If you don’t celebrate Christmas or don’t do much for it, what do you do and why?

[Blackbutler86]

Just that really. I’ve never been particularly interested in Christmas, I loved it as a kid of course and then when I got to my teenage years and beyond I found it all quite boring. I’m not entirely sure why but possibly because I don’t come from a close family. We aren’t the sort that sit around chatting, laughing and playing games etc. After moving out I used to go to my parents who always host dinner but the past 4 years I have stayed at home and I will again this year. The past 2 years and this one I haven’t even put up any decorations or done anything ‘Christmassy’. I only did it prior as it just seemed like the thing you are supposed to do. It will just be me, my partner and our dogs indoors on the actual day and it will be pretty much like any other day. I am making a roast dinner of sorts but we don’t do presents or anything. People always find this so weird when I tell them. What do you do if you also don’t do a traditional type Christmas?

I don't like Xmas and find it boring. Me and dh don't bother with decorations or presents, we don't have a TV so don't watch Xmas shows. We have young adult dcs who like a roast dinner and then do their own thing, they're happy as long as they're fed. We do a few presents for them. The rest of the time is spent just relaxing and doing our usual things. We have no relatives to faff on with. It's fine and suits us. We did used to make more effort when the dcs were young, but can't be bothered now.

We'll have a nice dinner and some sweet treats but there's no turkey, no tree, no presents. I buy my mum a card and I'll give her call in the morning because I know she appreciates that but she doesn't want gifts either. We use this break to rest and reflect rather than fill it with lists of things to buy and do.

I’m very much like you in that I find Christmas boring now I’m an adult, I don’t bother with any decorations and just try and ignore as much of it as I can. I had gotten into the habit of going abroad for Christmas to a country that doesn’t traditionally celebrate it although obviously that wasn’t possible last year or this year due to Covid.

Last year I had planned to go to my parent’s home but due to Covid restrictions ended up not being able to go and spending it at home where I live alone, I didn’t do anything special for it at all and just spent the day watching Netflix and eating chocolate which was perfect. I purposefully haven’t made any plans for the day this year and hopefully will do the same and just spend it at home enjoying my own company and ignoring it as much as possible.

Christmas is about children. We are very happily childfree by choice, and there are no children in our immediate families. Neither of us are religious and we both detest pointless wasteful consumerism so Christmas is very low-key in our house. No tree, no decorations, no Turkey.

We do buy some nice food & wine to enjoy on Christmas Day, and we usually go to a big sporting event on Boxing Day. Then it’s back to work between Christmas & New Year. We don’t take leave at this time of year so we can fit in more holidays when the weather is better.

I'm not a Christmas person either.
You're right, other people do find it weird.

In fact, I'd go as far to say I have found some people are really offended I don't "do" Christmas.

I've never suggested stopping others from celebrating, just that I don't decorate or sing Christmas songs etc. But for some reason some people get very angry with me

My best Christmas was by myself, hummus, Ben and Jerry's ice cream and a lot of rum.

Go skiing usually.

We dont celebrate Christmas because I belong to another religion but we do ,(or used to) get together and have a nice roast dinner because everyone is off work.

Personally I wouldn’t celebrate Christmas because I can’t stand the commercialisation and the pressure put on (mainly women) people to compete and conform.
This year we’ll have a nice dinner and enjoy a few treats but I haven’t written a single card or bought any presents. The artificial Christmas tree has gone to the recycling centre too!
The only time I would make some effort is if the DGCs were visiting, as I think it’s mainly for children.

I loved it as a child too, but now I really can take it or leave it. I don't like the forced jollity. In hindsight I used to like the family meal and the presents, but then I'd go to my room to be on my own.
I have form for trying to find a quiet place alone even for a little while, at any large gathering.
Now our children have grown up, DH and I see them on Christmas Eve and Boxing Day. Often we'll go for a meal the week before Christmas at some point.
I feel quite rebellious about the whole thing. Takes the pressure off our family though. None of that having to keep us happy for them. They go to the in laws, and it saves them having to try to be 'fair' knowing that we're happy on our own!
On Christmas day I work in the morning usually while he cooks us a nice roast, then we take the dog on the downs for a lovely long walk ( assuming it's not raining hard), then we settle in front of the telly/read and generally chill. A lovely long luxurious bath usually features as well.

I buy gifts for people I love who care about Xmas and that's it. Often we go on holiday and pretend it's not happening. This year I'll probably get a curry and some booze and watch a box set. People definitely think I am an arsehole for not liking Xmas. I have no idea how it impacts them!

We don’t celebrate as we belong to another religion, don’t really do anything in particular on the 25th but it’s quite nice to go for a walk as the parks are quieter. We live in a multicultural area so a lot of the shops and workplaces will still be open, my DH will still be working. We get all the gifts for our own celebrations in the big sales afterwards which is handy

I am from a mixed immigrant family and we celebrated Christmas because some family members did as we all lived in one household.

I married someone who celebrates Christmas and when the children were little we would stay home and have a nice time and do stockings and Father Christmas and presents under the tree.
But over the years we have had some really awful Christmases. We have missed many through illness and had horrible times on others we managed to miss 3 Christmas days in a row because of various illnesses and issues.

As the children have grown up and no longer believe in Santa we decided that we would celebrate Christmas every other year and go on holiday every other year.

This worked out really well and in 2018 we went to Las Vegas. I don’t gamble or drink alcohol, the children were not 21 so it was hard that they couldn’t do a lot of things that they take for granted back in the U.K.
However it was one of our best holidays and we were thinking about going back as we didn’t get to do all the things we wanted to do.
2019 we stayed in the U.K. and we were all ill. Later we saw the symptoms for Covid and we believe that is what we had.

We haven’t been away since.
Apart from the fact Lockdowns have decimated our finances we are too scared of rules changing and having to isolate in a hotel on return (can’t afford the £7-8000 it would cost us and we couldn’t cope staying in one room.
Not sure if I will ever go away again at this rate.

This is really interesting but I also wonder what things you do instead? For example Christmas is something I sort of plan and look forward to for a lot of the year. I'm guessing you do this wirh something else?

For example my friend does the same sort of thing with Eid instead

Not fussed at all. Most years, we go away for a few days, usually to a European city where their museums & art galleries stay open. Do send cards & presents to friends, to be polite.
Have always said "no family at Xmas", and stuck to it for over 30 years - makes it stress-free, particularly in the years when one or both of us may have been working over the period.
This year at home, for obvious reasons. No tree or decorations. No turkey, as don't like it. Smoked salmon & champagne on 25th. All back to normal from 26th, altho time off work is welcome.
Only thing I will do that is at all Christmassy is listen to Nine Lessons & Carols on Xmas Eve on Radio 4, which I do enjoy & is what Christmas is supposed to be all about, after all.

Oh I’ve finally found my tribe!

It’s nice to meet you all. I’ve been happy to be the ‘weird’ one but it is somehow comforting to know there are others out there 🥰

I don't 'do' Christmas either. I've always hated it, even as a child. I had an abusive upbringing (both parents); my father would always go to the pub on Christmas day lunchtime, come home worse for wear and the atmosphere would turn bad.

The run up to Christmas was anxiety provoking, all of the pretence around a fake person, Santa Claus, went totally against my rigid need for truth (for context I am autistic), I hate surprises and I hate opening gifts in front of people.

My mother is incredibly manipulative and it took me until I was in my 40's to say I'm not doing Christmas any more.

For the past decade or so, Christmas day is spent in peace with DH. We have a nice dinner, go for a walk if we want to, watch TV in the comfort of our own home if we wish and there are no social pressures at all.

The commercialism of Christmas is so ugly. People getting heavily into debt to buy things that are half price 2 days after Christmas just seems like utter madness to me.

Opting out of it all was one of the best decisions I've ever made.

The only thing that pisses me off about it now is everyone moaning about how they have to do this, that and the other. They don't have to do anything. They choose to.

I hear you, @Clarice99... glad you’ve found someone special who understands you

We put up a tree, get some presents got DC and a few for each other, and have lunch with my in laws on the day. That's about it! Low stress, low pressure

I absolutely loathe it, I haven't had a tree since my youngest DC was about 10, haven't sent cards for years and don't do presents for anyone nor do I expect any
I have been known to cook ham egg and chips/sausage mash after asking my 3 DC's and DP if they want 'the Christmas dinner' with all the bells and whistles, usually it's 'nope it's ok we'll have anything', so that's what I do
I hate the commercialism and greed, I worked in Retail for years until a Career change and it really opened my eyes to the amount of money that was being spent, the debt that people were getting in, the stress levels, the expectations etc
My DM is nearly 90, and she has asked me this year to do the big festive dinner, I'm doing it, I'm not getting stressed and if I havent got stuff/forgotten anything then tough shit, it's just another day
Quite frankly I'll be glad when it's all over for another year and we can move into 2022.

Didn’t celebrate it at all as a child, I don’t really celebrate it as an adult, I do buy my son a few presents so he doesn’t feel left out in the ‘what did you get chat’ at school in January. My husband does celebrate christmas, but not massively, so we have a tree, but apart from that we don’t do anything.

I usually volunteer at christmas, I’m unable to this year, but usually I help with cooking and serving christmas meals to the homeless/vulnerable/lonely people.

Nice to find some like minded souls! I, too, do not 'do' Christmas, for a variety of reasons:
I live alone and have no living family, so the idea of Christmas trees, decorations etc seems a little pointless and my only concession is to send a few cards to those friends who I don't see very often - don't send, give or expect presents.
The greed, gluttony, rampant consumerism, self indulgence and waste does not sit easily with me when so many, throughout the world, don't even have access to shelter, food or water.
The merry-go-round of present buying and thinking of things to buy for others and receiving unwanted stuff in return also seems totally pointless and, since I don't watch much television anyway, the annual feast of junk TV also holds no interest for me!
In actual fact, as a horticulturalist and grower, the Winter Solstice and upturn towards Spring is far more significant and important.
The only virtue I can see is time away from work - to concentrate on my own things - this year I am part way through a major renovation project in my house and Christmas Day looks as though it will be spent plastering! However, I will also probably spend a day beach fishing, over the holiday period, if the tides are right!
Best wishes to all, whatever you choose to do and however you spend the holiday period

We watch The Hogfather and order a takeaway. During that my kids' finish making and put up decorations for New Year that I'll find in odd places over the next few weeks. That and work is pretty much the plan for the 25th.

Before kids, I lived in the US and would go to the movies with others and get food too when I could. Oddly, even in a very religious area, it was much easier to avoid and not celebrate Christmas. Here it can be a struggle. I found Christmas stressful growing up, no positive associations.

This is really interesting but I also wonder what things you do instead? For example Christmas is something I sort of plan and look forward to for a lot of the year. I'm guessing you do this wirh something else?

I like to plan things to look forward to all year. Yesterday, we pulled out all the fun hats and things for New Year's and discussed what the kids would really like to do next year if things go well and I start building up possible times for that. There are a few bigger things, but nothing so big that it would take more than a few months to cost and plan.

The whole one day/period people put so much on I think is part of why I found it stressful growing up - like there was a lot riding of the adults happiness of me playing that part.

Once we've exchanged presents, yes Christmas seems rather pointless and it tends to be a normal family day.

I do quite a lot of online shopping after lunch!

Nondualist. Don't do human created concepts!