has improved a lot since October )

He can’t wait his turn, even if it’s to speak

He has no impulse control - he just does things because it seems they just pop into his head and sometimes can be dangerous

If he’s excited he always goes over the top
He has never slept well, takes an hour to fall asleep, just chats and chats and chats ( my son generally takes 45 mins to get to sleep and wakes up repeatedly through the night, even now at 5 )

He also seems to have some sensory issues, like he hates loud noises, he often complains things are 'too loud' I think it's too much going on in his brain and he can't concentrate.

@RosieLemonadeAndSugar

Thank you for replying! Have you found any strategies that work well? I feel like nothing I try works that well!!!

My DS has been diagnosed with ADHD - he was diagnosed age 11 but I knew he had it from about age 3. My DH also has ADHD but I only got DS diagnosed because it was becoming problematic for him at school. He takes medication which has been an enormous help.

I would advise you to look up ADD-Vance who run a charity and have with loads of advice on their website. I went on one of their courses and realised I too had ADHD - although the ADD sort where you aren’t visibly affected but you find concentration and organisation difficult. It seems to be in the genes so worth looking into your closest relatives if you’re in touch with them to see if any of them are effected.

[quote OnceuponaRainbow18]@RosieLemonadeAndSugar

Thank you for replying! Have you found any strategies that work well? I feel like nothing I try works that well!!![/quote]
Just routine. I can't stress enough how much routine helps. We do the same things at the same times and it seems to help a little. It's like he knows what's coming then so his brain isn't in overdrive.

Trying to be understanding too which is probably harder with a 3 year old but when he's angry / frustrated / can't see why he can't do something / interrupt etc I try and talk to him like I'd talk to an adult and explain 'I know it's frustrating' 'I understand how you feel' just validating that it's ok to feel the way they do but try to teach him to manage these outbursts.

It's going to be a long road ahead but hopefully you can get some support from a gp / CAMHS. My son had his referral back in October and we're still waiting but I think a long wait is expected. The school have been quite good and he also has play therapy with a therapist once a week.

I also second starshaped ... his dad has it and a cousin from his dads side. It's often in families.

My DS has just been diagnosed at 10 ( long battle!) but yes I always knew something was different. A nursery teacher also mentioned it to me when he was 4 ( at a school nursery) but we were both dismissed. When I had my second child it then became even more obvious to me.

Gives me some hope pp saying medication has helped - we are just about to start medication and I’m really hoping it helps him at school.

My daughter is waiting for a diagnosis she’s already diagnosed with with autism so I didn’t noticed the adhd,
As lots of it seems similar but I always knew there seemed like there was something more it was when the school brought it up to me, she’s 10

DS, now 10, has ADHD and was like that at 3 OP (except he always slept like a log), but at the time we thought that was just him being 3. So I'd say your DS still could just be a fairly typical 3yo on that evidence.

TBH it only really showed up when he was getting really behind in school - also kind of masked by being an August baby, but by about Y3 of school it was obvious something was up.

In retrospect DH and I both reckon DH has it - he's seen a therapist who has said he doesn't seem to quite meet the threshold but definitely doesn't appear to be quite neurotypical - very intelligent, 'marmite' personality, has lost a few jobs due to personality clashes despite best efforts to learn from previous experiences and feeling sure he was moderating himself. When things have gone wrong he gets described as 'disruptive', though he's always really trying not to be precisely because he knows he gets seen that way.

I should add I think ADHD often isn’t diagnosed until older because many of the traits can also be present to an extent in young children generally. So schools often don’t notice or think the child is just ‘naughty’.

Please don’t do what I did and believe school against your own instincts. I did and it led to my child being labelled, treated as ‘naughty’, told off constantly and has left him with long term damage re self confidence and attitude to school. It’s hard but you do have to fight for your child at many schools ( I don’t mean be impolite but equally don’t assume the school knows better). Also take a look at some ADHD charities - they can be very helpful ( ADHD foundation has some good info)

My ds1 has autism and adhd diagnosis. They don’t generally diagnose ADHD until at least 6 at the youngest. The reason the paediatrician said is because most young children demonstrate ADHD type behaviour at a young age particularly toddlers. The difference is most grow out of it by 6. Ds showed more signs of autism apps he loved routine, lining things up and had sleep difficulties from very young. He was always active still is. My other 2 boys are active but both can concentrate etc when need be which is the difference.

Thanks for sharing your experiences.

My son is also a routine lover, have about ten things we need to do before he’ll even consider going to bed.

@OnceuponaRainbow18
My DS is also 3 (an august baby too) and i could have written your post apart from the sleep bit.
He is a million miles an hour, gets angry & frustrated too easily and can't wait his turn to do anything.
I also think he has ADHD but everyone tells me he is just a typical 3 year old 🤷🏻‍♀️

My son is 6 years old and recently diagnosed with ADHD. He was quite calm as a baby, but as soon as he started crawling / walking it did feel as though he was “driven by a motor”. There were some difficulties preschool and reception. There really started to be issues as he reached year 1 and the classroom became more structured. He is doing great now we and his teachers understand his condition. He has also started medication.

It may differ across the country but I felt community paediatrics was a better route than CAHMS. They only assess from age 6.

Enjoy your little toddler and his bags of energy. See how he goes over the next couple of years, and how he settles at school. If struggling in reception visit your GP and ask for a referral.

Do some reading online to try some simple strategies. Lots of fresh air and exercise, and keep a regular routine. Avoid sugary food in the evening!!

I'm starting to suspect. Tbh, I've been in denial for a couple of years. It runs in the paternal side of his family so the odds are against him. He's now 4.5 and I'm getting to the stage where I'm struggling. I keep telling myself everything is a phase and he will grow out of it, but of course he never does .

I don't know what the next step is. As far as I'm aware he's perfect at school and GP will fob me off , then there's the long referral process, so I'm thinking why bother

Your list just sounds like a normal 3 year old. And you say he’s only just turned 3.. so presumably you had these concerns when he was 2 as well?

I don’t think many 2 or 3 year olds can regulate their emotions, contain their impulses, contain their excitement etc.

@GemmaRuby

I can see how it would seem like ‘normal’ behaviour when written down like that, but in real
Life it’s really extreme. Like, we went to a farm and he was so excited about being there he ran out to a chicken and kicked it! It’s like he has absolutely no control and also no fear at all.

My son is 4 and sounds very similar. To be honest the majority of 4 year old boys that I know are the same.

I echo a pp saying don't let your gut instinct be over ruled by school, as and when you feel he needs recognition and support, keep sharing your concerns until a professional listens and refers him.

You can also read up on ADHD, particularly around sensory strategies, and help your son find which sensory strategies work for him. Try trampolining (amazing), swinging, bouncing on a therapy ball in front of TV. Also try vibrating toys you hold on your lap, or a weighted blanket or lap pad. And a wobble cushion.

I have two neuro diverse children (both diagnosed autistic) and plenty was evident by age 3 in terms of autism. However I think my youngest (now 4) also has ADHD , but as you are finding, professionals won't consider that until age 6. I strongly wonder if, in time, ADHD medication may help her. She is a very verbal and articulate little person and she has an astonishing capacity to describe her thought processes and lack of impulse control!! Several times, after doing some impulsive or dangerous, I asked her why she did it and she replied, very simply and sincerely, "I had a thought in my head that told me to do it so I did it."

DS is 13 and has ADHD and I knew there was something going on with him from well before 3, but didn't know what it was. He was just like an energiser bunny and never stopped. And his sleep was awful, and he had sensory issues with clothes and food. And he would just run away from anywhere cause he thought it was fun. He was absolutely adorable but it was just relentless keeping up with him.

Yes I knew when he was 2

My now adult son was diagnosed with ADHD at age 9 he had absolutely no sign of anything other than usual childhood behaviour until he was 7. We racked our brains thinking had we missed something before then but really there was nothing. He had impulse control issues and ODD rather than hyperactivity, he was very extreme with his behaviour from age 9 and it came as a huge shock.