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Original poster

The man who raped me has a good life. That hurts me. That’s it really.

61 replies

Pleasegivemeyourwisdom · 18/12/2021 21:25

Life can be cruel can’t it?
I’m just sad. My life’s pretty good but I’m sad. He caused me great harm, a harm that continues for many women today. Shame he looks like an upstanding citizen. No one would guess. Not even his darling wife and kids. But I know. I know.

OP posts:
Malibuismysecrethome · 18/12/2021 22:12

Why don’t you report the rape now to the police. It may help you and scare him

Original poster
Pleasegivemeyourwisdom · 18/12/2021 22:16

Too long to report sadly.
He’s got shit loads of money.
Me… not so much.
My only hope is that he’s happy with his wife and 3 sons and is no longer deviant of heart.
That’s my hope.

OP posts:
Emerald5hamrock · 18/12/2021 22:17

I'm sorry he hurt you.

I hope life catches up on him and his dies in pain.

twilightermummy · 18/12/2021 22:18

I think I recognise you from a previous post and I’d just like to say that, although he seems happy, he won’t be. He knows what he is and he knows that another person out there knows what he really is. He’s quite simply, a fraud. Therefore, he won’t be living the sort of life that a normal person with his privileges has if that makes sense.

Original poster
Pleasegivemeyourwisdom · 18/12/2021 22:19

I’m scared that he is 😞

OP posts:
Original poster
Pleasegivemeyourwisdom · 18/12/2021 22:19

And I meant fuck all,

Literally, fuck all 😫

OP posts:
SpinDoctor · 18/12/2021 22:20

The man who raped me led a very happy life.

I was advised quite strongly that he would most likely walk free in court : lack of DNA evidence and that sort of thing.

He then died, of natural causes very young.

His death did not bring me peace. I had a lot of therapy.

Thanks The person behind this username believes you and wishes you find happiness

LostThePot · 18/12/2021 22:21
Flowers
SituationCritical · 18/12/2021 22:21

Terrible. I'm so sorry OP, sometimes life just isn't fair Flowers.
I went to school with a girl whose boyfriend used to beat the living daylights out of her...in public with no hint of shame. This was witnessed by not only teachers and students but other members of the public and nobody did anything. He was a piece of shit. At 6th form level he punched her so hard in the face at the bus stop, I remember the horrible sound it made and it's stuck with me for years and years. She was about 4 years older than me and always kind to me, just a troubled soul. Sadly she has passed away and he lives a lovely life with a wife and children and lots of friends. I can't see his face on social media without feeling bitter on her behalf and wonder if half his mates realise what he used to do and if the ones from school just gloss over what he was like. I think of her often and with love. I send you all the best wishes in the worldx

FictionalCharacter · 18/12/2021 22:21

Yes - I’d like a sorry too. Not happening but it would have made all the difference. I’d like him to be ashamed and to apologise to me.

Arethechildreninbedyet · 18/12/2021 22:22

I’m so sorry OP, life is brutally unfair.

If you get any comfort from life beit you are you and he is him. You are a wonderful, empathic, good person and he is a cunt, a wealthy cunt, but a cunt all the same.

Appearances are also extremely deceiving. You see a beautiful family, a loving home etc but I would put my mortgage on the fact that is not the case. Once an abuser, always an abuser - his wife and children will experience this in other ways.

You raise your children with love and truth, he cannot. You win, as much as it doesn’t feel like it.

Garysmum · 18/12/2021 22:23

I found out the man who did this to me is now in a senior position of power with vulnerable young adults.

Original poster
Pleasegivemeyourwisdom · 18/12/2021 22:24

You are making my sore heart less sore.

OP posts:
converseandjeans · 18/12/2021 22:24

You should report it. How did your parents not safeguard you? Was he a family friend?

I can see why you are upset & it seems unfair that he has moved on. I find it unlikely that you're the only victim.

Kanaloa · 18/12/2021 22:27

Have you ever spoken to anyone about this to work through your feelings? I totally know where you’re coming from and it can consume you but I had to let these feelings go for my own sanity. Not because I forgive those who have hurt me in life but because I can’t allow them to keep hurting me. I had to speak to a counsellor and be able to verbalise my feelings to work through them. It’s monumentally hard.

Original poster
Pleasegivemeyourwisdom · 18/12/2021 22:28

Ps. ThNks for helping me through my mini heart breakdown. Can’t tell my husband. He doesn’t deserve the pain.

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Original poster
Pleasegivemeyourwisdom · 18/12/2021 22:28

I tried counselling,

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Original poster
Pleasegivemeyourwisdom · 18/12/2021 22:31

She said, it was along time ago. Not in my nightmares lady. I’m now the breadwinner. Very little time for me with 3 Kids. His parents live nearby. I dread bumping into them, they give me updates on his life. I can’t say, please don’t. They’re old. He’s a rapist and the apple of their eye.

OP posts:
Foolsrule · 18/12/2021 22:33

I’d make sure everyone knew. In their hearts, they’ll know it’s true. There’ll be others too. It won’t just be you. Good luck.

Original poster
Pleasegivemeyourwisdom · 18/12/2021 22:34

Thank you.

The thing is, he doesn’t LOOK. Bad ? I doubt you’d know 😢

OP posts:
Kanaloa · 18/12/2021 22:36

It sounds like you unfortunately met a bad counsellor. There are good ones.

I would try to be more assertive with social media/mutually known people. So I would block anyone who follows him so you can’t see updates and if his parents stop you just say ‘sorry I’m in a hurry right now.’ You don’t owe them anything.

Athenajm80 · 18/12/2021 22:44

I was raped at 14 by a family friend who was "so good looking, all the girls wanted him" 🤨 Yeah ok. I may or may not have agreed back then, I can't remember. Last time I saw him, which was a long time ago, he tried to stop and chat to me like nothing had happened. Twat. Last I heard, he was married with kids. I am single, no kids.

However, the way I see it, I have never treated someone as badly as that fuckwit did (apparently I wasn't the first, he had a thing for young teen girls and "coercing" them from what I heard). He may think he's happy and living his best life, but he is a pathetic piece of shit who can only feel power or like he's a man by forcing young girls to fuck him. Shit, if he wants to live his life being that fucking pathetic and weak, I actually pity him. I might have done some not so great stuff in my life, but I know who I am and I don't need to hurt those more vulnerable than me in order to validate myself.

These fucking idiots can easily give off the "great man, great life" shit, but when they're alone, the dark, with just their thoughts to keep them company, they know what they really are and how fucking worthless they are. WE ARE SURVIVORS, we can take their shit and rise above it. We are better than them and they know it, deep down inside.

Stay strong, let yourself feel what you feel, then realise how amazing you are compared to that prick. You are living a better life cause you're not poisoning children or anyone else.

converseandjeans · 18/12/2021 22:54

athenajm80 have you thought about reporting it? It's awful that someone who was a 'family friend' gets away with this sort of thing.

Original poster
Pleasegivemeyourwisdom · 18/12/2021 23:02

Thanks all

OP posts:
Sarahlou63 · 18/12/2021 23:08

You have options open to you, if you so chose. What would you like your future to look like?

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